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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇲 has copied:

Inventor of pink lemonade: yes, exactly the same, but cute and for the girls.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has bookmarked:

Lying to stupid people can give you a profound sense of satisfaction, it can also make you president.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has copied:

I miss being a kid. Nobody asks what my favorite dinosaur is anymore.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has copied:

My children are very helpful. For example, when I ask them to do something, they suggest a different child that could do it instead.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has viewed:

The next time someone texts me “we need to talk,” I’ll reply, “Yes, we really need to talk,” so that I won’t be the only one stressing.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has copied:

Whoever’s been in charge of the weather for the last few weeks seems to have fallen asleep on the couch with the remote control in their hand.

Someone from 🇹🇬 has downloaded:

There’s a guy who thinks he’s going to Yale, but it’s jail.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has viewed:

Don’t date coworkers. Being the hot coworker nobody at work has a chance with is always the best role to play.

Someone from 🇲🇳 has downloaded:

People always talk about how they love to sit in their cars for a while once they get home. Whenever I do that, my Uber driver yells at me.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has viewed:

I lost my appetite for doing work. If you find it, you can keep it.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2326 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,488

Funny Quotes Topics

15,192

Funny Quotes Images

12,488

Updated

58 minutes ago

Users Online

3,457

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on TikTok:

What kind of psychopath wants to be the life of the party?

Making waves on Messenger:

“Have AI summarize this email for you!” No thanks, I can read what the person actually said in the way they intended.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

Everyone is always talking about raising money for dogs without homes, but what about the ones who don’t have cars?

Shared recently on Instagram:

I be having full arguments in my head, then walk around mad like someone actually said something to me.

Just landed via Facebook:

What I want for dinner hasn’t been invented yet.

Just landed via Slack:

Everybody thinks “Free Hugs” signs are cute, unless you’re a boa constrictor.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

You’re so cultured I’mma start calling you Yogurt.

Making waves on LinkedIn:

Childbirth seems like an awful lot of work for an already saturated market.

Seen just now on X:

Before borrowing money from a friend, decide which you need most.

Just shared via Discord:

Not to brag but I gave someone directions and he made it.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2326 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,488

Funny Quotes Topics

15,192

Funny Quotes Images

12,488

Updated

58 minutes ago

Users Online

3,446

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

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Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇭 has viewed:

All my passwords are protected, by my poor memory.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has bookmarked:

Can someone come over and take this phone away from me?

Someone from 🇧🇬 has copied:

My favorite Slipknot member is the one who wears the mask.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has shared:

Welcome to downtown where the crosswalk signals are merely suggestions and you hope the puddles are water.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has copied:

Everything I like is either expensive, illegal, or wont text me back.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has bookmarked:

If a baby comes out feet first, technically it wears its mom as a hat.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has copied:

I made a clone of myself to do the dishes, another to do the laundry, and another to do the cooking, but we’re all sitting on the couch watching TV.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has shared:

Sometimes I wish I understood what some of you said and sometimes I am happy that I don’t.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has copied:

“No idea” doesn’t mean I don’t know the answer. I just don’t want to have a conversation.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has downloaded:

Dude, we’re biting off more than we can chew tonight if you want to pull up.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

I made up all these romantic scenarios in my brain and you’re not following the script.

Spreading quickly via Threads:

TV lead me to believe grave digging would be a lot easier.

Breaking via Discord:

A garlic a day keeps people away.

Trending via Threads:

It’s awkward touching hands with another man inside a popcorn bag, especially if you don’t know the man and he doesn’t know you’re eating his popcorn.

Live now on Messenger:

November is for turtlenecks and depression.

Spreading quickly via WhatsApp:

Airport beer at 6 a.m.? No problem. The airport is a lawless place that is free from judgment.

Making waves on TikTok:

Sorry I lied when I said “I can’t complain.”

Spotted on Slack:

I need a six-month vacation twice a year.

Shared recently on YouTube:

I’m still annoyed that you can catch Covid more than once. I can’t explain why, but it feels kind of rude.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

I don’t need alcohol to make bad decisions.

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