Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇲 has downloaded:

I only accept apologies in cash.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has viewed:

Hey girl, are you a burger? Because I love you.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has copied:

The tragedy of my life is that I theoretically know when I shouldn’t say anything. And then I hear myself talking.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has bookmarked:

I have no need to judge people because of their religion, skin color or sexual orientation. Bad behavior is enough for me.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has downloaded:

Dear Santa, I’ve been good all year. Most of the time. Once in a while. Never mind, I’ll buy my own stuff.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has downloaded:

I don’t know who needs to hear this, but you don’t need a special occasion to buy a cake.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has bookmarked:

Nobody defends billionaires better than dudes making $50,000 a year.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has copied:

I won’t be accepting any parcels for the neighbors in December this year. Last year it was all junk.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has viewed:

No, sorry, next week won’t work. I’ll be a shadow of what I once was.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has viewed:

Unfortunately, I do love being the only person who knows exactly what I mean and the hidden meaning behind everything I do.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

344 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,613

Funny Quotes Topics

17,663

Funny Quotes Images

15,613

Updated

Jan 12, 2026

Users Online

3,272

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Reddit:

“I’m interested in the divorce rate for couples who sleep in queen versus king beds.”

Seen just now on Telegram:

Putting my Christmas tree up today. Big day for my cats.

Breaking via YouTube:

Gnocchi: The small, chubby children of spaghetti and potatoes.

Making waves on TikTok:

I love coming home and being at home and sitting inside my home and staying home.

Making waves on Facebook:

Me, adding fuel to the fire: I’m just here to help.

Spotted on Slack:

Male birth control is free, and it’s called wearing Crocs with socks.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

There aren’t enough rap songs about cutting coupons.

Going viral on YouTube:

It’s almost bed time, so I’ll just check my e-mail, Twitter, Instagram, Facebook, and watch a season of my favorite show on Netflix real quick.

Just shared via Snapchat:

Looking forward to another year of crushing reality and unfulfilled dreams.

Going viral on Telegram:

Not to brag but I can chop an onion without crying. And I can cry without chopping an onion.

Funny ancient horror quotes

New funny ancient horror quotes 👇

Be the reason why a count unleashes ancient horrors onto the world when he thinks of you.

2 months ago

ancient, ancient horror, count, fun, horror, humor, reason, think, unleash, why, world

All funny ancient horror quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

85 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I wish men had sluttier outfit options. Because why am I in a mini skirt, and you’re in a quarter zip?

28 shares on WeChat this month:

A gentleman always straightens out the vending machine after shaking it.

51 shares on TikTok this month:

If you saw me licking the plate after the charcuterie was finished, no you didn’t.

30 shares on Instagram this month:

Actually, this email could’ve been a meeting. We could’ve spent an hour on the clock talking shit and gossiping. Someone could’ve brought bagels.

40 shares on YouTube this month:

I used to judge cat owners for giving in to their pets’ whims too easily, but holy shit, these animals are relentless and would starve themselves to organ failure just because one time, weeks ago, they had a taste of some ‘better’ food.

42 shares on Twitch this month:

My morning routine includes 10 minutes of sitting on my bed and thinking about how tired I am.

14 shares on Threads this month:

The secret to being a private person is to overshare dumb shit so people think you are an open book but then not tell them any of the important details of your life.

39 shares on X this month:

What are y’all gonna do when those labubus come to life and start biting y’alls ankles?

18 shares on Instagram this month:

Laying next to my charger waiting for my phone to die, that’s how lazy I am.

13 shares on Pinterest this month:

The most unrealistic part of Christmas movies isn’t the existence of Santa… it’s that all these people have, like, a month off work with no interruptions.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇭🇳 has viewed:

My summer body is just my winter body with better lighting.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has bookmarked:

People be like “I love your energy” – then drain it.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has copied:

Have you ever met someone and thought that you couldn’t wait to spend the rest of your life without them?

Someone from 🇧🇳 has viewed:

For the first time in history, you can simply post “He’s an idiot” and 90% of the world will know whom you’re talking about.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has copied:

They should invent health insurance that insures your health.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has shared:

My toxic trait is treating my glasses like they’re not the most expensive thing I wear everyday.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has copied:

I wish men had sluttier outfit options. Because why am I in a mini skirt, and you’re in a quarter zip?

Someone from 🇵🇰 has copied:

Dance like nobody’s watching, except God, the NSA, and Santa Claus.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has shared:

If you think you’re going to be in a dangerous situation, dress accordingly. Don’t wear flip-flops to a bank robbery, for example.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has downloaded:

Friends come and go, like the waves of the ocean, but the true ones stay like an octopus on your face.

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Threads:

Ribbed condoms don’t even taste like ribs.

Live now on WeChat:

I don’t know how to flirt, but you can watch me eat fresh fruit in my sundress.

Just landed via Messenger:

I really love how squirrels get extra chubby heading into winter mostly because it’s super relatable.

Shared recently on Threads:

Petition to lower the retirement age. I’m tired now.

Breaking via Instagram:

I want to live in a world where TV sitcoms have catchy theme songs again.

Live now on Slack:

It’s healthy to be a little insane sometimes.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

Italy stands for I Truly Always Love You.

Making waves on Threads:

Do you ever feel like you’re a white shirt and life is a red wine?

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

Hey, sorry I acted weird the other day. I was trying so hard to act normal that it backfired.

Shared recently on Reddit:

They say every snowflake is different, as if someone actually checked them.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Funny ancient horror quotes

New funny ancient horror quotes 👇

Be the reason why a count unleashes ancient horrors onto the world when he thinks of you.

All funny ancient horror quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨