Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇫🇲 has copied:

You unfollow me because you are afraid of falling in love with me. I know!

Someone from 🇰🇮 has shared:

If GPT-5 will have ‘Ph.D.-level intelligence’, then GPT-6 will have the intelligence of someone who decided not to get a PhD.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has copied:

Why does Bruce Wayne, the billionaire, not simply rig Gotham City’s elections in favor of tough-on-crime candidates?

Someone from 🇰🇬 has copied:

When you bury a body, cover it with endangered plants, so it’s illegal to dig it up. Follow me for more gardening tips!

Someone from 🇦🇱 has bookmarked:

Anti-capitalism is just code for “I don’t know how anything works.”

Someone from 🇦🇲 has bookmarked:

I will charge a 25% tariff on my steely gaze.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has downloaded:

Most women need a little reassurance. Like when she says “oh, you want to see crazy?” Reassure her that you do not.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has copied:

I’d pretend to care about football for you.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has shared:

Every day I ask ChatGPT if it knows where my keys are and if it ever knows the answer, I’m suing everybody.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has copied:

Nobody is meaner to me than me. So take your shot.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,473

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Instagram:

I will sit in the rain about this.

Going viral on Instagram:

Imagine going to see a situationship in 1868, and you go outside, and your horse is dead as hell.

Going bananas on WeChat:

Seeking a date so intense even the candles are sweating.

Making waves on WeChat:

Toast doesn’t talk. How do you know it’s French?

Shared recently on Discord:

Comments other people make during a movie are annoying. Comments I make during a movie enhance the experience.

Just landed via LinkedIn:

What does my tattoo mean? It means I couldn’t be trusted with $200 when I was 18.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

Today, I changed a light bulb and walked into a bar. My life is a joke.

Just landed via Facebook:

Careful, “friend”. One more word about Shakira and you might find out just how fast I can draw this blade.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

Wife bought something on FB Marketplace, but she’s afraid she’ll get kidnapped, so she sends me to pick it up from a guy whose wife sent him because she’s afraid to get kidnapped.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

I’m at that age where I can no longer refer to other people as “elderly.”

Funny jolly quotes

New funny jolly quotes 👇

All funny jolly quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

48 shares on WhatsApp this month:

If I were karma, I’d watch my back.

21 shares on LinkedIn this month:

April Fool’s next week and still no one has asked me to be their fool.

15 shares on X this month:

Sometimes I’m out in public and I have to look down real quick to make sure I remembered to put on pants.

69 shares on Slack this month:

Are you http? Because I’m :// without you.

41 shares on YouTube this month:

Parenting is yelling ‘you just had a snack!’ over and over until you give in and throw them another snack.

31 shares on WeChat this month:

Eating wings is the opposite of flying.

28 shares on WeChat this month:

My mental health is as reliable as a flashlight in a horror film.

72 shares on Twitch this month:

White, black, yellow, brown, Democrat, Republican, man, woman, straight, gay, transgender, Jew, Christian, Muslim, young and old — you will all taste the same to the zombies.

60 shares on Pinterest this month:

Being old is basically trying to figure out what part of the body the noise is coming from, and why.

15 shares on Reddit this month:

Ripped a tag off my leggings and did not realize it was load-bearing.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

7 folks are currently checking 👀

My DMs are always open if you want to talk to yourself.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

I cannot hear a word you are saying if your hoodie strings are uneven.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

It’s so hot out here, I saw a bird blowing on a worm before he ate it.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

Until I open the wrapper and look inside it’s Schrödinger’s Kit Kat.

14 folks are currently checking 👀

I love ordering things online because when they arrive it’s like a present from me to me.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Who called it a missed phone call from your parents and not a boomer rang?

15 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m a strong, independent woman, but like, against my will.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Once you find humor in any situation, you have nothing to fear.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

I have two dogs: one dominates, the other is a subwoofer.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

Welcome to your senior years, where you get mad when they rearrange the grocery store.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,521

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇭 has bookmarked:

Hansel and Gretel weren’t wrong, every bad decision I’ve ever made started with being hungry.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has downloaded:

No matter how bad your day seems, just remember that someone out there has line danced to Achy Breaky Heart.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has copied:

You can pronounce it “Nude Jersey” and no one will know.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has shared:

Hey boy, are you my washing machine? Because neither of you know how long 10 minutes last.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has bookmarked:

Don’t suffer in silence. Make it everyone’s problem.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has bookmarked:

You’re in her DMs, she’s in my bed whining that it’s too cold. Can you come get her?

Someone from 🇪🇪 has viewed:

A chocolate advent calendar is a test of restraint that I simply do not have.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has copied:

What happened to the art of just liking one person?

Someone from 🇭🇺 has viewed:

After a month away and enough pasta to scare an Italian grandma, I can confirm: too much Parmesan? Never heard of her.

Someone from 🇲🇭 has bookmarked:

Do people who spend a fortune on outdoor heating know they can just go inside?

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on WhatsApp:

My trauma is between me and this bartender. The rest of you, mind your business.

Just shared via YouTube:

I think I’ll just let my jazz hands speak for themselves.

Going viral on Discord:

The great thing about having a mouse in your house is that I’m sure it’s just the one mouse, probably.

Spotted on Discord:

Dear Santa, Money!

Spreading quickly via Snapchat:

Fun fact: sexual tension is more fun than the sex itself.

Broadcasted on Messenger:

Update on my fitness journey: My wife just handed me a bag of apples at the market and said, “careful, it’s heavy.”

Just shared via Slack:

I think my type is a nice person.

Making waves on Discord:

I don’t do anything with my life except romanticize and decay with indecision.

Making waves on WeChat:

You may find my attraction to Goofy weird, but I don’t give a hyuck.

Breaking via Facebook:

That Coldplay CEO guy was held more accountable than the president.

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