Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Elliott's priorities were crystal clear: Forget the extraterrestrial heart-to-hearts, just hand over the keys to the bike! 🚲👽 #FlyingBikeDreams"

adventure, bike, care, childhood, E.T., Elliott, ET, flying, flying bike, fun, just, movie, movie reference, reference, wanted

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Welcome to your late 40s! From now on you will no longer be in “good health” but in “good health for your age”.

1 month ago

40s, acceptance, age, aging, good, good health, health, humor, late, late 40s, life, life stages, longer, stages, welcome
Bringing a fitted sheet to a knife fight.

1 month ago

absurdity, conflict, fight, fitted, fitted sheet, humor, irony, knife, knife fight, preparation, sheet, unexpected
Sometimes I think about Adam and Eve and how they couldn’t even get a babysitter.

1 month ago

Adam, babysitter, biblical, eve, even, humor, i, irony, parenting, sometimes, think
I overthink, therefore I am.

1 month ago

am, existence, humor, i, identity, irony, overthink, philosophy, self-reflection, thought
Why hasn’t Lululemon created a bra-line named Lulumelons?

1 month ago

bra, branding, fashion, humor, Lululemon, melons, why
I get so flattered when butterflies or bees buzz around me. Like, sorry ladies, I’m not a flower, but it’s so sweet that you thought I was. Hehe.

1 month ago

around, bee, bees, butterfly, buzz, compliment, flattery, flower, humor, i, me, nature, playful, sorry, sweet, thought

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇾 has copied:

Instead of screaming into the void, I’m going to ask it for recipes.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has bookmarked:

Everyone is getting pregnant or married, and I’m back to “What’s your favorite color?“

Someone from 🇧🇴 has shared:

I would like to have the peace of mind of a cow. I already have the body.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has bookmarked:

“Alcohol and beautiful women” is apparently not an appropriate answer when you are asked about your weaknesses in a job interview.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has viewed:

Justice is a dish best served cold. If it were served warm, it would be just water.

Someone from 🇧🇪 has bookmarked:

Does anyone know the password to my work computer? Or how to do my job?

Someone from 🇬🇶 has shared:

The only thing I don’t miss about the 90s is people smelling like cigarettes.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via X:

I have to work because the baby is expensive. (I’m the baby.)

Seen just now on Snapchat:

Nobody victim blames more than my oldest son when he’s in trouble for punching his little brother.

Live now on Discord:

It’s quite ironic that “strap on,” backwards, spells “no parts.”

Broadcasted on YouTube:

For Valentine’s Day, I’m gift-wrapping a shirt my husband hasn’t worn in years. It’s the thought that counts—and technically, I thought of it twice.

Spotted on YouTube:

Dear ghosts, if you can move stuff around and flicker lights, then you can use a mop.

Trending via Pinterest:

I need to be more disciplined and stop procrastinating, starting tomorrow.

Spotted on Telegram:

I don’t know much about women, but they love containers that hold smaller containers.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Elliott didn’t care about E.T. He just wanted a flying bike.

Welcome to your late 40s! From now on you will no longer be in “good health” but in “good health for your age”.

Bringing a fitted sheet to a knife fight.

Sometimes I think about Adam and Eve and how they couldn’t even get a babysitter.

I overthink, therefore I am.

Why hasn’t Lululemon created a bra-line named Lulumelons?

I get so flattered when butterflies or bees buzz around me. Like, sorry ladies, I’m not a flower, but it’s so sweet that you thought I was. Hehe.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

90% of the ocean is unexplored, which means there could be a McDonald’s down there.

I taped a picture of my paycheck on my front door to keep all the solicitors away.

Hello! I’m Britain’s greatest spy and my catchphrase is: I tell you my real surname, then my real forename, then my real surname again, in case you missed it.

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

I was going to cause mischief tonight, but I climbed into my bed instead.

“God has a plan for you.” OK, is God open to a little feedback?

Asking for a cigarette, then adding it to my own pack.

Reverse cowgirl because you made me mad, and I can’t even look at you right now.

One of the most disappointing things is when you get a severe thunderstorm warning, and there is no severe thunderstorm.

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Deodorant? No, I never need to buy any. People just give it to me. Complete strangers sometimes.

HR has told me to stop saying ‘How stupid can you be?’ to members of staff. They’re worried it’s being taken as a challenge.

My birthday wish is for everyone to ignore my birthday.

I’m so good at missing early morning meetings, I can do it with my eyes closed.

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

I’m getting close to that age where people applaud the things I’m “still able to do”.

Gonna start an app for cat sitters where they can review the cats they take care of and it’ll be called Litterboxd.

Jesus Christ. I haven’t seen a meltdown like that since Chernobyl.

I am staying up till a million o’clock tonight.

Activity Log ✨

Share Wordgag 🙏

Activity Log ✨

Elliott didn’t care about E.T. He just wanted a flying bike.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Welcome to your late 40s! From now on you will no longer be in “good health” but in “good health for your age”.

Bringing a fitted sheet to a knife fight.

Sometimes I think about Adam and Eve and how they couldn’t even get a babysitter.

I overthink, therefore I am.

Why hasn’t Lululemon created a bra-line named Lulumelons?

I get so flattered when butterflies or bees buzz around me. Like, sorry ladies, I’m not a flower, but it’s so sweet that you thought I was. Hehe.

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Share Wordgag 🙏