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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇱 has downloaded:

People who scream sneeze need their own island.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has shared:

I was going to warn my kids about the repercussions of drugs and alcohol until I realized that they in fact were the repercussions of drugs and alcohol.

Someone from 🇦🇩 has bookmarked:

The only function of a middle name is so a child can assess how much danger they’re in.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has bookmarked:

Babe, wake up, it’s stupid outside!

Someone from 🇲🇬 has copied:

Nothing says, “I love you,” like an echo chamber.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has shared:

Sometimes I think I’m too old to make a career change. But then I remember how Walter White went from high school teacher to drug kingpin. Anything is possible!

Someone from 🇦🇺 has copied:

How does world hunger exist when we can fry air?

Someone from 🇱🇺 has shared:

I’m so single right now, I can’t even spell relayshaunship.

Someone from 🇹🇩 has copied:

A dating app called Unhinged where you agree to meet up and fight each other.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has downloaded:

My dog sighs a lot for someone who doesn’t pay any bills.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

801 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,963

Funny Quotes Topics

13,930

Funny Quotes Images

10,963

Updated

33 minutes ago

Users Online

3,424

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Discord:

Enjoy it now because you’re only going to get older and fatter.

Seen just now on Discord:

All these laws are really getting in the way of my driving.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

Line dancing was created by women waiting to use the restroom.

Seen just now on Telegram:

Is it stupid and irresponsible? Yes. Will it make me happy? Also yes.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

Me: I’m an introvert. Vodka: No, you’re not.

Breaking via Snapchat:

No, I love darkness at 5pm and the death of a nation.

Shared recently on X:

Do we lazy people actually go to heaven? Or are we being picked up?

Just landed via Messenger:

My kids and I have this bit where I say something and they ignore me.

Making waves on Twitch:

People will be like “there is no right or wrong way to do it” until you do it the wrong way.

Seen just now on Instagram:

I finally became a butterfly, and everyone’s already asking what’s next.

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Funny social worker quotes

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media need people procrastination relationship sarcasm social someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

801 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,963

Funny Quotes Topics

13,930

Funny Quotes Images

10,963

Updated

33 minutes ago

Users Online

3,421

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇻🇳 has copied:

How do I un-know people?

Someone from 🇹🇲 has bookmarked:

My goal weight is getting a magician to saw me in half.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has copied:

One of my greatest strengths is appearing busy so people don’t try to speak to me.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has downloaded:

At my age, I’m more frightened of a hip break than a heartbreak.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has shared:

Being an adult is a little out of my price range right now.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has shared:

The plant app says that I either watered my plant too much or not enough. Very helpful. Thanks!

Someone from 🇧🇮 has shared:

Whoever came up with the name wallpaper really nailed it.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has downloaded:

I’m so desperate for a vacation that at this point I’d spend an all inclusive week at Jurassic Park.

Someone from 🇿🇦 has downloaded:

If you ever find yourself mad at me, put a cape on so you can be super mad.

Someone from 🇷🇴 has shared:

Shout out to everyone who cooks at 180°C for 20 minutes, no matter what the instructions say.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via WhatsApp:

Guys only want one thing and it’s my grandmother’s meatball recipe.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

I totally get why Leonardo DiCaprio is trying to save the environment for future generations. They could be his girlfriend.

Going viral on X:

I don’t consider myself anything but average. However, I have aged well.

Going viral on Slack:

Are you spaghetti because I want you to meat my balls?

Just shared via Threads:

I used to party all night. Now I check the weather forecast for the next day to see if it’s a good laundry day.

Just shared via Snapchat:

I asked my doctor if I’m healthy enough for sex and he told me I’m not even sexy enough for health.

Trending via Pinterest:

The state of my house can best be described as “there seems to have been a struggle”.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

I always preferred the English spelling of “diarrhea” which is “diarrhoea” because it really looks like you’ve lost control of your vowels.

Just landed via WeChat:

Telling my guitar to “stay tuned”.

Spotted on Messenger:

“You’re so understanding,” yeah, because I don’t want to go to prison for the rest of my life.

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