Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • Salsa counts as a serving of vegetables, right?
  • You are what you eat! (If anyone needed more encouragement to eat the rich.)
  • Why do moths eat sweaters? Have they tried sandwiches or avocados?
  • I had the most impatient and rudest cashier. I’m never using self-checkout again.
  • Asking the waiter for her phone number and then texting her “can I have more coffee?” two minutes later.
  • Someone needs to invent a kid that listens the first time.