Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇳 has shared:

A collective orgasm would fix the world.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has viewed:

For the record, I use a turntable.

Someone from 🇸🇬 has bookmarked:

The audacity of someone being in the store aisle I want to go down.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has downloaded:

A two-year old is kind of like having a blender, but you don’t have a top for it.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has bookmarked:

British people be like “YouChube.”

Someone from 🇸🇳 has shared:

Due to unforeseen circumstances, I will be acting weird today.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has viewed:

The sexual tension between me and disappearing without an explanation.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has downloaded:

Don’t let anyone treat you like pond water. You are Fiji water, okay?

Someone from 🇨🇷 has copied:

Touch my butt, not my coffee.

Someone from 🇻🇳 has shared:

Good morning everyone, who feels like working today? I promise I’ll let you do my job.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,541

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Slack:

The way I see it, eating chips while I wait for my pizza to arrive is no different than ordering a starter in a restaurant.

Making waves on Discord:

One thing I will never understand about adulthood is how I’m supposed to make appointments if I work full time and every place closes at 6 p.m.

Trending via Discord:

I don’t understand why my husband has to pay for a UFC fight when he could just throw one piece of candy on the floor in front of our kids.

Spotted on Discord:

If anyone wants to contact me, from now on I can only be reached via my bank account.

Trending via WhatsApp:

Nobody has ever been more surprised than a husband hearing about his wife’s plans for the second time.

Going bananas on Reddit:

I’m not “dating to marry” or “dating for fun.” I’m dating for a secret third reason.

Spotted on X:

Honestly, I don’t think I have any more new passwords left in me. You wanna steal my identity? Go ahead, I hope you enjoy debt and terrible posture.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

The trash gets picked up tomorrow. Be ready.

Freshly posted on Facebook:

I don’t get vegetables on my pizza because I don’t like mixing business with pleasure.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

Me in hell: “So did it hurt when you fell from heaven.” Lucifer: “Get out!”

Funny skinny-dip quotes

New funny skinny-dip quotes 👇

Horror movies have ruined the joy of skinny-dipping for me.

1 month ago

activity, comedy, experience, fear, fun, fun activity, horror, horror movie, joy, me, movie, personal, personal experience, skinny-dip, swimming

All funny skinny-dip quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Random Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

40 shares on Discord this month:

If you don’t buy any snacks, you’re proud for a moment and then incredibly sad.

63 shares on Facebook this month:

My parents still haven’t apologized for making me ugly.

86 shares on WhatsApp this month:

I’m bringing back “holy moly” and nobody can stop me.

94 shares on Twitch this month:

Why do babies stare at you like they know you from somewhere?

36 shares on Reddit this month:

If anyone wants to contact me, from now on I can only be reached via my bank account.

49 shares on Twitch this month:

Be useless, so nobody can use you.

17 shares on Reddit this month:

Rudolph’s bright red nose would not have done anything to improve Santa’s visibility in dense fog.

67 shares on TikTok this month:

Garlic and bread is the only marriage I truly have faith in.

68 shares on Twitch this month:

Welcome to Elephant in the Room club, no one talks about it.

91 shares on Messenger this month:

Remember, when asking for a raise, it is considered customary to be sober.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇴 has viewed:

Less is more, unless it’s kindness, sleep, or toilet paper.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has shared:

Being an adult is realizing $1000 is little money to have, but a lot to owe.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has bookmarked:

Why is it spelled “camouflage” and not “ “?

Someone from 🇸🇬 has copied:

Do you use AI, or is the AI using you?

Someone from 🇰🇮 has bookmarked:

Life hack: give yourself 8 to 12 hours of alone time in the morning to mentally prepare for the day.

Someone from 🇩🇯 has shared:

Don’t blame the alcohol. You were an idiot before you started drinking.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has bookmarked:

This coffee is not coffeeing the way I need it to be coffeeing.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has bookmarked:

There’s no-one who can get more drunk on power than the admin of a village Facebook group.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has downloaded:

Channeling my inner pretzel to achieve expert-level bad posture.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has copied:

They say the human body is 60% water, but after extensive observation of my husband and son, I’d like to submit a revision to the data. Those two are at least 50% wind.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on YouTube:

Turns out “YouTube rabbit hole” is not a reliable science degree.

Just landed via Telegram:

No more fun facts. I want to know what your last nightmare was about.

Going viral on Discord:

Current situation: lying in bed, trying to manifest breakfast.

Making waves on YouTube:

I just agree with people so that they stop talking.

Just shared via Telegram:

Reading fanfics is so fun, I wish romantic attraction was real.

Broadcasted on Reddit:

I’m sorry I pretended I was dead when I saw you in public.

Making waves on Slack:

Once you realize that the general public is retarded, you stop caring about how crazy you look to them.

Broadcasted on Twitch:

I love how you get on Twitter, and all your thoughts are already in someone else’s tweet.

Spotted on Messenger:

I’m implementing a new policy in my house: any child who is awake past bedtime can either go to sleep or clean the house, no exceptions.

Going viral on Discord:

Elevators frighten me. I take steps to avoid them.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Funny skinny-dip quotes

New funny skinny-dip quotes 👇

Horror movies have ruined the joy of skinny-dipping for me.

All funny skinny-dip quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨