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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇲🇳 has viewed:

Instead of being constantly irritated by other people’s flaws, I’ve decided to become more self-absorbed.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has shared:

Spider-Man, but set in rural England so he just has to walk everywhere.

Someone from 🇬🇳 has copied:

Men with bibles names be the worst type of people.

Someone from 🇲🇩 has viewed:

If we were both crows, I’d bring you shiny things.

Someone from 🇱🇷 has bookmarked:

My goal is to do one thing each day that could prevent me from being elected to political office.

Someone from 🇯🇵 has bookmarked:

Body: Time to sleep. Brain: Hey, that’s an interesting thought, here’s six billion more.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has bookmarked:

I want a hot body, but I also want hot wings.

Someone from 🇧🇫 has viewed:

Guys have good pics on their dating profiles because their ex took them.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has downloaded:

When you turn 50, they change the lightbulb in your fridge to that memory eraser from Men in Black.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has viewed:

I try not to post too much, to give everyone else a better chance at being seen.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2316 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,478

Funny Quotes Topics

15,183

Funny Quotes Images

12,478

Updated

52 minutes ago

Users Online

3,441

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via Facebook:

Getting married soon. Just need a spouse.

Shared recently on Instagram:

Candy cigarettes really used to be a thing and we really bought them and walked around like we were smokers at the tender age of 6.

Spotted on Threads:

Don’t forget to brush your teeth, comb your hair, cleanse your face, and share my posts.

Spotted on Telegram:

Imagine being all knowing and still putting a snake in charge of apples.

Shared recently on Reddit:

There should be a day between Sunday and Monday called Hang on a Second.

Freshly posted on Twitch:

Nike: Just Do It! Me: I don’t want to.

Just shared via Snapchat:

If I text you at 8:10, you’re supposed to reply at 8:09.

Just shared via Discord:

Please hesitate to get in touch with me.

Breaking via Twitch:

Buying a new phone isn’t even satisfying anymore. It’s literally just your old phone with a haircut.

Seen just now on Instagram:

My friend says to me, “What rhymes with orange?” And I told him, “No, it doesn’t.”

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Funny worldwide quotes

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

2316 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

12,478

Funny Quotes Topics

15,183

Funny Quotes Images

12,478

Updated

52 minutes ago

Users Online

3,454

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

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Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇵🇹 has copied:

Mice after a breakup be like “we are not on squeaking terms”.

Someone from 🇪🇷 has downloaded:

If you ever go backpacking in the wilderness, be sure to wear corduroy pants, so you can start a fire if needed.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has viewed:

Anyone else who tells their pets every time they leave the house that they’ll be back soon?

Someone from 🇬🇪 has shared:

A real smart TV would increase the volume when you started eating chips.

Someone from 🇨🇾 has copied:

The best time to visit Japan is when you have money!

Someone from 🇬🇲 has viewed:

I think my new neighbors are creeps. They seem to be looking into my window every time I’m looking out my window to see what they are doing.

Someone from 🇩🇿 has bookmarked:

When someone asks me what my dream job is, it’s just like “I don’t know dude, I don’t dream about jobs”

Someone from 🇷🇼 has viewed:

Just checked my bank account. Looks like everyone’s getting a hug for Christmas.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has copied:

People who are on Twitter and put intelligent in their bio, good one.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has bookmarked:

Does anyone know if it’s possible to buy the transcripts of audiobooks? Thanks!

Social Media Log 💫

Broadcasted on Discord:

Haunted Houses this year are just gonna have the news on.

Making waves on X:

Are you okay, babe? You’ve barely moved in mysterious ways recently.

Just landed via Telegram:

If you fall asleep long enough, the steering wheel gives you a pillow.

Going viral on YouTube:

If your store’s bowl of water is just for pets, you should really put up a sign.

Seen just now on Telegram:

Most of Twitter could probably use a good bop on the nose with a rolled-up newspaper.

Making waves on Slack:

Every room is a panic room if someone farts.

Spotted on Discord:

Parenting a teenager is surreal because you’ll be sitting there, and some dude who is much taller than you will walk around the corner and ask you how to open a popcorn bag.

Freshly posted on Discord:

Channeling my inner forest ghost: hauntingly fabulous and slightly lost.

Trending via Instagram:

“I’m sure it’ll turn up” – Translation: I’m bored of helping you look.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

Some days you are the table and some days you are the toe.

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