Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇹 has bookmarked:

I love when my friends have quiet boyfriends. Like, girl, your dog is so good, sis.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has viewed:

I get it, credit cards, I’ve reached my limit too.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has bookmarked:

The quickest way to get your kid to do their homework is to ask them to help with some chores.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has downloaded:

Saw someone from high school. She said she hadn’t seen me in years. That’s likely because I’d always seen her first.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has shared:

I never judge a book by its cover. People, though, I can tell are evil by their stupid faces.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has copied:

Home: Where I can look ugly and not care.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has viewed:

THRILLED to announce I did an Ironman this weekend! Attended 3 social gatherings in 3 days.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has bookmarked:

A delivery driver just asked for my date of birth. I said, “94.” He replied, “Is that 1994?” Oh, sorry mate, no. My bad, that was 1794. Right around the French Revolution.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has viewed:

Do married people watch Gen Z dating and feel like they caught the last chopper out of Nam?

Someone from 🇸🇦 has bookmarked:

Moving houses/apartments gotta be top 3 worst human experiences.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,584

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via Slack:

I want to be a garbage man, so I only have to work one day a week.

Making waves on Twitch:

The prettier you are, the weirder it gets.

Spreading quickly via WhatsApp:

Welcome to my very loose interpretation of ‘functioning adult’.

Just shared via Discord:

“New recipe” is code for “less content, but worse ingredients”.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

Thought you guys should know this was only Monday. It’s also still Monday.

Live now on Telegram:

GTA6 should have streams and wetlands so we can work to conserve and restore them.

Going viral on Discord:

Self-cleaning conscience.

Making waves on WeChat:

The elderberry is the wisest and most knowledgeable of all the berries.

Spotted on TikTok:

Welcome to your 40’s. You now have a favorite vegetable peeler.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

“Twister 3” should be told from a cow’s POV.

Funny cassette tape quotes

Funny cassette tape quotes 🎶📼 bring a hilarious blast from the past, reminding us of tangled tapes, rewind battles, and mixtape magic! Whether you grew up in the era of click-and-play or just love vintage vibes, these witty sayings add a nostalgic twist with a smile 😄✨. Get ready to laugh and rewind your memories with humor that’s totally on tape! #RetroFeels #CassetteComedy

New funny cassette tape quotes 👇

All funny cassette tape quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

15 shares on Instagram this month:

Withholding sex from you people isn’t working.

73 shares on Reddit this month:

Today, I want to talk about underperforming continents. Antarctica, explain yourself.

18 shares on Reddit this month:

Before social media, you could just completely forget that somebody existed. Good times.

68 shares on Discord this month:

Time to put the stressful screen away (phone) and switch to the comfort screen (Kindle).

18 shares on Discord this month:

If I don’t reply, assume I opened your message, nodded, and then got distracted.

88 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Not me out here checking the growth progress of my potted flowers only a couple hours after I planted the seeds in the first place.

21 shares on TikTok this month:

Managers want a week of silence and meditation in order to be even more of a manager afterwards.

29 shares on WeChat this month:

Nobody ever talks about how Sodom and Gomorrah were walkable cities.

73 shares on Pinterest this month:

Babe, are you okay? You haven’t touched your dark humor all day.

27 shares on X this month:

Welcome to adulthood: 9pm is midnight now.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

18 folks are currently checking 👀

I would like to unsubscribe from all responsibilities, please and thank you.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

“Are you dating anyone?” I close my eyes when I walk past mirrors.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

Welcome to your 40s, where the hair shows up uninvited and looks pissed to be here.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

Why do fruit flies be everywhere but at the supermarket? Ain’t that like their Golden Corral?

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Not my room, not my elephant.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

When I take a shower I’m: 5% cleaning myself, 10% singing, 85% making life changing decisions.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

This whole week could have been an email.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

My showers take so long because I always hold a shower concert.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

If overthinking burned calories, I’d never need to exercise again.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

“Communism sounds good in theory, but doesn’t work in practice.” Capitalism doesn’t even sound good in theory.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,710

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇩 has viewed:

Pitching a sitcom where all the top people running a major city have been arrested and by chain of command the person in charge is now a librarian.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has shared:

Unfortunately for things, they have no choice but to work out for me.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has shared:

Why can’t men just call you pretty without wording it uncomfortably?

Someone from 🇸🇿 has bookmarked:

Passive income? Brothers, I need massive income.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has viewed:

Wishing all the contacts in my phone “Merry Christmas, I hope you get what you deserve” and just letting that work itself out.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has shared:

After cooking show a dishwashing show with same host but kind of drunk.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has shared:

“Are you single?” No, I’m in a hallucinationship.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has copied:

I don’t care for the term drug mule, why can’t it be a drug unicorn.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has copied:

They monitor me harder than Britney Spears around here.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has downloaded:

Why is it called “free time” when I use it to spend all my money?

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on WhatsApp:

OnlyFans, but it’s elderly women teaching you how to sew, knit, can food, quilt, and some solid recipes. OnlyGrans.

Making waves on Threads:

Not to brag, but I was unhinged way before it was cool.

Trending via LinkedIn:

I am cassette tape years old.

Making waves on WeChat:

What do you mean I never reach out? I literally thought about you.

Just landed via YouTube:

Have a good weekend, unless you have other plans.

Breaking via YouTube:

Relationship status: my sex robot filed a restraining order.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

I have had songs stuck in my head and I have had people stuck in my head, I highly recommend songs.

Trending via Threads:

Flies are literally obsessed with flying into a room, then pretending they can’t get out. Grow up.

Just landed via Pinterest:

Every triangle is a love triangle when you love triangles.

Broadcasted on Instagram:

The word aerobics comes from two Greek words: aero, meaning “ability to,” and bics, meaning “withstand tremedous boredom.”

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