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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇻🇪 has shared:

Humans are the only species that would cut down trees, make paper out of them, and then write “Save the Trees” on it.

Someone from 🇸🇲 has bookmarked:

If a woman watches a TV show alone, who answers all of her questions?

Someone from 🇸🇬 has copied:

Normalize saying “better you than me” to people who keep complaining about everything.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has copied:

Sometimes I feel useless, but then I remember I breathe out carbon dioxide for plants.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has shared:

Wouldn’t it be nice if you could donate your own body fat to those who need it more urgently?

Someone from 🇩🇴 has downloaded:

How do I get my glasses prescription placed in my windshield?

Someone from 🇫🇲 has viewed:

Vacation is a time when every part of you can relax except your bowels.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has viewed:

I hate when I go to the kitchen looking for food, and all I find is ingredients.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has bookmarked:

I don’t know how to mop my kitchen floor without pretending l’m cleaning up a gruesome crime scene.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has downloaded:

Washing my hands in the sink and then wiping them on my cat, like a towel.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,685

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Twitch:

Fun fact: The US was originally not meant to be a reality TV show.

Just landed via Snapchat:

This year is starting to feel like it needs to be left outside until we see if it can act right.

Live now on Discord:

Wake up, the thinking isn’t going to overthink itself.

Broadcasted on WeChat:

Tequila won’t fix your life, but it’s worth a shot.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

I’ll marry the person who can go to a family event with me and still like me afterward.

Spotted on Twitch:

You can be anything when you grow up. For instance, I am very tired.

Live now on WeChat:

I’ve got to start taking better care of myself. Tomorrow I’ll walk to the liquor store.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

Instead of being constantly irritated by other people’s flaws, I’ve decided to become more self-absorbed.

Shared recently on TikTok:

The way men eat when they’re single is nothing short of dehumanizing.

Seen just now on Messenger:

My dad once sneezed so hard that he set every clock back two hours.

Funny food industry quotes

Funny food industry quotes serve up a delicious mix of laughs and insights 🍔😂 Whether you’re a chef, foodie, or just love good eats, these witty bites will spice up your day 🌶️😄 From kitchen chaos to dining delights, get ready to savor humor that’s as tasty as your favorite dish 🍕🎉 Let’s dig in and feast on some seriously funny food biz moments! 🍩🍽️

New funny food industry quotes 👇

All funny food industry quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

90 shares on Pinterest this month:

Chasing after a ping pong ball is wildly dehumanizing.

46 shares on Threads this month:

My body is like my phone battery. Usually drained by 4pm.

33 shares on WeChat this month:

Y’all ever withheld good news so that it remains untouched by negativity?

39 shares on Slack this month:

Imagine hating me and I’m just here trying to push a door that says pull.

91 shares on Reddit this month:

Turns out I like you a lot more than I originally planned.

12 shares on Pinterest this month:

My body looks like I have a great personality.

68 shares on Facebook this month:

I’m no doctor but I’m pretty sure this Santa-shaped chocolate oughta settle my stomach.

88 shares on TikTok this month:

Bro, you gotta try this high-protein Caesar salad, cold brew, air fryer, overnight oats recipe I found on Instagram.

34 shares on X this month:

Some people are so fake, their lock screens don’t recognize them.

37 shares on LinkedIn this month:

My mother always told me, “If you don’t have anything nice to say, say nothing at all.” Needless to say, I’m not much of a conversationalist.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

8 folks are currently checking 👀

It’s exciting to receive a Valentine’s Day card and not know who it’s from. A Father’s Day card, not so much.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

Called off work. Feeling fat and wearing jeans.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Some days you feel like you’re surrounded by idiots, other days you realize it’s not just some days.

13 folks are currently checking 👀

Spider-Man, but set in rural England so he just has to walk everywhere.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

Smile like a monkey with a new banana.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

I love saying “exactly” to stuff that doesn’t make sense.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Where does everyone go to get kisses? I haven’t figured this out yet.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Roses are red, tacos are delicious. I use paper plates, ’cause I hate doing dishes.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Sex is so embarrassing. Like, why did I want to do that to you?

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Hi, where do you meet someone without dating apps and if you never leave your apartment? I need tips, please. Urgently!

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,704

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇼🇸 has bookmarked:

Sorry that I cannot come out drinking with you tonight, as I will be drinking at home. Alone. By myself.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has copied:

The man who invented autocorrect has died. Restaurant in peace.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has bookmarked:

Sundries sounds like something grandma would call scandalous underwear.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has bookmarked:

Some people buy shoes to feel alive. I buy boarding passes.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has copied:

Babe, are you okay? You’ve barely responded to my telepathic messages.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has viewed:

Making fun of bands that only play 3 chords when I don’t even know what a chord is.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has copied:

The older I get, the more I don’t want to do things.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has copied:

A bad relationship can ruin a good song.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has viewed:

Whoever said “out of sight out of mind” never lost a spider in the bedroom.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has viewed:

I just shaved my legs and man, the next 7 minutes and 34 seconds before it starts growing back is gonna feel amazing.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on TikTok:

Selfish people are my favorite because you never have to guess their motives.

Seen just now on Telegram:

I hate when people set alarms and it wakes up everybody except for them.

Spotted on X:

You seem really unhinged, we should grab coffee sometime.

Trending via Reddit:

When I die, I want to go peacefully like my grandfather did, in his sleep, not screaming, like the passengers in his car.

Breaking via Twitch:

I hate when I get ready too quickly and have to sit on the couch, fully dressed, and wait like an idiot.

Making waves on Pinterest:

I took the road less traveled because I was hoping not to run into anyone I know along the way.

Just landed via Snapchat:

My summer body is just my winter body with better lighting.

Going bananas on Snapchat:

Dear 8 hours of sleep, I miss you so much.

Just shared via Instagram:

My body’s check engine light has been on for years.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

When I say I’m saving myself for marriage, what I mean is you won’t know how annoying I am until it’s too late.

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