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10,000+ funny quotes

235 Funny fun activity quotes

I think we all need to go out into an empty field and just scream for about an hour.

2 weeks ago

I took my kids to the zoo when they were small, I wonder how they are getting on now.

2 weeks ago

Can’t believe we used to throw eggs at houses, and now we can afford neither eggs nor houses.

2 weeks ago

Taking Adderall before going to lay on the beach so I can focus more on having a good time.

2 weeks ago

Girls don’t actually shop. We just walk round touching the clothes saying ‘this is cute’.

2 weeks ago

Downloading the Titanic soundtrack. It’s syncing right now.

1 month ago

I only drink when I people.

1 month ago

Putting sunscreen on kids feels like cardio.

1 month ago

Every Sunday is superbowel if you eat enough chili.

1 month ago

If you are lonely, dim all lights and put on a horror movie. After a while it won’t feel like you are alone anymore.

1 month ago

Finally it’s Friday and I can go out. I’m putting the garbage out and I’ll be right back.

1 month ago

Terrible things can happen if you go camping. For starters, you could want to go camping again.

1 month ago

In my experience, bowling and pancakes have the same energy. High hopes at the beginning, lowered self-esteem at the end.

1 month ago

Shopping is the only exercise I need.

1 month ago

If you are lonely, dim all the lights and put on a horror movie. You won’t feel like you are lonely any more.

1 month ago

Going to a DaBaby concert because I need some alone time, and I know no one else will be there.

1 month ago

The key to happiness: 1/ order a pizza. 2/ eat that pizza. 3/ repeat!

1 month ago

Instead of cleaning my house, I just watch episodes of hoarders on TV and then I think “Wow, my house looks awesome!”

1 month ago

The marriage rate has been trending downward. Choreographed wedding dances may be the reason.

1 month ago

Since you’re all so in love, switch phones for Valentine’s Day!

1 month ago

Our parents just don’t know how far we rode the bikes when we were young.

1 month ago

Having a pool is so neat. All of your friends are suddenly interested to catch up on the hottest days of the year.

1 month ago

It’s legally required that you lose a frisbee onto the roof within one week of purchase.

1 month ago

My wife and I always eat dinner as fast as possible so we can have a popsicle.

1 month ago

A fun wedding bit is to sit next to a random guest, point to the bride or groom & whisper, “it should’ve been you”

1 month ago

Thinking about ignoring daily mess by creating new holiday decor mess.

1 month ago

Genuinely nothing worse than going bowling with people who are actually good. Like, why are you doing all that?

1 month ago

Women only want one thing and it is to walk down a dimly-lit cobblestone street with the devil.

1 month ago

Ask your doctor if it’s right for you to eat oranges and pretend they’re planets and you’re a Greek god.

1 month ago

If I like cleaning? Does Sisyphus like his boulder?

1 month ago