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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇩🇰 has copied:

I’ve officially reached the age where I don’t want to do anything after 9pm.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has viewed:

Actors in black and white movies were often putting their lives in danger during driving scenes, as they weren’t able to tell if the traffic light was red or green.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has copied:

Sisters are so important. How else would my mom find out all the stuff I didn’t want her to know.

Someone from 🇴🇲 has shared:

Sorry I can’t have a pleasant, safe and affordable life, my government said no.

Someone from 🇰🇷 has copied:

Fish must think we look so weird with both eyes on the front of our face.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has shared:

Pet owners be like “this is my pet Snoopy, but their nicknames are Booboo and Thicky Boy!”

Someone from 🇱🇧 has downloaded:

I like you because we hate the same people.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has bookmarked:

Mud season creeps up on us every year, destroying hearts and minds as well as light grey carpeting.

Someone from 🇸🇪 has shared:

Who needs a dominatrix when you can be beaten up by an automatically retracting vacuum cleaner cable?

Someone from 🇳🇦 has shared:

I won’t rest until a cure for insomnia is found.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2382 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,544

Funny Quotes Topics

15,227

Funny Quotes Images

12,544

Updated

3 hours ago

Users Online

3,455

Social Media Log 💫

Reported on Discord:

Have you ever met the human version of a headache?

Just shared via Snapchat:

Why do my kids have Veteran’s Day off, they haven’t done shit.

Going viral on Facebook:

Back to work after the long holiday weekend, so you’re finally away from the relatives you don’t like, and back with the co-workers you don’t like.

Just shared via Twitch:

Sorry I’m late. My catapult malfunctioned.

Going viral on TikTok:

Quitting my job to focus on decorating the tree.

Spreading quickly via WhatsApp:

There should be a special rating system for movies that tells you how uncomfortable you’ll be if you watch them with your parents.

Just landed via YouTube:

Aubrey Plaza is like an alien who went to earth to study us but accidentally got famous and can’t leave.

Just landed via X:

I was really happy about it being Friday until I realized it was only Wednesday.

Seen just now on Facebook:

Sorry for what I said when I was drunk. I meant every word.

Making waves on Instagram:

Netflix be like “we know exactly what movie you talkin’ ’bout but we ain’t got it lol”.

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Funny witch trial quotes

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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activity communication day food frustration fun humor i irony joke just know life love me media people procrastination relationship sarcasm social social media someone technology time want work

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2382 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,544

Funny Quotes Topics

15,227

Funny Quotes Images

12,544

Updated

3 hours ago

Users Online

3,445

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇧🇾 has copied:

True bravery is getting a text from a woman with three questions in it, and only responding to one.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has shared:

My favorite childhood memory is having energy.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has copied:

My kids are asking for another dog that I can feed and walk.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has downloaded:

“You live and you learn!” Bro, I don’t want to do either of those things.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has copied:

When life closes a door, just open it again. It’s a door, that’s how they work.

Someone from 🇳🇦 has bookmarked:

As a child, all I wanted was as to be a time traveller, like my grandson and his grandson before him.

Someone from 🇨🇺 has bookmarked:

Do we barbecue with women or without salad?

Someone from 🇸🇧 has shared:

I don’t have red flags, I have fun facts.

Someone from 🇱🇻 has viewed:

WhatsApp calls should indicate whose internet is poor to avoid unnecessary arguments.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has copied:

My sleeping cycle is completely backwards. In the morning I feel sleepy and at night I can’t fall asleep.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Instagram:

My husband pissed me off so I wrapped his remote and put it under the tree.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

It’s crazy people waste their time with hobbies and family when there are strangers on the internet who need to be argued with.

Broadcasted on Reddit:

The older I get, the more I treat birthdays like one-night stands and just pretend they didn’t happen.

Trending via Facebook:

Managers want a week of silence and meditation in order to be even more of a manager afterwards.

Breaking via Pinterest:

I have a photographic memory, but I’ve run out of film.

Seen just now on Discord:

Every day, a new coworker asks if you’ve used ChatGPT, and the conversation doesn’t end if you say “No.”

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

I hate everyone in front of me at this checkout line, everyone behind me is cool.

Broadcasted on Snapchat:

You can’t fix stupid, but you can watch it in action on Facebook every day.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

My favourite adult hack is when I carefully and thoughtfully put something very important away so I can’t lose it, and then I never find it again.

Freshly posted on X:

Introverts have fun, too — we just don’t care if you know.

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