Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇿 has shared:

I heard a mouse yesterday. So now I loudly announce myself whenever I enter a dark room. In case you’re wondering how brave I am.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has bookmarked:

“I’m not dramatic. I just react with the intensity of a Shakespearean widow at all times.”

Someone from 🇸🇧 has shared:

I’m of the very strong opinion that sex ed should be taught by a woman 37 weeks into her third pregnancy, while her husband sits scrolling through his phone, and her other two children run wild.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has shared:

Lately life has been all panic no disco.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has downloaded:

Please don’t ever speak to me about math. I’ve moved on.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has viewed:

Saying “Who is it?” when the doctor knocks on the exam room door.

Someone from 🇬🇭 has bookmarked:

I was 21 when I was 15, that’s why everything’s boring now.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has shared:

Women do not snore. The sound they make at night is just the rewinding of the vocal cords.

Someone from 🇮🇪 has viewed:

Got me some lemons now for the cold. I hope the tequila helps.

Someone from 🇪🇹 has copied:

Men call us “gold diggers” when we expect them to pay for a meal. Honey, a gold digger goes after yachts, not a piece of chicken.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,741

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on Snapchat:

I hope the babies I was born with at the hospital are doing good.

Spreading quickly via WeChat:

Gonna start an app for cat sitters where they can review the cats they take care of and it’ll be called Litterboxd.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

Everything feels like thinking the stripper actually likes you.

Just shared via Threads:

The sweet spot is just enough pain to know you’re alive, but not quite enough to wish you were dead.

Just shared via Pinterest:

When a man likes you, he talks to you every day, and apparently, when you start to like him back, he is very busy and can’t talk at all. That’s how it works.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

If someone asks you if you’re in the queue, what they actually mean is “you’re really shit at queuing, aren’t you?”

Shared recently on Reddit:

Sleeping nakey nakey nakey just in case Santa wants a different type of cookie tonight.

Seen just now on Discord:

Monsters can’t hide under my bed. That’s where my cats have their fight club.

Just shared via Facebook:

Sorry it took so long to text you back; my social bandwidth was buffering.

Going viral on Pinterest:

I don’t really care how you met your partner. Tell me about how you met your nemesis.

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Social Media Stars ⭐

43 shares on Pinterest this month:

A female will ghost you, and the whole time she is waiting for you to text back again.

83 shares on Pinterest this month:

My biggest fear about becoming a zombie is all the walking.

62 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Whoever came up with a 30 minute lunch break needs a 30 minute beating.

94 shares on Threads this month:

I followed a diet but it didn’t follow me back, so I unfollowed it.

67 shares on Pinterest this month:

My thighs are bigger than my chances in life.

67 shares on Instagram this month:

I wish I could just drop my body off at the gym and pick it up later.

78 shares on Slack this month:

My superpower? I can look you right in the eyes while you’re talking and not hear a single word you said.

36 shares on TikTok this month:

I wish rolling your eyes burned calories.

39 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Why the hell did they name them ‘Soldier ants’ and not ‘Combatants’?

45 shares on Discord this month:

The other day, I got the crazy idea to see if I could still do a cartwheel. I can’t.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

12 folks are currently checking 👀

Cool times create cool guys.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

Flying bugs can basically go anywhere they want, but still choose to fly right into your face.

15 folks are currently checking 👀

Be careful when you follow the masses sometimes the M is silent.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Did you know electronics need smoke to work? Once the smoke comes out of them, they stop working.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

Therapy isn’t enough. I need to be electrocuted and get my memory erased.

25 folks are currently checking 👀

Sorry for having no idea what the hell I am doing. It will happen again.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

As you get older, it’s amazing how fast bird-watching creeps up on you…

20 folks are currently checking 👀

My favorite pirate song is “Aye of the Tiger”

9 folks are currently checking 👀

Can’t wait for the day off from work so I can sit on the couch at home and stare at the TV screen while thinking about work.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

You can fake a smile, but you can’t fake jazz hands.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,485

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇱 has downloaded:

If you ever find yourself mad at me, put a cape on so you can be super mad.

Someone from 🇮🇸 has viewed:

I think something’s missing in my life… Like… 2-3 million dollars.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has bookmarked:

I have two dogs: one dominates, the other is a subwoofer.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has shared:

If I were God, I’d tell everyone that I created the animals and that I don’t know what happened after that.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has bookmarked:

“I” before “E,” except when your foreign neighbor Keith receives eight counterfeit beige sleighs from weird, feisty, caffeinated weightlifters.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has downloaded:

Adulting is getting excited to go home and get into bed.

Someone from 🇺🇿 has shared:

Working on a laptop outside is an abysmal experience.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has downloaded:

Can’t believe I didn’t get invited to that party I would have made up an excuse not to go to.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has downloaded:

Full-time employment will have you making lists of thoughts to think.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has viewed:

Any house is an Airbnb if you’re quiet enough.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via Messenger:

Born to hate people. Somehow ended up in customer service.

Shared recently on Discord:

Does everyone have that one colleague at work who puts you in a bad mood just by looking at them?

Going bananas on Reddit:

Ain’t no girls in my messages, just a bunch of verification codes.

Seen just now on Telegram:

Having a crush on a girl makes you think things like, yes, let me make more money.

Spotted on Threads:

Pronouncing hyperbole like guacamole.

Going viral on Slack:

Going to the beach is 99% getting ready for the beach and 1% enjoying the beach.

Broadcasted on Reddit:

We can do things two ways. My way or the right way.

Spotted on TikTok:

The Masters would be a lot more interesting if there were starving alligators roaming throughout the golf course.

Freshly posted on WeChat:

College is literally just you, your laptop, and your water bottle against the world.

Seen just now on Threads:

One minute you’re young and wild, the next minute you’re into air fryers.

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