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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇴 has viewed:

I always work very hard and intensively to ensure that my wife can proudly say: “That idiot over there? Yes, that’s mine!”

Someone from 🇲🇷 has bookmarked:

People who like sweet potato fries can’t be taken seriously and deserve shame and ridicule.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has viewed:

Desperately seeking my soul, mate.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has downloaded:

69. Some might call it nasty. I call it a romantic dinner for 2.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has viewed:

Why insult someone when you can say something nice in a very sarcastic tone?

Someone from 🇪🇷 has bookmarked:

If my cats are going to insist upon me getting up early, they’re going to have to learn how to make coffee.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has bookmarked:

I didn’t expect to have such strong feelings when the subtitles said “smooching” while the actors were kissing.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has copied:

Sometimes happiness is just having a good night’s sleep.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has copied:

In my retweeting era, because I’m just speechless.

Someone from 🇸🇦 has shared:

Mentally, I’m in a forest screaming. Physically, I’m answering emails with a fake smile and clenched jaw.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

236 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,505

Funny Quotes Topics

17,570

Funny Quotes Images

15,505

Updated

Jan 6, 2026

Users Online

3,478

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Threads:

Crying at my desk while also finding time to cry in the shower makes for a healthy work-life balance.

Just shared via Slack:

They’re selling me on Temu tomorrow.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

I did the math and a second job would help me get out of debt as long as I start it twelve years ago.

Seen just now on YouTube:

Why can’t periods just last for an hour? Like, you made your point, I’m not pregnant, you can leave now.

Making waves on Twitch:

You could go camping or you could stay at home, not shower, leave dirt on the floor and let some squirrels in.

Spreading quickly via X:

“Well at least I don’t have to wake up any more.” Is what I want my tombstone to say.

Making waves on Facebook:

I miss when you could touch a TV and feel its fur.

Just landed via Slack:

Bro, you gotta try this high-protein Caesar salad, cold brew, air fryer, overnight oats recipe I found on Instagram.

Broadcasted on Facebook:

I’ve decided to handle this like a mature adult, I’m telling your mom.

Going bananas on YouTube:

If at first you don’t succeed, try two more times so your failure is statistically significant.

Don’t believe in yourself, you can’t do it.

2 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Finally, a motivational speech my lazy self can get behind! 😅🙌"

believe, encouragement, humor, irony, motivation, negative, negative thinking, sarcasm, self-doubt, thinking, yourself

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Karma not moving fast enough for me. I would hate to handle it myself, Lord.

0

2 months ago

fast, handle, hate, humor, i, karma, lord, me, patience, timing
I’m not alone. I have ants.

0

2 months ago

alone, ants, companionship, humor, i, loneliness, nature, pets, quirky
Your card declining when you know you have money is a very funny experience.

0

5 months ago

banking, card, decline, embarrassment, experience, finance, Funny, funny experience, humor, know, money, payment
I made you snort laugh, so we’re going out, right?

0

5 months ago

date, flirting, going, humor, i, interaction, laugh, laughter, relationship, right, snort, snort laugh, social, social interaction
My New Year’s resolution is to be less presumptuous and rude to others. I’ll bet yours is to lose weight, isn’t it?

0

2 days ago

bet, humor, less, lose, loss, new, New Year’s resolution, others, presumption, resolution, rude, rudeness, sarcasm, weight, weight loss, year’s, yours
I love how all the Black Friday deals this year are just the price of the item before the tariffs.

0

1 month ago

before, black, Black Friday, consumer, deal, deals, discount, Friday, humor, i, item, just, love, price, sale, shopping, tariff, tariffs, year

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

57 shares on YouTube this month:

Cheesecake dislikers are attention seekers.

80 shares on WhatsApp this month:

If you would just let me help, you’d be in an even worse position than you are now.

82 shares on YouTube this month:

There should be a true crime story about feeding someone a peanut butter sandwich and giving them nothing to drink.

82 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I don’t understand why my husband has to pay for a UFC fight when he could just throw one piece of candy on the floor in front of our kids.

14 shares on Instagram this month:

Apparently I’m the reason why I never have any money. I am shocked!

24 shares on YouTube this month:

I wish I loved exercising as much as I love not exercising.

81 shares on Messenger this month:

What part of “I don’t want to spend any more money” don’t I understand?

84 shares on Messenger this month:

Hand sanitizer will find a cut you didn’t even know you had.

79 shares on Instagram this month:

I just ate, and now I’m going swimming, so I guess this is goodbye.

52 shares on TikTok this month:

Maybe aliens don’t visit us because they’re all women and they want us to make the first move.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇬 has copied:

I’m not easily offended, but I am easily annoyed.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has bookmarked:

I’m at the age where I understand that paying a little extra for convenience and comfort is absolutely okay.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has bookmarked:

How to have flat stomach: remove all of your organs.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has downloaded:

Who decided that “microwaves that beep forever” was a feature we needed.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has bookmarked:

Now hush, Lil Labubu, don’t you cry, everything’s gonna be Dubai.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has copied:

The Sunday struggle is wanting to relax and wanting a clean house, but also not wanting to clean or move.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has bookmarked:

Viewing someone’s LinkedIn after they’ve viewed yours to assert dominance.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has copied:

I identify as Michael Jackson, so my pronouns are “he/hee.”

Someone from 🇰🇳 has copied:

It’s a good thing that our phones only convey sight and sound. No offense, but from most of you I would never want to receive a smelfie!

Someone from 🇨🇳 has copied:

The feminine urge to turn you on and not do anything about it.

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on Messenger:

Even worse than the buzzing of the mosquitoes is the moment when it suddenly stops.

Seen just now on Discord:

All these microplastics in me could at least do some repair work to my knees and back while they’re in there.

Making waves on Twitch:

Welcome to your 50s… you can now fall asleep sitting up on the couch at any given moment.

Trending via Instagram:

My one cat vomited her dinner and then the other cat went in and started eating it. And that, my friends, is what ChatGPT is to me.

Trending via Slack:

Pets can’t talk but everyone loves them. This is not a coincidence.

Freshly posted on Slack:

I wonder how biology explains that pain in your chest you get when you found out your partner cheated on you.

Breaking via Facebook:

Imagine you and me as cows in Switzerland, enjoying the view and saying “moo” every day.

Breaking via TikTok:

Bro, you will never rewatch that 7-minute video you took of fireworks. Just live in the moment.

Shared recently on Slack:

I’m nearly qualified to be a weaver. My final exam is looming.

Going bananas on Pinterest:

I get sad whenever they’re mean to Zoidberg in Futurama.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Don’t believe in yourself, you can’t do it.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Karma not moving fast enough for me. I would hate to handle it myself, Lord.

I’m not alone. I have ants.

Your card declining when you know you have money is a very funny experience.

I made you snort laugh, so we’re going out, right?

My New Year’s resolution is to be less presumptuous and rude to others. I’ll bet yours is to lose weight, isn’t it?

I love how all the Black Friday deals this year are just the price of the item before the tariffs.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨