Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇯 has copied:

I’m not “dating to marry” or “dating for fun.” I’m dating for a secret third reason.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has downloaded:

Less is more, unless it’s kindness, sleep, or toilet paper.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has bookmarked:

I like the concept of restaurant appetizers: “Bring me something to eat. And bring me something else to eat while I’m waiting.”

Someone from 🇧🇴 has downloaded:

I like you so much, I’d actually learn your phone number.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has downloaded:

Turns out, “unc” is short for unconstitutional.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has copied:

If I go missing and you put my weight on that poster, I swear I’m not coming back.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has viewed:

Have you fallen in love with me yet, or do I need to post more nonsense?

Someone from 🇲🇷 has downloaded:

An introvert walked into a bar. Just kidding. The introvert stayed home.

Someone from 🇲🇹 has copied:

How do I even know this guy is my “boss”? I’ve just been taking his word for it.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has shared:

90% of the ocean is unexplored, which means there could be a McDonald’s down there.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,532

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on Facebook:

So sad. Elvis died before he could see the Lego movie. He woulda been like, ‘Mama, those blocks are movin’ and shakin.’

Just landed via TikTok:

I be outside telling people I don’t got social media when they ask.

Spreading quickly via Instagram:

“I need a movie where the villain actually won!” Have you tried watching the news?

Trending via YouTube:

Legos are too expensive nowadays. They should go back to costing as much as they did when my parents paid for them.

Going viral on Telegram:

I have a question and my question is, how can I look so cute in the mirror but like such a baked potato in pictures?

Live now on Instagram:

Good morning to everyone who doesn’t get on my nerves.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

You didn’t let me know you got home safely so you better at least be injured or I’m gonna be pissed.

Spotted on Facebook:

(Making small talk with a couple) So have you guys ever cheated on each other?

Going viral on Instagram:

The amount I’m sighing these days could fuel a small wind farm.

Making waves on Facebook:

At my funeral, sit me up so I can see who’s talking to my man.

Funny abusive quotes

New funny abusive quotes 👇

All funny abusive quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

26 shares on Threads this month:

Being weird never goes out of style.

55 shares on Pinterest this month:

Call me a glitch, cause I’m definitely messing with your system.

24 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I’m so jealous of people who live near a coastal area. What do you mean you can just go to the beach on a random Tuesday?

30 shares on X this month:

‘I have a ripe avocado at home’ is my favorite excuse for cancelling plans.

77 shares on Discord this month:

I will marry a tall, masculine, lovey-dovey man who can’t breathe when I ignore his existence.

63 shares on Reddit this month:

I wish I had a friend like me.

90 shares on Threads this month:

Messages are way funnier when you know how that person talks.

93 shares on Reddit this month:

I like deadlines. They make me functional.

63 shares on Reddit this month:

Cool times create cool guys.

10 shares on Facebook this month:

Get in loser, we’re going overthinking.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

17 folks are currently checking 👀

If you fall asleep long enough, the steering wheel gives you a pillow.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Elect a clown, expect a circus.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

Someday I will make a sandwich that will change my life forever.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

Every year I realize how dumb I was a year ago.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

The real body count is how many people are in therapy because of you.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

If i had $5 for every time I said up yours to someone, my butler would be saying it for me.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

Have y’all tried calories? They’re so good.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Grateful for independence mostly because British food is gross.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Nothing tastes as good as skinny feels.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

I’ve found God. It’s my turn to hide now.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,292

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇺🇬 has copied:

Checking a selfie only to find there’s a demon in the reflection behind you, and it looks significantly healthier than you.

Someone from 🇮🇳 has copied:

This is about the time of year where my enthusiasm about shoveling snow turns into “it will probably melt on it’s own”.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has copied:

People say 70-80 year olds are unemployable because of mental decline, yet somehow they’re running all the countries.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has shared:

They expect me to work at work.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has copied:

Women in movies look so beautiful when they sleep. Meanwhile, I’m tossing and turning all night like a forgotten 7-Eleven hot dog.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has bookmarked:

I’m a yapper. I’m a napper. I’m a midnight snacker.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has downloaded:

She didn’t leave you on read, bro. You left her on speechless.

Someone from 🇮🇶 has bookmarked:

I stay up late every night, regret it in the morning, and the next day I do it all over again.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has bookmarked:

Are you ever so happy to be in bed, you wish you could be even more in bed than you already are?

Someone from 🇹🇼 has viewed:

Text a co-worker at a random time “are you joining this meeting?” as a fun holiday prank.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via LinkedIn:

I am thinking of watching a movie with my boyfriend. Can anyone recommend a good boyfriend?

Just landed via Instagram:

The other day, I got the crazy idea to see if I could still do a cartwheel. I can’t.

Broadcasted on Telegram:

The house from Hansel and Gretel but made out of tacos.

Making waves on Reddit:

First rule for the new year is to not dwell on what went wrong this year.

Trending via WeChat:

Whenever I have a headache, I take 2 aspirin and keep away from children, just like it says on the bottle.

Shared recently on Discord:

Once you’ve been single for a long time, you realize how exhausting relationships can be.

Going bananas on Telegram:

My dog sets an impossible bar for how I should greet my wife when she comes home.

Live now on Threads:

I feel like this holiday season, it’s important to remind people of the true meaning of Christmas: ghosts terrorizing rich people in the middle of the night until they agree to pay their employees more.

Going viral on Discord:

You wear a white shirt and all of a sudden everybody wants to go eat spaghetti.

Going viral on Slack:

You guys can continue with the week, I’ve stopped here.

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