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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇩🇪 has downloaded:

Thinking about quitting my job to focus on my girlfriend.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has bookmarked:

They say we learn from our mistakes, that’s why I’m making as many as possible. Soon I’ll be a genius.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has viewed:

This whole working for a living thing goes on for how long?

Someone from 🇵🇱 has shared:

How can I be expected to get out of bed when I don’t want to?

Someone from 🇷🇼 has copied:

My new diet plan is to hibernate and live off all this fat I’ve accumulated.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has viewed:

Who knew that the hardest part of being an adult is figuring out what to cook for dinner every single night for the rest of your life.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has bookmarked:

Humming & dancing while I plop my meds into my weekly pill counter like the happy little nutcase I am.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has copied:

I won $6 on a scratch-off last night. Out of my way, peasants!

Someone from 🇹🇻 has copied:

The trick is to not let people know how weird you are until it’s too late for them to back out.

Someone from 🇹🇳 has bookmarked:

The quickest way to double your money is to hold it in front of a mirror.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2245 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,407

Funny Quotes Topics

15,114

Funny Quotes Images

12,407

Updated

50 minutes ago

Users Online

3,453

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on X:

I’ve realized that some people don’t like me, but I’ve also realized that I don’t give a shit.

Seen just now on TikTok:

Christmas combines two things I love the most, getting fat and lying to children.

Just shared via Facebook:

You only realize how heavy your handbag really is when your car tells you that your passenger is not wearing a seatbelt.

Broadcasted on Telegram:

Some woman is out there right now, pregnant with Leonardo DiCaprio’s next girlfriend.

Spotted on X:

Welcome to your 40s. Your bra wins the Oscar for the best actor in a supportive role.

Trending via TikTok:

Sometimes I think I should talk to my colleagues more often. Until I talk to my colleagues.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

I don’t have to take this abuse from you; I’ve got hundreds of people dying to abuse me.

Trending via LinkedIn:

If social media has taught me anything, it’s that we are all crazy in a different way.

Shared recently on Reddit:

God, never seen San Francisco this bad. Spiderwebs completely covering entire business, skeletons just strewn about sidewalks in every neighborhood. Things have got to change!

Spotted on Reddit:

The rain is pouring. So naturally it’s a good day to eat 6 donuts.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2245 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,407

Funny Quotes Topics

15,114

Funny Quotes Images

12,407

Updated

50 minutes ago

Users Online

3,447

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇩🇲 has downloaded:

I saw a bird get a worm today. It was about 11 am. So, don’t give up on your dreams, buddy!

Someone from 🇬🇲 has downloaded:

Hell hath no fury like a toddler who lost the chance to push a button.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has downloaded:

My family asked me what I wanted for Mother’s Day, so I packed their bags and changed the locks.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has copied:

We’re all in the billionaire submarine now.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has downloaded:

Tried counting sheep, but now I’m emotionally invested in their backstories and I think one might need therapy.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has viewed:

Pirate: walks the plank. Someone’s dad: Is this teak?

Someone from 🇬🇦 has shared:

I don’t care what other people think of me, at least mosquitoes find me attractive.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has copied:

Tomorrow isn’t promised, we need to flirt today.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has shared:

I’ve had so much tea trying to get rid of this cold that I’m now speaking with a British accent and am fascinated with the Royal family.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has shared:

Hear me out. A waiting room where the doctors wait.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Telegram:

Work beers should be a daily thing.

Live now on Reddit:

There should be a day between Sunday and Monday called Hang on a Second.

Reported on WhatsApp:

Sex is like tacos. I wish I were having some now.

Broadcasted on Slack:

Signatures are so unserious, just “pinky promise” for adults. Write your name in a silly little way on this very important piece of paper so we that we can send you to jail if you do anything wrong.

Trending via WeChat:

Dear Santa, Money!

Breaking via Twitch:

Hey, so this Mercury retrograde is actually really demonic and soul-crippling. Let’s wrap this up by midnight.

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

When you clean your room so well that the only trash left is you.

Freshly posted on Discord:

Accordion to current studies, 90% of you did not realize that this sentence started with a musical instrument.

Spotted on Instagram:

What do you mean I never reach out? I literally thought about you.

Spotted on WeChat:

The lion is starting to concern himself with things he’s been trying to ignore.

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