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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇭 has bookmarked:

The part right before bench pressing when you’re laying down but not lifting is so good.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has viewed:

If you’re not easily offended, why are you even online?

Someone from 🇬🇦 has copied:

Girls expect handwritten letters from guys who copy birthday wishes from ChatGPT.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has bookmarked:

I like riding by myself so I can replay 1 song 111 times with no complaints.

Someone from 🇪🇸 has copied:

Most people in your life will come and go but occasionally you’ll meet someone really special who makes you contemplate murder.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has viewed:

I don’t understand all the fuss about ChatGPT – I have teenagers who already know everything.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has downloaded:

Think about how many more lovers you’d have if a cross country high-speed rail existed. That’s what they are taking away from you.

Someone from 🇧🇬 has copied:

The healthy food in my fridge should be grateful really. It survives much longer than everything else.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has bookmarked:

Kids today will never understand how many ninjas there were in the 1980s.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has copied:

If lying was a job some people would be billionaires.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

766 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,928

Funny Quotes Topics

13,901

Funny Quotes Images

10,928

2 hours ago

3,446

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on Facebook:

I love Fleetwood Mac, but “thunder only happens when it’s raining” is just not true.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

Happy Earth Day. You don’t look a day over 4 billion years and get hotter every year.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

Іf you’re sad about being alone on Valentine’s Day, just remember that nobody loves you on any other day of the year either.

Shared recently on WeChat:

The sole purpose of your child’s middle name… is so they know when they’re really in trouble.

Just shared via Instagram:

Insomnia sharpens your math skills because you spend all night calculating how much sleep you’ll get if you’re able to ‘fall asleep right now.’

Making waves on Telegram:

I need a room full of mirrors, so I can be surrounded by losers.

Just landed via Discord:

Why have abs when you can have kebabs?

Spotted on Reddit:

Fun like a LinkedIn notification.

Trending via Telegram:

“Thug life,” I whisper to myself as I check out my sunglasses in the mirror.

Going viral on YouTube:

Watched Titanic for the 14th time. Still sobbing. Still yelling, “SCOOT OVER, COW!” like it’ll change the ending.

Home » Funny Deflect Quotes

Funny deflect quotes

New funny deflect quotes 👇

5 months ago
Share →: Starting your most incoherent sentence with “put simply” to deflect blame onto the reader.

Commentary:
"Using 'put simply' before your most nonsensical ramblings is like wrapping a clown costume around a broken logic train 🤡🚂. It's the ultimate blame-shifting move – 'Oops, I guess you just didn't get my jumbled mess of words, not my fault! 🤷‍♂️🤪'."

For even more funny deflect quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny deflect quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

766 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,928

Funny Quotes Topics

13,901

Funny Quotes Images

10,928

2 hours ago

3,437

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇻 has bookmarked:

I was very disappointed when I found out drinking alcohol doesn’t actually kill brain cells, I was hoping to join a political party one day.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has shared:

My longest relationship has been with my Hotmail account.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has downloaded:

Jump to recipe is the closest thing we have to teleportation.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has downloaded:

Buying a new phone isn’t even satisfying anymore. It’s literally just your old phone with a haircut.

Someone from 🇵🇱 has bookmarked:

What electric cars and diarrhea have in common is the fear of not making it home.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has shared:

Aura is the real business card.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has shared:

I want to be so rich that when I see a spider in my house I won’t kill it, I’d buy another house.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has bookmarked:

My wife and I always eat dinner as fast as possible so we can have a popsicle.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has downloaded:

Did you guys know that you can actually do whatever you want all the time?

Someone from 🇩🇲 has viewed:

Actually, it’s illegal to be upset if you make a date on Halloween and they ghost you.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on YouTube:

Never miss a good chance to shut up.

Breaking via Twitch:

Every citizen over 18 should be eligible to be drafted into the Postal Service.

Just shared via Pinterest:

The only reason I’d want to go to heaven is to complain to the manager.

Shared recently on Reddit:

There’s a disgusting pervert at the bar watching pornography over my shoulder.

Just landed via Instagram:

“Love is in the air.” Wrong. Microplastics.

Spotted on WeChat:

Lou Read is the name of my favorite musician and also the book I keep in the toilet.

Broadcasted on Discord:

My favorite body lotion is Voltaren.

Just landed via Instagram:

Happiness is when you really have nothing to do with people you want absolutely nothing to do with.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

People are too casual about the fact that parrots can talk.

Shared recently on Threads:

Every homemade dinner counts as negative calories because of the exercise we get waving pillows at the smoke detectors.

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