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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇺🇬 has shared:

If they can make a nuclear reactor small enough to power a submarine, why can’t they make one for my house?

Someone from 🇬🇼 has shared:

Website: We use cookies to improve performance. Me: Same.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has bookmarked:

I love when I come home, I put on my Adam Sandler clothes.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has copied:

I love that retail therapy works on me. I am so much happier and at peace when I’m buying things for myself.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has viewed:

Don’t hate me because I can fall asleep within seconds; hate me because I can sleep through the night without having to get up to go to the bathroom.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has shared:

When they have a dream sequence in a movie, how do they film the person’s dream?

Someone from 🇧🇹 has copied:

Being a millennial means finding out you can’t afford to live in that apartment complex you thought was really shady when you were a kid.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has viewed:

Several of my internal organs hurt, but I’m 100% sure it’s not my body trying to tell me something.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has viewed:

If I like you I keep you close, if not I keep you at a distance so I can mime squishing your head between my thumb and forefinger.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has shared:

I can’t date until the curse is lifted.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

96 this month

Funny Quotes Total

14,690

Funny Quotes Topics

16,895

Funny Quotes Images

14,690

Dec 1, 2025

3,782

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Messenger:

I use a headshot from 2008 on my LinkedIn to prepare future employers for disappointment.

Trending via Twitch:

Let’s drink some whiskey and say too much.

Going bananas on Telegram:

When you turn 50, they change the lightbulb in your fridge to that memory eraser from Men in Black.

Spotted on Threads:

I think God was high when he made me.

Spotted on Telegram:

All women want is to consistently annoy one handsome man forever.

Trending via YouTube:

Seize the day! Unless it sucks. Then seize the next one.

Spreading quickly via TikTok:

Today I bought a doughnut without sprinkles. This diet thing is hard.

Making waves on YouTube:

I hate to brag but I excel at my faults.

Spreading quickly via Pinterest:

If you’re doing Dry January, please, please, keep it to yourself. Nobody cares, and you’re probably even more boring without alcohol.

Seen just now on Reddit:

Girl math is deactivating social media accounts to avoid only one person.

Home » Funny Multimillionaire Quotes

Funny multimillionaire quotes

New funny multimillionaire quotes 👇

1 month ago

Commentary:
"Well, if being tired of not being a multimillionaire were a paying job, we’d all be rolling in dough by now! 💸😂 Keep dreaming big and who knows, you might just hit the jackpot one day! 🌟💰"

being, frustration, money, multimillionaire, tired, wealth

All funny multimillionaire quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

96 this month

Funny Quotes Total

14,690

Funny Quotes Topics

16,895

Funny Quotes Images

14,690

Dec 1, 2025

3,901

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇿 has viewed:

Love it when you say or do some common sense thing and the other person has “file not found” written all over their face.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has bookmarked:

If the universe is continuing to expand then why does my rent keep going up?

Someone from 🇳🇦 has downloaded:

You know it’s cold outside when you go outside and it’s cold.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has viewed:

At the plastic surgeon: Please, Doc, help me. My Barbie doll has appendicitis.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has downloaded:

Just got sacked from my job at a think tank for thinking about donuts.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has downloaded:

Salsa counts as a serving of vegetables, right?

Someone from 🇪🇸 has viewed:

You can count the number of times my wife has agreed with me on one hand, if you don’t have fingers.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has shared:

Might quit my job to focus on summer.

Someone from 🇸🇷 has bookmarked:

Being the introverted hopeless romantic with a high sex drive is a curse.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has bookmarked:

One thing I will never understand about adulthood is how I’m supposed to make appointments if I work full time and every place closes at 6 p.m.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on X:

Do you think they’re called cough drops because when you cough really hard they drop out of your mouth onto the floor?

Broadcasted on YouTube:

Want to come over? We can trauma dump, take a nap, and then order a pizza and watch a movie.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

Being quiet in a room full of loud people is my favorite sport.

Trending via Instagram:

The theory that two stacked beds can’t be converted into two regular beds has been debunked.

Just landed via X:

Toys R Us went out of business because their mascot was a stupid giraffe when it could’ve been a toy dinosaur called the Toysaurus. It was right there man.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

The marriage rate has been trending downward. Choreographed wedding dances may be the reason.

Shared recently on YouTube:

Nothing tastes as good as skinny feels.

Spotted on Pinterest:

My dad called my philosophy degree a “license for unemployment.”

Shared recently on Instagram:

Interesting people are my favorite endangered species.

Freshly posted on Slack:

I did the math and a second job would help me get out of debt as long as I start it twelve years ago.

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