Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇭 has bookmarked:

Clubbing is a phase that you must go through and get over.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has shared:

Life begins when you can afford it.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has shared:

“Easy like Sunday morning” is something people with no kids say.

Someone from 🇮🇹 has copied:

Some people believe the appendix is a vestigial organ, that its use has long since passed. I think it’s primordial. Its use has yet to come.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has downloaded:

Bison may look friend-shaped, but they already have all the friends they want. Keep your distance and don’t make it awkward.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has viewed:

Guy on the day of the 1918 armistice, walking around the trench, clapping, saying things like “Great work, everyone,” and “We did it, team.”

Someone from 🇦🇲 has bookmarked:

Do mens sneezes get louder and louder as they age until they explode?

Someone from 🇸🇲 has copied:

Being a toddler’s favorite person is what real love actually looks like.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has viewed:

I have an addiction to pattern recognition.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has bookmarked:

Home is where you trust the toilet seats.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,607

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

Tweeting shouldn’t cost money but it should flip you on your back like a bug for 15 minutes.

Going viral on WhatsApp:

Is it just me, or were we promised a totally different frog-to-prince ratio?

Breaking via Messenger:

I think I look pretty okay for my age. It’s just when I hold menus two feet from my face that I know the ruse is up.

Going viral on Threads:

My dog pisses on every election sign regardless of political party so I have no idea who he is voting for.

Live now on Threads:

I’m not easily offended, but I am easily annoyed.

Just landed via Threads:

Some people are like wallpaper… same pattern repeating every time.

Just landed via TikTok:

Every time I have to leave the house and be around people I remember why I hate having to leave the house and be around people.

Broadcasted on WhatsApp:

I’m so high at Home Depot right now, and I have to ask where the hose at. And I know I’mma laugh when I do.

Going bananas on Messenger:

The word “misread” can be misread as “misread.”

Live now on Twitch:

Sweet, but twisted. Does that make me a candy cane?

Funny uninvited guest quotes

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Funny Quotes Collections
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Social Media Stars ⭐

25 shares on Discord this month:

Instead of saying “Good morning,” my wife and I go straight into explanations of how badly we each slept.

23 shares on TikTok this month:

The problem with parental controls is I need my kid to help me figure out how to set them up.

44 shares on Reddit this month:

In the 80s, you could literally shrink your kids with a shrink-ray, and your wife wouldn’t divorce you. I’m pretty sure I saw a documentary film about it.

37 shares on Discord this month:

“This isn’t going to end well for you.” Me, alone in the house, to the cake on the counter.

74 shares on X this month:

Traumatized people will navigate emergency situations with calm surety but then have an anxiety attack in a grocery store.

72 shares on Facebook this month:

In your 20s, there will be a cat, and it is very important to get that cat and spend so much money on it.

98 shares on X this month:

If I’m ever murdered, I don’t want two women with a podcast solving the case in their spare time.

79 shares on Snapchat this month:

Why does the dentist have to take an x-ray of my teeth? They right there, bro!

30 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I like it when it’s raining, because I can hold my umbrella really low and it makes everyone headless.

56 shares on Discord this month:

Can someone please just give me a participation trophy for making it through today, please?

Trending Topics 📁

activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Hot Jokes 💥

5 folks are currently checking 👀

According to the web, caffeine deficiency is a life threatening condition for people around you.

8 folks are currently checking 👀

Sometimes people come into your life — and they need to stop doing that.

6 folks are currently checking 👀

Parenting a teenager is surreal because you’ll be sitting there, and some dude who is much taller than you will walk around the corner and ask you how to open a popcorn bag.

20 folks are currently checking 👀

People who have apartment windows that face the street and put their Christmas trees in them, thank you for your service.

24 folks are currently checking 👀

If you’re not getting spoiled, then spoil yourself.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

Great minds think alike. Unfortunately, so do stupid ones.

11 folks are currently checking 👀

Is it socially acceptable to wear pajamas all day if you’re constantly holding a coffee cup?

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Not pretty enough for Instagram, not funny enough for Twitter. Welcome to WhatsApp status.

21 folks are currently checking 👀

Who you are when someone reaches over to take food from your plate… is the real you.

19 folks are currently checking 👀

I wish there was a nicer way to say “my natural tendency to spot patterns is making me feel very uncomfortable about you”.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

calculating…

Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,584

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇹 has shared:

People who talk about fruit having too much sugar scare me so bad. Please get back, you wicked witch!

Someone from 🇹🇿 has copied:

Turns out my superpower is the ability to go into incredible detail in completely the wrong direction.

Someone from 🇹🇯 has bookmarked:

In other news, congrats to my therapist for securing a 4 year contract with me.

Someone from 🇺🇦 has copied:

The thing I bought on Etsy in 2017 has shipped.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has viewed:

I am convinced that some of you are failed experiments that gained sentience and escaped from a lab.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has downloaded:

Just got revenge on someone who wronged me many, many years ago. Never relax, I’m coming.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has shared:

I’m at a point in life where I’m just at a point.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has shared:

“Stand up for yourself!” Girl, I have low iron.

Someone from 🇯🇲 has bookmarked:

“You’re an adult, maybe it’s time to stop fighting with people on the internet.”

Someone from 🇸🇷 has copied:

I hate when I gain 10 pounds for a role and then realize I’m not an actor.

Social Media Log 💫

Trending via Messenger:

They’re releasing another “Jurassic” movie. Let me guess: The dinosaurs get loose.

Trending via X:

In my defense, Your Honor, I was left unsupervised.

Trending via Snapchat:

I’m still tired from yesterday’s tired.

Freshly posted on Threads:

I’d rather you don’t watch me while I’m liking my own post.

Shared recently on Discord:

Yeah, sex is great, but have you ever checked your bank account and had way more money than you expected.

Shared recently on YouTube:

I’m a big believer in not going to work on your birthday!

Live now on WhatsApp:

Every girl is defined by their one lost love. And by that I mean the one fast food item that was discontinued without warning, subsequently ruining their life.

Shared recently on Slack:

There should be a variant of fencing with two guys trying to kiss one another.

Making waves on Facebook:

I wonder how long you could drive in a roundabout before a cop would be like, hey, you can’t do that anymore.

Just landed via Discord:

Anti-capitalism is just code for “I don’t know how anything works.”

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