Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇻🇺 has shared:

Why do fruit flies be everywhere but at the supermarket? Ain’t that like their Golden Corral?

Someone from 🇸🇱 has bookmarked:

You look like the kind of person whose recorded calls have been used for training purposes.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has shared:

Hey babe, wanna come over and fold me like a fitted sheet?

Someone from 🇲🇱 has copied:

I keep pressing the space bar, but I’m still on Earth.

Someone from 🇧🇦 has viewed:

I worry a lot about the wild animals in my neighborhood, but I’m beginning to think they don’t worry about me.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has viewed:

Gonna finish eating all these Christmas cookies so I’m no longer tempted to eat them.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has bookmarked:

“It’s not that deep!” Well, I have a shovel and I enjoy digging for meaning.

Someone from 🇸🇹 has viewed:

It’s almost time to put winter tires on the struggle bus.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has shared:

Having sex with the same person gets freakier and nastier each time.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has viewed:

Only after moving in together do you realize your girlfriend’s little quirks. Mine, for example, stores vegetables in the beer compartment.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,623

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on WeChat:

Job interview: Where do you see yourself in five years? Me: Hopefully on a sabbatical.

Breaking via Messenger:

No one is more surprised than my kids every night when I say it’s bed time.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

No one lies more than a parent who says, “We’ll see.” You know we’re not seeing anything.

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

I bought a bag of M&M’s and they don’t have M’s anymore. They all have W’s, for woke.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

I’m the kind of introvert who dodges phone calls but sends paragraphs in texts.

Freshly posted on Snapchat:

I’m sorry you had a bad experience at our restaurant. To make it up to you, here is a coupon for more of our terrible, terrible food.

Shared recently on Instagram:

You know when a donkey followed Shrek home and just kept talking? That’s what it’s like having kids.

Spreading quickly via Telegram:

I overthink, therefore I am.

Shared recently on Reddit:

Instagram is just Twitter for people who go outside.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

And so ends another week without me getting rich unexpectedly.

Funny unfriended quotes

Funny unfriended quotes bring a hilarious twist to those awkward social media moments when friendships take an unexpected turn 😂💔 Whether it’s a cheeky comeback or a lighthearted jab, these quotes turn unfriending into pure comedy gold 🎭✨ Ready to laugh off the drama and scroll with a smile? Let’s dive into the funniest ways to say goodbye (without actually saying it) 😎📱

New funny unfriended quotes 👇

All funny unfriended quotes & images can be used for free for non-commercial purposes 👌

New Funny Quotes
🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

48 shares on Threads this month:

Nothing betrays your age more than the slang you refuse to let go of.

37 shares on Messenger this month:

Don’t judge me. I was born to be awesome, not perfect.

54 shares on Messenger this month:

The difference between a hippo and a zippo is that one is really heavy and the other is a little lighter. Thank you and good night.

39 shares on Messenger this month:

I can’t believe the gall of this bladder.

58 shares on Instagram this month:

The title of my autobiography is going to be ‘You’d Think I’d Learn By Now, But Nope.’

39 shares on YouTube this month:

You can have glossy lips or you can have a cat. You can’t have both.

19 shares on Slack this month:

Not being able to fall asleep is so embarrassing. All I’m asking my brain to do is nothing and it can’t even do that?

75 shares on Snapchat this month:

No, I mean, it’s great toast. I just didn’t expect it to be French.

33 shares on WeChat this month:

Okay, this is getting ridiculous. It can’t just be the one guy. It’s gotta be a group of people pooping my son’s diaper.

95 shares on Slack this month:

I miss being the age where the most devastating thing in the world was when my sandwiches got cut into squares instead of triangles.

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Adult friendships are like, “hey girl, let’s keep rescheduling to hangout until one of us dies.”

22 folks are currently checking 👀

I’m lacking vitamin c-ash.

10 folks are currently checking 👀

Aliens only abduct the people that are already nuts so no one will believe them when they try and tell everyone.

12 folks are currently checking 👀

My outfit is from Gucci and the body from Ferrero.

7 folks are currently checking 👀

In an effort to keep the employees motivated and increase morale, my boss has asked me to stop talking to everyone.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

I love how you get on Twitter, and all your thoughts are already in someone else’s tweet.

17 folks are currently checking 👀

If he has other girls who make him smile, be different and make him cry.

9 folks are currently checking 👀

I’ll never understand why the volume in movies is always mixed in such a way that you can barely understand the dialog and your neighbor gets war flashbacks during action scenes.

18 folks are currently checking 👀

I just paid my taxes. The roads should be fixed any day now.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

My skin is so dry it’s doing a PowerPoint presentation.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

105 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,374

Funny Quotes Topics

17,485

Funny Quotes Images

15,374

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,656

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇫🇲 has viewed:

People in my real life annoy me, so I come online to annoy you.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has copied:

I started calling the new guy at work “Grok” because he thinks he knows everything.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has bookmarked:

You will see blonder children than you would ever think possible at expensive ice cream parlours.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has copied:

I am on my second week of biweekly pay so today I will be showing you how to make a quesadilla out of paper towels.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has downloaded:

I hate it when what’s wrong asks me what’s wrong.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has copied:

You are my favorite dirty thought.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has downloaded:

I used to judge cat owners for giving in to their pets’ whims too easily, but holy shit, these animals are relentless and would starve themselves to organ failure just because one time, weeks ago, they had a taste of some ‘better’ food.

Someone from 🇹🇹 has bookmarked:

Putting my Christmas tree up today. Big day for my cats.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has bookmarked:

I smile at all animals, just not the human ones.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has downloaded:

Crazy how many organs in your body are dedicated to the poopification of dinner.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via YouTube:

It’s so much easier to suggest solutions when you don’t know too much about the problem.

Just shared via Discord:

Everyone has these three colleagues: The one who is always cold. The one who is always hungry. The one who is always tired. I am everything in one.

Making waves on Threads:

The day your kids stop waking up early on the weekend is the same day your body stops letting you sleep in.

Just shared via Messenger:

Hot wings have killed many people starting with a dude named Icarus.

Trending via Discord:

Should we all just give up and get really into drugs? Wait, this is literally what happened in the 60s. That just clicked for me.

Just landed via Twitch:

And then there are people who can only sleep on their back because their pea brain could slip out of their ear if they lie on their side.

Just landed via Instagram:

Welcome to the internet, where people are confidently wrong all the time.

Breaking via Discord:

The easiest way to bundle your home and auto insurance is to live in your car.

Live now on Pinterest:

Amazing if accurate: bleeding money.

Trending via Pinterest:

“I’m basically the human version of finding $20 in old jeans.”

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