Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇱 has shared:

My body cracks like a glow stick every time I move, but refuses to light up.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has copied:

Anyone else brush their teeth in the shower so they can get a little sloppy with it, or is that just me?

Someone from 🇸🇹 has copied:

Camping: When you spend a small fortune to live like somebody poor.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has bookmarked:

It always takes me an hour to get ready. 45 minutes for doing nothing and 15 hectic minutes for the rest.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has bookmarked:

In general, I like company, but not when I am with my pizza.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has bookmarked:

If you give a man a fish, that fish is basically gone. Way to lose your fish.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has viewed:

You don’t have to check your Spotify Wrapped, you are the most played this year.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has bookmarked:

Sorry, but if you’re walking slower than me on the sidewalk, you’re my enemy. Walking faster than me? Also my enemy. Now if you’re walking at the same speed as me… hmm, yeah, I’m thinking enemy.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has shared:

Me, as a vampire: Tell me, mortal, have you had any alcohol in the last 24 hours?

Someone from 🇲🇦 has downloaded:

My mom asked me to hand out invitations for my brother’s surprise birthday party, and that’s when I realized he was the favorite twin.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,570

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on YouTube:

I remember owning a mobile device as a kid, it was called my bike.

Just landed via WeChat:

Ever been in the car with someone who drives so fast that you press your imaginary brakes on the passenger side?

Trending via Threads:

Exercise gives you energy, but you need energy to exercise. Sounds like a pyramid scheme to me.

Making waves on Twitch:

What if instead of Big Mac it was Big Matt and he came out and said hello to you?

Seen just now on Threads:

Gnocchi: The small, chubby children of spaghetti and potatoes.

Shared recently on Reddit:

Every night, millions of teeth go unbrushed.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

What if we kissed while watching the decay of our society?

Going bananas on X:

I feel like I should give my air conditioner a plaque for employee of the month.

Broadcasted on TikTok:

Is it stupid and irresponsible? Yes. Will it make me happy? Also yes.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

Snaccident: eating a whole bag of Doritos in one sitting.

Funny Scholastic Book Fair quotes

New funny Scholastic Book Fair quotes 👇

All funny Scholastic Book Fair quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

35 shares on Pinterest this month:

Group projects in school weren’t meant to teach you teamwork, they were meant to teach you how to deal with the incompetence of your coworkers in the workplace.

50 shares on Messenger this month:

I’m at that age where I can no longer refer to other people as “elderly.”

29 shares on Discord this month:

Establish dominance by dropping your panties first.

58 shares on Threads this month:

Much like a candle, I was tall when I was young, but I get shorter as I grow old.

93 shares on Discord this month:

The homie who’s ultimately just a pawn in your grand scheme.

84 shares on WhatsApp this month:

No wine. No peace. Know wine. Know peace.

23 shares on Reddit this month:

I’m at a place in my life when errands are starting to count as going out.

15 shares on Telegram this month:

Hair is unwashed, so I obviously feel like I’m fundamentally unlovable.

92 shares on Threads this month:

All these microplastics in me could at least do some repair work to my knees and back while they’re in there.

10 shares on Snapchat this month:

The most important meal of the day is the next one.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

17 folks are currently checking 👀

Pizza rolls are comfort food because they look like little pillows.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

You either get a kid who eats like a bottomless pit, or you get one that when asked what they want for lunch answers “No thanks, I had lunch yesterday.”

14 folks are currently checking 👀

I’d rather be spotted in a strip club than a Subway.

5 folks are currently checking 👀

Waffles are just pancakes with abs.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Unfortunately for things, they have no choice but to work out for me.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

I made you something special for Mother’s Day, my kid threatened.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

That gap between Christmas and New Year’s when you can’t tell what day of the week it is.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

I had too much to think last night.

16 folks are currently checking 👀

We can do things two ways. My way or the right way.

22 folks are currently checking 👀

Can’t, too busy deleting screenshots of my lock screen.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,582

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇹 has bookmarked:

I don’t need therapy. I need everyone who’s ever wronged me to suddenly feel a chill and not know why.

Someone from 🇨🇴 has downloaded:

It’s funny how you can annoy unhappy people by remaining calm.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has downloaded:

The Secret Service was chasing me but I painted a tunnel on the side of a wall and they all ran into it.

Someone from 🇻🇺 has shared:

I think my type is a nice person.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has shared:

To everyone I’ve wronged this year. Next year same time, same place.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has downloaded:

Don’t let anyone treat you like a red flag, you’re the whole damn red carpet, baby.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has viewed:

Before the internet, going viral meant your drawing made it to the fridge, and your sibling was furious.

Someone from 🇱🇺 has viewed:

Okay, fall, I see you showing a lil’ leg.

Someone from 🇦🇲 has copied:

I think it’s healthy to be a little horny at all times.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has bookmarked:

Kinda messed up that the government knows my birthday but never sends me a gift or anything.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

Can’t wait to overuse the “My husband said,” “Let me phone my husband,” “I’ll ask my husband.”

Making waves on Messenger:

I could have been the favorite mistress of the Sun King at Versailles, but nooooooooo I had to be born into late stage capitalism.

Spotted on Reddit:

Donuts hug you from the inside.

Just shared via TikTok:

Welcome to Twitter: yeah, none of us can sleep either.

Just shared via Discord:

Google Maps should start screaming the more wrong turns you make.

Trending via Snapchat:

Some things are better left unsaid, which I usually realize after I say them.

Trending via Pinterest:

Me: I love you more than a flower loves the sun. Him: I love you more than a teenager loves his phone.

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

It’s like 10,000 yawns when all you need is a nap.

Freshly posted on Threads:

Heartbreaking: Introvert sentenced to 100 hours of hanging out.

Just landed via Facebook:

“Can you explain the gap in your resume?” I went missing in a national park.

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