Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇸🇰 has viewed:

Home Depot should allow men over 40 to have birthday parties in their stores.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has downloaded:

Age regressing by coughing like a toddler, with my tongue out.

Someone from 🇦🇷 has shared:

If ever go missing, please only put pictures of me on the news where I look skinny and hot even if that means they won’t find me.

Someone from 🇰🇳 has copied:

I’m not ready to adopt a highway, I can barely raise my own driveway.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has downloaded:

Men shouldn’t be allowed to download any app other than Wikipedia.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has viewed:

Everyone is posting their vacation pictures and I’m like… I went shopping.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has bookmarked:

Strict parents raise good liars.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has downloaded:

When someone asks me if my twins are natural, I tell them no they’re robots.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has bookmarked:

God: “I’m all-knowing but I’d rather be all-forgetting.”

Someone from 🇱🇧 has copied:

I don’t need to grow a thick skin. The world needs to grow fewer thorns.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

1761 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

11,923

Funny Quotes Topics

14,738

Funny Quotes Images

11,923

4 minutes ago

3,434

Social Media Log 💫

Breaking via Threads:

You know when a donkey followed Shrek home and just kept talking? That’s what it’s like having kids.

Just landed via Reddit:

When you’re young, weekends are for fun. When you’re older, they’re for recovery.

Just shared via YouTube:

Gonorrhea would’ve been a great name for diarrhea medicine.

Just landed via Instagram:

“I asked ChatGPT,” “I asked Grok,” yeah, well, I wipe away the hours conversing with the flowers.

Shared recently on YouTube:

A treadmill minute is four times as long as a sleep minute.

Freshly posted on X:

Hate when anxiety gives me stomach problems. Like, baby, you are supposed to be a mental disorder, please stay in your line.

Reported on TikTok:

I do block people right away; you’re not going to stress me out on my own phone, with my own internet, and in my own house.

Making waves on TikTok:

Printers are definitely the moody teenagers of the tech world.

Going viral on Telegram:

I don’t always leave the house, but when I do, I shouldn’t.

Going viral on Pinterest:

Another day waiting, and wishing, and wanting.

I love being married. It’s so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.

5 months ago

I love being married. It’s so great to find that one special person you want to annoy for the rest of your life.

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Marriage is like having a permanent 'annoyance buddy' for life. It's a unique bond where you get to irritate each other in the most loving way possible. Who knew annoyance could be so endearing?"

annoy, commitment, humor, life, love, marriage, person, relationship, special, special person

Response

Username: BreezyQuokka Full Name:

Feb 25, 2025

😂”So, the secret to a happy marriage is finally out! It’s not just finding the ‘one,’ but finding the ‘one’ sturdy enough to bear our fun-loving annoyances for a lifetime. May we all be so lucky (or perhaps unlucky for that special one! 😉).”

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

New Funny Quotes

Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

1761 added this month

Funny Quotes Total

11,923

Funny Quotes Topics

14,738

Funny Quotes Images

11,923

4 minutes ago

3,424

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇳 has downloaded:

Welcome to your 50s: You’re not attracted to anyone who likes you.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has viewed:

Life is pretty much just a series of awkward and embarrassing moments, separated by snacks.

Someone from 🇼🇸 has viewed:

Roses are red. Daisies are white. I’m in a grumpy mood. My underwear is too tight.

Someone from 🇷🇺 has bookmarked:

Your car antlers tell me everything I need to know about you.

Someone from 🇫🇲 has viewed:

Girls love a gay best friend until he turns 35 and asks to borrow your womb.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has copied:

If a company’s hiring sign says, “Come grow with us,” you’re about to do the job of 3-5 people.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has viewed:

You’re not stuck in traffic. You are traffic.

Someone from 🇨🇱 has downloaded:

How about hold me as tight as you’re holding onto that grudge?

Someone from 🇹🇻 has shared:

Is Craigslist still around, or did everyone over there get murdered?

Someone from 🇨🇲 has copied:

I told ChatGPT about us.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via TikTok:

Today I bought a doughnut without sprinkles. This diet thing is hard.

Spotted on Reddit:

If you don’t like sports, you are missing a whole world of easy-going conversations with complete strangers.

Trending via X:

I nearly broke my toe because the coffee table didn’t look where it was going.

Trending via WeChat:

I changed my alarm clock sound to an applause, it’s the least I deserve for waking up at 7am.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

I love that my dog always comes home from the groomer wearing a bandana. It’s like he was only gone for three hours, but joined a gang in that time.

Trending via Instagram:

The thing about being 50+ is that whenever an opportunity to pee is available – you’re wise to take it.

Making waves on Discord:

The crematorium is my last hope for a hot body.

Spotted on WeChat:

Once I find a dragon, y’all are toast.

Trending via Snapchat:

That awkward moment when you’re about to leave work and your boss says “before you go”.

Just landed via YouTube:

I’ve heard that people who don’t have Facebook use their free time to lie naked on top of each other. Ew, imagine that.

Share Wordgag 🙏

© 2025. All rights reserved.

Made with ❤️ in Sydney ☀️🌴