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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇽 has copied:

You know you’re a bad cook when the dog won’t lick the plate.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has copied:

Let’s skip the getting-to-know-you phase. Just block me.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has viewed:

They should invent someone who holds me.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has viewed:

If I text you at 8:10, you’re supposed to reply at 8:09.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has shared:

My dog just tracked and successfully located a folium lanceolatum, more commonly known as a leaf.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has downloaded:

Whenever you are feeling down, remember you’re the sperm that won.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has bookmarked:

My favorite exercise is a combination of a lunge and a crunch. It’s called lunch.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has shared:

As you get older, you suddenly realize that the Smurf who hates everything is the normal one.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has shared:

My kid’s superpower is knowing he won’t like a food before he even tries it.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has downloaded:

If you knock down a policeman, they’ll get backup.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2333 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,495

Funny Quotes Topics

15,196

Funny Quotes Images

12,495

Updated

44 minutes ago

Users Online

3,450

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Facebook:

Any room can be an escape room when you have diarrhea.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

9am: anything is possible. 2pm: maybe tomorrow.

Making waves on YouTube:

There are too many movies about vampire hunters and not enough about vampire gatherers.

Spotted on WeChat:

Be the nonsense you wish to see in the world.

Just shared via Facebook:

I think it’s time when we buy new clothes that we have the option to buy the body they’re being modelled in too.

Shared recently on Threads:

Insomniacs who are not afraid of the dark have nighty-night problems but the pitch ain’t one.

Breaking via YouTube:

We could all be hibernating right now but noooooo we have to be “adults” with “responsibilities”.

Making waves on Pinterest:

I’m at the “buy bigger jeans” part of my Eat. Pray. Love. journey.

Spotted on TikTok:

Rorschach tests are like so easy. Everything’s either a demon or a butterfly and it’s up to you to decide.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

We’ve got a shituation here.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2333 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,495

Funny Quotes Topics

15,196

Funny Quotes Images

12,495

Updated

44 minutes ago

Users Online

3,447

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇲 has bookmarked:

I’ve discovered I have a logic fetish, I just can’t stop coming to conclusions.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has downloaded:

I keep myself humble by messing up all the time.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has downloaded:

I was so excited thinking tomorrow was Friday only to find out it is definitely not Friday.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has downloaded:

Do you also watch porn until the end to see if they end up getting married?

Someone from 🇳🇱 has downloaded:

Eating rice with my hands, but not in a political way. In a lazy, fat guy way.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has viewed:

When the blood pressure machine comes out for one person, the whole family has to get involved.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has copied:

It’s always annoying to be woken up by some guy mowing his lawn. Just go around me, man.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has shared:

Love how you can hear the crowd constantly forgetting the queen died and singing “God save the Quing”

Someone from 🇪🇪 has copied:

You ever go to a baseball game and hear a guy yelling, “hot dogs! hot dogs!” over and over again? That’s me, looking for hot dogs.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has viewed:

You gotta separate the art from the artist. Like, for example, sometimes the artist is really nice but their art sucks.

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via YouTube:

“You shouldn’t let your cat jump on the counter”, my cat could take out a loan in my name if he wanted to.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

People believe that they have brains but maybe that’s just inside their heads.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

“Where did all your money go?” I’m either wearing it or eating it.

Spotted on TikTok:

When my wife packs for a trip she basically moves out.

Seen just now on WeChat:

The perfect job for me would be the person staining things for detergent commercials.

Just landed via Discord:

You may find my attraction to Goofy weird, but I don’t give a hyuck.

Spotted on WeChat:

I hope whoever came up with the spelling for Wednesday was punished for their actions.

Just shared via Discord:

Money enters like Beyoncé and exits like Britney.

Just shared via Reddit:

I’ve never met a problem I couldn’t make worse.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

It’s true that I’ve been through the desert on a horse with no name, but for my return trip, I rented a camel named Carl.

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