Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇫🇲 has shared:

Rather than touching grass, I recommend going to a concert and experiencing the live performance of that one song you hold religiously close to your heart.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has bookmarked:

There’s no filter on my pics or my thoughts. I’m just out here raw-dogging it.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has shared:

Whoever came up with the spelling for “receipt” was an idiopt.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has viewed:

All these years on the internet we have been working for artificial intelligence.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has copied:

Please don’t celebrate April Fool’s day if you’re not a fool. My culture is not your costume.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has downloaded:

When someone asks me if my twins are natural, I tell them no they’re robots.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has copied:

It takes only one person in this world to make you smile. It’s called a plastic surgeon.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has bookmarked:

If you knock down a policeman, they’ll get backup.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has bookmarked:

Took my car to the mechanic because it was making a terrible noise. He removed the Mariah Carey Christmas CD, and now it’s fine.

Someone from 🇬🇼 has viewed:

Sometimes people come into your life — and they need to stop doing that.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Feb 3, 2026

3,568

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via WhatsApp:

No one ever talks about the 6th love language (being annoying).

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

I told my wife the laundry on the couch ain’t gonna fold itself, so if y’all don’t hear from me later, she probably folded me like an omelet.

Just shared via Reddit:

Common sense isn’t a gift. It’s a punishment, because you have to deal with everyone who doesn’t have it.

Spotted on Pinterest:

“I’m getting tired of everything being 100 dollars and 100 degrees.”

Going bananas on Threads:

After I drink coffee, I show my empty cup to the IT guy and say that I have successfully installed Java. He hates me.

Seen just now on Twitch:

Staring at the sky for answers, nothing new.

Just landed via Slack:

I did some soul searching last night. I’m happy to report I still have one.

Going viral on Instagram:

My toxic trait is that I give my friends mental health advice when I belong in an asylum.

Making waves on WeChat:

I disagree with everyone and think relationships should be easy.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

Soon as vampires become real, I’m first in line for my bite.

Funny malnutrition quotes

Funny malnutrition quotes bring a lighthearted twist to a serious topic 🍎😂! They mix humor with health, making us smile while reminding us to eat right 🥦💪. Whether you’re a foodie or just love clever wordplay, these witty lines serve up laughs and lessons all in one bite 🍽️😄. Ready for some chuckles that nourish the soul? Let’s dive into the funniest takes on malnutrition! 🎉🥳

New funny malnutrition quotes 👇

My favorite game is to guess if my headache is due to dehydration, migraine, malnutrition, stress, lack of sleep, poor position, or a brain tumor.

3 weeks ago

brain, brain tumor, dehydration, due, favorite, game, guess, headache, health, health humor, humor, joke, lack, lack of sleep, malnutrition, medical, medical joke, migraine, poor, poor position, position, sleep, stress, tumor
My favorite game is guessing if my headache is due to dehydration, migraine, malnutrition, stress, lack of sleep, poor posture, or a brain tumor.

3 weeks ago

brain, concern, dehydration, due, favorite, game, guessing, headache, health, health concern, humor, lack, malnutrition, medical, medical humor, migraine, poor, posture, sleep, stress

All funny malnutrition quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

57 shares on Instagram this month:

Anyone who wants to learn how to be humble, feel free to talk to me. There’s nothing like learning from the best.

47 shares on Twitch this month:

I used to blame all my problems on my parents, but now that I’m a grown up, I have come to terms with the fact that when bad things happen to me, it’s probably just that Mercury’s in retrograde again.

38 shares on WhatsApp this month:

My kid’s superpower is knowing he won’t like a food before he even tries it.

69 shares on Reddit this month:

have one of those big paintings with the eyeholes cut out, but I don’t have anyone to spy on, so I just watch TV through it.

17 shares on Discord this month:

I need to stop drinking so much. Did I say drinking? I meant thinking. I definitely need to drink more.

78 shares on TikTok this month:

I can feel your energy from two planets away.

29 shares on WeChat this month:

I was so locked in, to the point where we were tongue-kissing with morning breath.

50 shares on YouTube this month:

Well, maybe grass should touch me for once. How about that?

52 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I’m going to a karaoke bar tomorrow, where I’ll sing every song in the style of Yoko Ono.

30 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Accept the truth that a clean kitchen and finished laundry are just myths. Embrace the chaos and find your inner calm.

Trending Topics 📁

Hot Jokes 💥

18 folks are currently checking 👀

You should get one IG story in addition to your one phone call when you’re arrested.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

Not to brag, but no one has ever accused me of trying too hard.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

If Facebook has taught us anything it’s that a lot of people aren’t quite ready for a spelling bee.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

Living up to your potential sounds exhausting.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

The only thing that could heal me is a memory loss.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

Wanted to report a YouTube video, but there is no option for “Cringe”, so I just picked “Terrorism”.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m not accepting the bare minimum; I need you to shake it to the max.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

If you are influenced by influencers, you’re beyond retarded.

23 folks are currently checking 👀

Milk or be milked.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

At some point, my colleagues will manage to get me my own true crime documentary on Netflix.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,473

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇭 has shared:

Gyms are empty because they’re all on weight loss drugs.

Someone from 🇬🇩 has shared:

Being a writer means canceling your plans so you have time to write, and then spending hours avoiding writing.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has downloaded:

Those eyes ain’t gonna roll itself, let me help you.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has viewed:

Why can’t opportunity just come back later?

Someone from 🇹🇯 has shared:

If she reads Bukowski, she’s not looking for love. She’s looking for someone who will ruin her creatively.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has viewed:

“You’re such a stalker!” God forbid a woman wants to know more about her future husband.

Someone from 🇹🇹 has downloaded:

Husband said he only wants to allow our kids to watch Looney Tunes and nothing else because of the “moral lessons”.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has bookmarked:

“AI is coming for your jobs!” I’d like to see AI send 5 emails a day and check their fantasy football line-ups on and off for 8 hours.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has viewed:

Anyone still shut off lights when leaving a room because their parents used to say, “Don’t waste electricity!”

Someone from 🇪🇷 has viewed:

I love replying to people within seconds. Hello. I am here. Always.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on X:

Mercury is no longer in retrograde, so never trust a cow because the sun can’t swim.

Going viral on Pinterest:

These weekends are starting to feel as long as a lunch break.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

Imagine you get to the gates of heaven and they make you download an app to go in.

Shared recently on TikTok:

I need a stunt double for when I’m navigating my way to the bathroom at night.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

“Work smarter, not harder.” Brother, I’m not doing either of those things.

Spotted on Instagram:

I don’t understand why judges get paid so much, others judge me for free.

Trending via Slack:

The only thing worse than children talking about sex is adults talking about politics.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

There’s literally no law that says you can’t put your friends down as your references and pretend they were your boss at an old job. Literally, there’s no law that says that.

Spotted on Instagram:

Scrolling to your birth year is a humiliation ritual.

Spreading quickly via Threads:

I hate when recipes tell you to take something out of the pan and add it back in later. No way bro. It’s staying in there.

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