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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from πŸ‡¬πŸ‡Ά has copied:

When you turn 50, they change the lightbulb in your fridge to that memory eraser from Men in Black.

Someone from πŸ‡§πŸ‡¬ has copied:

These cannot be the same knees that used to get low in heels at the club.

Someone from πŸ‡°πŸ‡ͺ has viewed:

Why do they call it a garage sale instead of a garbage sale?

Someone from πŸ‡ΈπŸ‡³ has copied:

Don’t forget to have an orgasm today. Partner is optional. Pleasure is not.

Someone from πŸ‡ΉπŸ‡΄ has copied:

Noise-canceling headphones aren’t enough, I need everyone to shut up.

Someone from πŸ‡ΉπŸ‡― has viewed:

So grateful for pillows. My head works hard, it deserves its own bed.

Someone from πŸ‡ͺπŸ‡ͺ has shared:

Maybe Monday is more scared of us than we are of it… we don’t know.

Someone from πŸ‡°πŸ‡ͺ has copied:

Does refusing to go to the gym count as resistance training?

Someone from πŸ‡­πŸ‡Ί has viewed:

May I please come over and curl up in your lap like a cat?

Someone from πŸ‡΅πŸ‡° has downloaded:

The part where the music beat is going from your left ear to the right at different intervals.

Funny Quotes Data πŸ€“

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,280

Social Media Log πŸ’«

Seen just now on Discord:

I don’t need anger management, you just need to stop making me angry!

Just landed via Twitch:

Welcome to your 40s: it’s Saturday night so you know what that means, absolutely nothing, go to bed.

Spotted on YouTube:

I hate to break it to you, guys, but my husband says you’re not real. He just called you my imaginary friends.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

I keep checking my phone like I mean something to somebody. Silly me.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

If you can figure out how to configure your default state to be slightly amused rather than slightly annoyed, you pretty much enter God Mode.

Breaking via Snapchat:

If you apply enough sunscreen, the rain simply rolls off.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

l identify as a Christmas tree. Lit on the outside, dead on the inside.

Just landed via Slack:

I modeled my morning routine on the humble rooster. Wake up, scream, wander around.

Going viral on Instagram:

I got a bumper sticker that says, “Honk if you think I’m pretty.” Sometimes I just sit at green lights until I feel better about myself.

Going viral on WeChat:

My gf doesn’t really like it when I talk about my ex, which means I now have a lot of stories from college where I’m just alone for some reason.

Funny hater quotes

Funny hater quotes are the perfect way to clap back with a smile 😏✨ When negativity pops up, why not turn it into a laugh? πŸ˜‚ These witty lines serve up clever comebacks that keep things light and playful πŸŽ‰ Whether you’re dealing with shade or just love a good roast, funny hater quotes bring humor to the haters’ game 🎭πŸ”₯ Get ready to laugh off the drama and sparkle on! 🌟

New funny hater quotes πŸ‘‡

All funny hater quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes πŸ‘Œ

Funny Quotes Collections
✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

30 shares on Snapchat this month:

Monday has a personal vendetta against my happiness.

85 shares on Twitch this month:

I hate when people can’t let go of the past. Debt collectors are the worst.

49 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Whenever I lose my faith in justice, I look at the high school beauties from back then today. Then I’m fine again.

17 shares on Snapchat this month:

If you’re riding in my car, that little middle piece is for my elbow β€” not yours.

13 shares on Twitch this month:

I don’t hate you. I just don’t like that you exist.

29 shares on Slack this month:

Lord, please take this gas out of my stomach and put it in my car.

93 shares on Instagram this month:

I think I look pretty okay for my age. It’s just when I hold menus two feet from my face that I know the ruse is up.

79 shares on Threads this month:

Anyone got any good sins for someone just getting into sinning?

75 shares on Reddit this month:

β€œI’ve been fantasizing about going back to bed since I woke up this morning.”

66 shares on Twitch this month:

How do people post 25 times a day? The only thing I can do 25 times a day is pee.

Trending Topics πŸ“

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes πŸ’₯

15 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

Instead of being constantly irritated by other people’s flaws, I’ve decided to become more self-absorbed.

21 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

Welcome to adulthood: you’re always sleepy unless you’re trying to get to sleep.

7 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

Sailors wish they could swear like me.

25 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

My workout is reading in bed until my arms hurt.

19 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

If love is the answer then what was the question?

10 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

I never feel more alone than when I’m trying to put sunscreen on my back.

13 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

Girls will be like β€œI have so much to do” then grab some snacks and start watching a 10 part docuseries on serial killers.

11 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

The Frankfurt School?? What are you majoring in, hot dog?

13 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

According to the web, caffeine deficiency is a life threatening condition for people around you.

10 folks are currently checking πŸ‘€

I am brilliantly social for one and a half hours, and then I need to recover in my bedroom cave for two days.

Funny Quotes Data πŸ€“

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,603

Activity Log ✨

Someone from πŸ‡ΉπŸ‡­ has shared:

Twitter is evidence that insane people can be extremely entertaining from a safe distance.

Someone from πŸ‡»πŸ‡¨ has viewed:

Adulting in 3 words: it’s always something.

Someone from πŸ‡·πŸ‡Ί has downloaded:

People never run off to join the circus anymore.

Someone from πŸ‡±πŸ‡§ has copied:

Buying groceries with no food stamps should boost your credit score.

Someone from πŸ‡΅πŸ‡± has viewed:

Everyone is getting idioter.

Someone from πŸ‡±πŸ‡Ύ has bookmarked:

A dating app for people who suck at flirting called Fumble.

Someone from πŸ‡ΏπŸ‡Ό has viewed:

Self-cleaning conscience.

Someone from πŸ‡²πŸ‡² has copied:

A song that hits so hard it makes you want a cigarette.

Someone from πŸ‡±πŸ‡Ή has downloaded:

Let’s hope those bridges you burn keep you warm at night.

Someone from πŸ‡ͺπŸ‡Ή has shared:

Googling phone numbers you don’t recognize instead of actually answering the phone.

Social Media Log πŸ’«

Spotted on Threads:

The haters said I couldn’t do it. And the haters? They were right. They were correct. They even nailed the small details, frankly it’s amazing.

Broadcasted on Twitch:

It was a complicated 17-hour surgery, but they finally managed to separate the art from the artist.

Shared recently on TikTok:

Can’t believe penguins have to publish all those books with their tiny hands.

Trending via Reddit:

I’m uncomfortable around tall people. What if they pick me up and put me on their shoulders?

Going viral on YouTube:

I wanna become so financially stable that God uses my pockets to bless others.

Trending via Slack:

“Delusional” ain’t a strong enough word to describe people anymore.

Going viral on Reddit:

My spirit animal is that one bird that knocks itself unconscious, flying into windows.

Just shared via X:

Giving people access to the internet was a massive mistake.

Trending via Twitch:

“Sweet Dreams (Are Made of This)” is now 40 years old. If you have an earworm now, you also have back pain.

Live now on Threads:

I’m so vulnerable to nostalgia. The sun will go down and I’ll be like: β€œWow… remember when the sun was up… I miss who I was then”

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