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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇿 has downloaded:

A Twitter swear jar could end world hunger.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has copied:

I’ve heard that people who don’t have Facebook use their free time to lie naked on top of each other. Ew, imagine that.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has shared:

I miss the days when you could simply end a phone call by slamming the receiver down angrily.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has downloaded:

The highest act of rebellion is to relax unconditionally.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has copied:

Frodo is a beautiful name for a boy. Has a ring to it.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has viewed:

“Autophagy” would be a beautiful name for a girl.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has copied:

No matter what’s going on in your life, there’s some form of potato that can make it better.

Someone from 🇰🇭 has viewed:

Life is just a series of obstacles preventing you from reading your book.

Someone from 🇮🇱 has copied:

Once you turn 25 years and above, there is no need to set an alarm. Your problems will wake you up by force.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has viewed:

Women call me ugly until they find out how much money I make. Then they call me ugly and poor.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2249 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,411

Funny Quotes Topics

15,118

Funny Quotes Images

12,411

Updated

2 hours ago

Users Online

3,442

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on TikTok:

It’s too bad he never woke up and chose violence. “Bob Ross, mob boss” has a nice ring to it.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

Dating someone from Twitter is like choosing your spouse from a mental hospital.

Spotted on Slack:

“Excuse me, are you gonna finish those fries?” Me, interrupting a couple fighting.

Broadcasted on Reddit:

Wish my metabolism worked as fast as my anxiety.

Reported on Discord:

I can’t believe I slept good all night. What a rush.

Making waves on Facebook:

Nothing says “not interested” quite like a Restraining Order.

Making waves on TikTok:

Old age is like a glorious, extended long weekend, but you always know Monday’s coming.

Shared recently on X:

Welcome to your 40’s: you have big plans tonight. No, you don’t.

Spotted on YouTube:

Just got my test results back and my cholesterol level is a cheese bratwurst.

Making waves on Discord:

Japan’s greatest tragedy is having the world’s best toilets and no Mexican food. What’s the point of owning a Ferrari if you never take it to the track?

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2249 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,411

Funny Quotes Topics

15,118

Funny Quotes Images

12,411

Updated

2 hours ago

Users Online

3,453

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

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Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇪 has downloaded:

I feel like we’re all just angry and horny.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has downloaded:

I bought some coconut shampoo today. I got halfway home before I thought, “I don’t even have a coconut!”

Someone from 🇮🇳 has bookmarked:

Have you ever met the human version of a headache?

Someone from 🇧🇩 has bookmarked:

Convinced my kid her harmonica didn’t work because the instructions were missing.

Someone from 🇨🇿 has shared:

I’m not a dietitian, but if you eat pizza right at midnight your body doesn’t know if the calories go towards yesterday or today so they don’t count.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has viewed:

Job interview: Where do you see yourself in five years? Me: Hopefully on a sabbatical.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has shared:

Grant me the serenity to supernaturally change the things I cannot accept.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has shared:

“Would you like to check your account balance?” God no. My balance is none of my business.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has viewed:

The first time I see a jogger smiling, I’ll consider it.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has shared:

Ground beef implies the existence of sky beef.

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via Facebook:

Seeking a date so intense even the candles are sweating.

Just shared via Instagram:

Unpopular opinion: The moon is actually way more useful than the sun. Because the moon gives us light at night when it’s dark. The sun only gives us light during the day when it’s already bright.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

In a massage chair at the mall just moaning really loud.

Live now on TikTok:

I took your advice and worked smarter not harder. Now I’m going to need your advice on a good lawyer.

Trending via Pinterest:

Me: I’m an introvert. Vodka: No, you’re not.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

Nothing says sexy like a pair of sensible, silky polka dot PJs.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

I didn’t really mind the voices in my head until one of them started their own podcast.

Breaking via WhatsApp:

Grocery stores should have baskets in the middle of the store for those “I really overestimated how much I can carry” moments.

Going viral on Slack:

My girlfriend? You wouldn’t know her, she’s in a different data center.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

Normalize responding to work emails with: “What the hell are you talking about?”

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