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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇲 has copied:

Gonna mess with my husband by texting “send nudes” when he’s in a work meeting.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has downloaded:

Not gonna lie, the age I’m turning this year sounds a little serious, and I don’t like it.

Someone from 🇱🇾 has viewed:

Looking forward to eight hours of trying to get four hours of sleep tonight.

Someone from 🇵🇦 has copied:

It really annoys me when people use the wrong word and don’t have the humidity to admit it.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has downloaded:

Life always has it’s ups and downs. I like to up the music, down the drinks, and then relax and enjoy.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has downloaded:

How do you know I’m not just a figment of your imagination?

Someone from 🇳🇬 has copied:

Children really brighten up a home. They never turn the lights off, …

Someone from 🇪🇬 has copied:

All our dogs think we quit our jobs to spend more time with them. All our cats think we got fired for being lazy.

Someone from 🇹🇭 has downloaded:

Starting the second half of your sandwich is like “hell yeah, baby, let’s run it back!”

Someone from 🇸🇲 has copied:

I don’t flirt, I just say weird things and hope something sticks.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

804 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,966

Funny Quotes Topics

13,930

Funny Quotes Images

10,966

Updated

5 minutes ago

Users Online

3,440

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Reddit:

I bought a little notebook to keep track of who’s above the law.

Spotted on Reddit:

You’re either really good at wrapping presents or you’re really beautiful and funny. It’s one or the other.

Going viral on Facebook:

I really think tossing and turning at night should be counted as exercise.

Just landed via Threads:

You know you got a bad haircut when she insists on giving you a $10 discount.

Going viral on X:

Hey cell phone companies who play smooth jazz hold music hoping I’ll lose interest and give up: yeah, it’s kinda working.

Just shared via Reddit:

All positions for annoying people in my life have been filled. Applicants need not apply, thank you.

Just shared via Facebook:

Why the hell is my laundry bin always full? I’m not even going anywhere.

Shared recently on Messenger:

A treadmill minute is four times as long as a sleep minute.

Trending via TikTok:

We got our carpet cleaned today, so I’m just waiting for the dog to throw up.

Spotted on Twitch:

Took the road less travelled after buying the sat nav less expensive.

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

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Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media need people procrastination relationship sarcasm social someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

804 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

10,966

Funny Quotes Topics

13,930

Funny Quotes Images

10,966

Updated

5 minutes ago

Users Online

3,432

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇸 has bookmarked:

Have to write a note to my kid’s first grade teacher, and now I’m stressed out about my handwriting.

Someone from 🇶🇦 has downloaded:

Every day I ask ChatGPT if it knows where my keys are and if it ever knows the answer, I’m suing everybody.

Someone from 🇧🇩 has shared:

More dangerous than a lion that roars is a woman gone silent.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has bookmarked:

I’m like … if parking too far away from the curb was a person.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has downloaded:

The echo in my house when it’s clean is unsettling. Better order more stuff.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has copied:

You can always tell when a man is dating someone new. Why you going to the aquarium and the museum?

Someone from 🇭🇳 has copied:

Flossed the day before a dentist appointment like I was cramming for a history test.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has copied:

Sometimes a lover girl, sometimes a dinosaur.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has shared:

As I’m cleaning my room, this is a friendly reminder that you actually don’t need that free t-shirt or tote bag from that event.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has copied:

I’m an over-explainer (I explain things too much).

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on X:

The day I start waking up early it’s over for you all.

Broadcasted on WeChat:

When I retire, I’m going to run for office.

Making waves on Reddit:

My thighs are bigger than my chances in life.

Broadcasted on X:

Fall in love? I can barely fall asleep.

Broadcasted on LinkedIn:

If you think my heart is cold, you should feel my feet.

Live now on WhatsApp:

I aspire to be a stay-at-home mom with no kids.

Live now on YouTube:

It was so windy today when I was walking to the gym that I got blown into the wine store.

Going viral on WeChat:

Forget tagging friends, I want to be able to tag my enemies.

Spotted on Reddit:

My superpower is embarrassing myself.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

People who live in glass houses should be put on a watchlist.

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