Getting up early would be easier if we could keep our eyes closed.

Someone from 🇬🇼 has bookmarked:

God sends you an only child as a friend to test you.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has copied:

Wait, making the right choices is an option?!

Someone from 🇧🇿 has viewed:

Mud season creeps up on us every year, destroying hearts and minds as well as light grey carpeting.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has copied:

I hope I don’t die of something stupid like old age, I want a piano to fall on my head.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has copied:

Too young to retire, too poor to quit and too fat to strip – so let’s move on.

Someone from 🇨🇫 has bookmarked:

Just got emotional imagining a worm emerging from its cocoon as a dragonfly and then got even more emotional remembering that’s not what they do.

Someone from 🇭🇹 has copied:

It’s comical when I lean back in my chair only to realize it’s a stool.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has copied:

I have browser tabs open that are older than you.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has viewed:

I hate it when some random company refers to me as their “customer.” I’m like, look, we had one night of drunken shopping, we are not in a relationship.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has downloaded:

“Those tattoos will make it harder to get a job!” Okay, well so will my personality.