Commentary:
Odysseus' definition of "on my way" clearly involved detours, giants, and a decade-long traffic jam 😂🗺️⏳
22 Funny ancient quotes
I saw someone say, “No spoilers for The Odyssey.” Brother, you’ve had 3,000 years to read the book.
Commentary:
Odysseus himself got home faster than you’ve read it! 📖⏳
My body is a temple. An ancient, creaky temple with questionable plumbing.
Commentary:
When my body requires renovations, it involves more yoga and less duct tape 😂🏛️🛠️
A guy waited exactly 3 days to text me. Someone’s been studying the ancient scrolls of 1980s dating advice.
Commentary:
Looks like he's mastering the lost art of waiting! Next, he'll be sending messages by pigeon 🕊️📜😂
You were promised to me 3,000 years ago.
Commentary:
I guess that makes me fashionably late—time definitely lost my RSVP! ⏳😂
Please leave me alone. I’m just a 3,000-year-old time-traveling alien who is trying to return to his home planet.
Commentary:
So that's why you always know when the coffee is brewing 😄👽🛸
Coke tastes like tapping into your ancient ancestral petroleum reserves, while Sprite tastes like being connected to a big, beautiful energy grid.
Commentary:
Sounds like Coke is my inner caveman's choice, but Sprite makes me feel like I'm solar-powered! 🌞🦖🔋
Since I started following the wisdom of ancient Chinese philosopher Fuk Yu, my life has been so much better…
Commentary:
Following the teachings of Master Fuk Yu: because sometimes, a little ancient wisdom goes a long way (especially in rush hour traffic)! 😂🚗💬
I wish more modern politics were about trying to stop the fulfillment of an ancient prophecy.
Commentary:
"Honestly, I'm ready for politicians to say, 'The oracle has spoken!' instead of 'The polls have spoken.' 🧙♂️🔮🤣"
Oh great, you brought your ancient ancestors with you.
Commentary:
"Wow, I didn’t realize it was a bring-your-own-mummies kind of party! 🎉🧟♂️🤣"