Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇲 has bookmarked:

Someone needs to invent a kid that listens the first time.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has shared:

If a company’s hiring sign says, “Come grow with us,” you’re about to do the job of 3-5 people.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has copied:

What’s a beginner question to ask for someone just getting into being nosy?

Someone from 🇷🇴 has viewed:

I’m basically the human version of tangled up Christmas lights.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has downloaded:

Seeing people exercising outside my house really motivated me to get up and close the blinds.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has viewed:

My bra isn’t just padded — it’s also filled with cookie and chip crumbs.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has bookmarked:

I firmly believe that at this point my guardian angel is just eating popcorn and watching the drama.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has copied:

We’ve been talking about eating the rich for so long, they got over-ripe.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has shared:

Nobody in the entire world has ever known what to do with me.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has downloaded:

So sad. Elvis died before he could see the Lego movie. He woulda been like, ‘Mama, those blocks are movin’ and shakin.’

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,381

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via Telegram:

The list of women who haven’t slept with me is really impressive.

Spotted on YouTube:

If my fingers don’t motion like scissors snipping when I ask for a haircut at the salon, how will they know what I mean?

Making waves on YouTube:

When people tell me “you’re going to regret that in the morning”, I sleep until noon because I am a problem solver.

Spreading quickly via Reddit:

I hope you catch the bouquet at my funeral.

Freshly posted on Slack:

They should invent a January that doesn’t drain your will to live.

Trending via Telegram:

That’s me in the corner, that’s me in the spotlight, begging for my cat’s attention.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

The only thing I gained so far this year is weight.

Broadcasted on Slack:

Going to IKEA if anyone needs some meatballs.

Spotted on Pinterest:

Movies in the 80s had me convinced that a main part of being a grown-up was staying late at the office and eating Chinese takeout.

Just landed via Telegram:

Well, maybe grass should touch me for once. How about that?

Funny skin color quotes

New funny skin color quotes 👇

I have no need to judge people because of their religion, skin color or sexual orientation. Bad behavior is enough for me.

1 month ago

acceptance, bad, bad behavior, behavior, color, equality, humor, i, judge, judgment, me, need, orientation, people, religion, sarcasm, sexual, sexual orientation, skin, skin color

All funny skin color quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

12 shares on YouTube this month:

According to a recent study, women who are a little overweight live longer than men who mention it.

11 shares on Messenger this month:

Running feels great until you compare it to not running.

33 shares on TikTok this month:

You’d think someone in the room would’ve spoken up like “hey guys, maybe it’s a bad idea to make one ring to rule them all”.

76 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Haven’t seen a single bikini photoshoot in the snow this year; the girls are tired.

43 shares on Threads this month:

I smile at all animals, just not the human ones.

91 shares on Facebook this month:

“I’m too pretty for this” is a very valid excuse, actually.

84 shares on WhatsApp this month:

“Your call is very important to us. Please stay on the line until your call is no longer important to you.”

57 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Unfortunately for the haters, I will continue to keep being me.

78 shares on Pinterest this month:

If you’re out shopping today, be nice to retail workers. It’s not their fault you waited until Marys waters broke before you started your shopping.

47 shares on Messenger this month:

I have read that there are imaginary pregnancies. The belly gets bigger and bigger, but there is no baby inside. Finally a diagnosis.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇭 has viewed:

To the spirits in my walls: going to the store, be right back.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has downloaded:

Giving every single movie I watch a five star review because it’s just such a joy to be alive.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has shared:

Hosting Thanksgiving? Bring up politics so everyone will leave early.

Someone from 🇭🇳 has copied:

I am “We read the newspaper front to back every single day,” years old.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has downloaded:

And so ends another week without me getting rich unexpectedly.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has viewed:

I’d stalk me too, I get it.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has bookmarked:

My mental health is as reliable as a flashlight in a horror film.

Someone from 🇰🇲 has copied:

How do I get recruited by a cult? I need some direction in my life.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has viewed:

Someone needs to invent a kid that listens the first time.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has copied:

Who wants to do all my adult stuff for me today?

Social Media Log 💫

Making waves on Facebook:

The most unrealistic part of Christmas movies isn’t the existence of Santa… it’s that all these people have, like, a month off work with no interruptions.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

Still waiting for aliens to abduct me, which feels pretty rude considering I’ve been dressed and ready for years.

Making waves on Facebook:

I wish I were a wild horse in Kazakhstan. That would fix everything.

Breaking via Messenger:

I used to look for monsters under the bed. Today I know they are behind some people’s fake smiles.

Live now on Facebook:

Deleting my mental health to focus on social media.

Just shared via Twitch:

Monday holds the record for being the worst day of the week.

Broadcasted on WeChat:

Me: I love you more than a flower loves the sun. Him: I love you more than a teenager loves his phone.

Going bananas on Snapchat:

Reverse cowgirl so I can bend backward and look at him like the Exorcist.

Spotted on Messenger:

I prefer not to think before speaking. I like being as surprised as everyone else by what comes out of my mouth.

Spotted on YouTube:

I’m at the age where, if you ask me to go out after 9 p.m., I’m definitely not coming.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Funny skin color quotes

New funny skin color quotes 👇

I have no need to judge people because of their religion, skin color or sexual orientation. Bad behavior is enough for me.

All funny skin color quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨