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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇶 has copied:

Do you mind if I smash this object of great sentimental value?

Someone from 🇦🇸 has downloaded:

When is this robot army coming to take my job?

Someone from 🇨🇺 has viewed:

If stupidity got us into this mess, then why can’t it get us out?

Someone from 🇺🇿 has viewed:

Honestly, I don’t even play an active role in my life any more. Things just happen and I’m like “I guess this is what we’re doing now.”

Someone from 🇹🇭 has bookmarked:

During arguments with idiots, I wish I could throw a flash bang and disappear.

Someone from 🇹🇲 has viewed:

I don’t need the web for attention, I jog in a wedding dress.

Someone from 🇾🇪 has viewed:

Channeling my inner forest ghost: hauntingly fabulous and slightly lost.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has shared:

Another fine day ruined by responsibilities.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has viewed:

Sorry, I’m late. I found my old CD collection.

Someone from 🇹🇴 has shared:

Offering people sitting on the bus my standing room. Like it’s better.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2415 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,577

Funny Quotes Topics

15,246

Funny Quotes Images

12,577

6 minutes ago

3,458

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Slack:

He’s a 10 but so is his volume.

Just shared via Facebook:

This whole working for a living thing goes on for how long?

Just landed via Reddit:

Sundays are weird. You want to relax, but your brain’s like, “Shouldn’t you be panicking about something?”

Spotted on TikTok:

This Monday is Mondaying like it’s never Mondayed before.

Reported on WeChat:

Not just anyone can be cremated. You have to urn it.

Trending via Discord:

The invention of locks was a key turning point in history.

Seen just now on Slack:

No one suddenly needs anything more than a kid whose mom has just sat down and gotten comfortable.

Seen just now on Twitch:

One of my biggest talents is taking hundreds of screenshots that I swear I’ll need, but I never look at them again.

Spreading quickly via Reddit:

As a child, my family’s mealtime menu consisted of two choices: take it or leave it.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

It’s actually quite simple: I don’t want to eat less, I just want to weigh less.

Home » Funny Uh Quotes

Funny uh quotes

Funny uh quotes are the perfect way to embrace those awkward moments 😅 when words just don’t flow smoothly. Whether it’s a hilarious slip-up or a charming pause, these gems capture the quirky side of everyday chatter 🤪. Ready to laugh, relate, and share some serious giggles? Dive into the world of funny uh quotes and let the awkwardness become your new favorite comedy! 😂🎉

New funny uh quotes 👇

3 months ago
Share →: Uh oh, said somethin’ weird. Better fix it by saying something even weirder.

Commentary:
Oh no, classic strategy! When in doubt, just double down on the weirdness! 🤪 It's like trying to put out a fire by throwing more fire on it 🔥🔥 Who knew being awkward could be so much fun? 😅 #awkwardturtle
4 months ago
Share →: The first person to throw out bath water: Uh oh.

Commentary:
Looks like someone just invented the original form of "drop the mic" moment in history! 💦🛁😄 #OopsieDaisies
Jan 22, 2025
Share →: In my 20s: I’m gonna live forever! In my 40s: uh oh!

Commentary:
Ah, the classic progression from eternal optimism to slightly panicked realism! 🤣🕺 As they say, age brings wisdom… and sometimes a few extra grey hairs along the way! 👴💭 #AgingGracefully

For even more funny uh quotes, check out the next page, if available 👇

All funny uh quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2415 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,577

Funny Quotes Topics

15,246

Funny Quotes Images

12,577

6 minutes ago

3,434

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇿 has bookmarked:

Sometimes I look deep into my colleagues’ eyes to check if you really can’t see the back of their skulls.

Someone from 🇧🇯 has bookmarked:

My husband and I fell in love at first sight. Maybe I should have taken a second look.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has copied:

You know it’s been a successful Thanksgiving when your clothes no longer fit.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has bookmarked:

Hey! Remember in the first grade when we were all just chilling and then some kid would throw up out of nowhere?

Someone from 🇲🇲 has copied:

Agriculture can’t possibly be a dying industry. Bot farms are booming.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has viewed:

My head is starting to get dented from hitting rock bottom so often.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has bookmarked:

Don’t ever get excited if your kid likes a new food. They won’t like it tomorrow.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has downloaded:

At least men and women can agree on one thing: it feels amazing to take a bra off.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has bookmarked:

I set up my Nativity scene, but since baby Jesus hasn’t arrived yet, Mary, Joseph and all the Wise Men are just looking down at their phones.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has downloaded:

Ok, hear me out: a reality show where billionaire CEOs have to live off of their lowest-paid employees’ salaries for a month.

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on LinkedIn:

I want to be so rich that when I see a spider in my house I won’t kill it, I’d buy another house.

Just shared via X:

If I ever go missing, check the snack aisle. I’m probably just deciding.

Shared recently on Twitch:

Went on a date with a guy who didn’t ask me any questions about myself, so it’s on him when he finds out about my husband.

Going viral on Snapchat:

We’re all in the billionaire submarine now.

Breaking via TikTok:

The first 7 days of the week aren’t for me.

Spreading quickly via Facebook:

I only go for nature walks with people I can outrun.

Just shared via YouTube:

I switched from coffee to orange juice and told my doctor I felt better. He said it’s the vitamin C and natural sugars, but I think it’s the vodka.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

Spotify: enjoy the next 30 minutes commercial free. Also Spotify: we have no concept of time.

Making waves on Telegram:

As you get older, nothing loses its sting more than an authority figure saying they are disappointed in you. Like, I don’t know what to tell you, dude, we can’t both live in the prison of your expectations.

Spotted on Telegram:

Just got emotional imagining a worm emerging from its cocoon as a dragonfly and then got even more emotional remembering that’s not what they do.

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