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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇦 has copied:

Banana boats are powered by bananas. Everyone knows this.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has downloaded:

Another Netflix price increase? Guess we’re only chilling now.

Someone from 🇱🇰 has downloaded:

Being an adult is when you ask the babysitter when you should be home.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has downloaded:

Wooden pews are designed to maximize the shame of farting in church.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has viewed:

A blind guy felt my face and said, “Wonderful.”

Someone from 🇿🇦 has viewed:

The best thing capitalism has done is put a little window on pasta boxes so the noodles can look out at the world.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has bookmarked:

Not to brag, but I finished an entire book in one sitting. I’m going to need some new crayons.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has copied:

I childproofed my house but the kids still get in somehow.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has copied:

Seeking a date so intense even the candles are sweating.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has bookmarked:

Body by sandwich.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

796 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,958

Funny Quotes Topics

13,929

Funny Quotes Images

10,958

Updated

21 minutes ago

Users Online

3,440

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Pinterest:

Any jar is a swear jar when the lid won’t open.

Seen just now on YouTube:

Zoom is really only for one thing: realizing our dream of staring at ourselves while talking to other people.

Just landed via Snapchat:

I was raised to be humble which I excel at cause I excel at everything.

Breaking via Snapchat:

Welcome to your late 40s! From now on you will no longer be in “good health” but in “good health for your age”.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

I can’t really explain it but cereal at night tastes better than cereal in the morning.

Trending via Pinterest:

Not using emoji while texting is my way to show that I’m serious.

Just shared via Reddit:

About to form my very first opinion.

Seen just now on Telegram:

My chess strategy is eating one of your pieces every time you look away.

Making waves on TikTok:

I briefly stepped away from social media to get an idea of what else is going on in the world. For instance, I didn’t realize I was still married.

Spotted on WeChat:

If I could go back in time, I’d probably stop Bruce Willis from saving us from that asteroid.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

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Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media need people procrastination relationship sarcasm social someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

796 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,958

Funny Quotes Topics

13,929

Funny Quotes Images

10,958

Updated

21 minutes ago

Users Online

3,440

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇦 has viewed:

The word abbreviation sure is long for what it means.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has shared:

The cynicism of those who urge me not to do what I can to help the Nigerian royal family.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has copied:

What’s the point of having sex dreams if you always wake up just when it’s getting down to business?

Someone from 🇸🇹 has downloaded:

Sorry, I’m late. I took a walk around the world to ease my troubled mind.

Someone from 🇨🇻 has bookmarked:

May your life one day be as beautiful as you portray it on social media.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has copied:

If I let you into my life, I am either emotionally invested or you are a grilled cheese sandwich.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has viewed:

One thing I love about the internet is seeing some of the most hateful people posting inspirational quotes.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has bookmarked:

Helvetica is my favorite font that sounds like a heavy metal band.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has bookmarked:

My day starts backwards, I wake up tired and I go to bed wide awake.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has downloaded:

It took three employees to help me complete “self-checkout” yesterday.

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Slack:

Gentle parenting is making sure your kids can’t hear what you say when you’re peeling a mango.

Just landed via Pinterest:

Most people don’t listen at all, they just wait until they can continue talking.

Seen just now on Facebook:

Less is more, unless it’s kindness, sleep, or toilet paper.

Just landed via YouTube:

I am awake and ready to be disappointed.

Trending via TikTok:

You come from dust and you will return to dust. That’s why I don’t dust. It could be someone I know.

Making waves on Twitch:

Girl talk is my favorite. You go from discussing goals to talking about shoes, to hating men, to planning a trip in six minutes.

Just shared via YouTube:

The worst part about borrowing money is having to pay it back or move to a new city.

Shared recently on Reddit:

It’s hard to believe that this long, crazy election will finally be over in a few months.

Shared recently on Facebook:

I’m not asking for a lot, I just want someone down to earth that’s gonna touch me all over like my shower curtain does.

Breaking via Threads:

We need a word for that weird feeling you get when you learn what a podcaster looks like.

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