Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
🎄🐱 "If cats could send Christmas cards, they wouldn’t. They’d probably just swat them off the table and demand more treats instead. Typical feline divas! 😼 #MeowyChristmas"

card, cat, Christmas, Christmas card, gift, holiday, humor, independence, sarcasm

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I drive home so quick after work like I’m late for the house.

0

2 months ago

after, drive, home, house, humor, i, late, quick, rush, work
Imagine hating me and I don’t notice.

0

2 months ago

hate, humor, i, imagine, irony, me, notice, oblivious, sarcasm
The worst thing about wearing headphones is when you hallucinate people shouting you. Like, why does this happen?

0

2 months ago

experience, hallucination, headphones, humor, isolation, music, people, perception, shouting, thing, why, worst
I’m trying to quit making sexual innuendos but it’s so hard.

0

2 months ago

comedy, hard, humor, innuendo, joke, making, quit, sexual, sexuality, struggle, trying
I recently discovered “movies.” They’re usually like an hour and a half long, and a pretty good way to kill time. Check it out.

0

1 month ago

activity, check, discovery, entertainment, fun, good, half, hour, humor, i, kill, movie, pretty, time
Goodnight to the men who know one woman is enough. The rest can get sleep paralysis.

0

2 months ago

enough, goodnight, humor, jealousy, know, man, men, paralysis, relationship, rest, sleep, sleep paralysis, woman

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

21 shares on Facebook this month:

I need like twelve incomes for this lifestyle I have in my head.

94 shares on Discord this month:

If you see me sad, just hug me and put some money in my pocket.

14 shares on Instagram this month:

Babe, are you okay? You’ve barely responded to my telepathic messages.

46 shares on Snapchat this month:

A beautiful woman should never have to send an email. Yet, such tragedies occur every day.

90 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Take your days off, these jobs don’t care about you.

25 shares on WhatsApp this month:

“Doing the dishes” is completely pointless and only wastes water. You’re just going to put food on them again in a few hours.

20 shares on Messenger this month:

So it turns out that being an adult is mostly just Googling how to do stuff.

41 shares on Threads this month:

My funeral better have a bloody merch table.

93 shares on Reddit this month:

If there is a God and He “loves” us, then explain snakes.

29 shares on Threads this month:

Sunday is my favorite day to invent new things to worry about.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇱🇦 has copied:

The only time your man will surprise you is when you specifically tell him what you want.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has viewed:

Thank God for headphones and day dreaming.

Someone from 🇷🇼 has shared:

My husband keeps borrowing and losing my tweezers, so I’m naming this chin hair after him.

Someone from 🇱🇹 has downloaded:

Occupation: the ugly friend!

Someone from 🇹🇭 has downloaded:

Bands are always like “here’s another song”. Yeah, no shit, that’s pretty much all you do.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has copied:

Karma has taught me to never laugh at a stranger being attacked by a seagull.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has viewed:

If I’m out drinking and “Push It” starts playing, take me home immediately.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has shared:

The female rage of having so much to say but refusing to say it, cause their emotional intelligence is too low for them to comprehend it.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has viewed:

No amount of daylight can save us.

Someone from 🇲🇿 has copied:

Life tip: if nothing goes right, go to sleep.

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on LinkedIn:

Still waiting for aliens to abduct me, which feels pretty rude considering I’ve been dressed and ready for years.

Shared recently on WeChat:

Females be cheating in healthy relationships, but are faithful in toxic ones.

Live now on Instagram:

Silk is a crazy material. “I like your shirt,” thanks. It came out of a bug.

Spotted on Slack:

The best part about NYC is you literally see a brand new, hottest woman in your entire life every single day.

Seen just now on WhatsApp:

My sleeping cycle is completely backwards. In the morning I feel sleepy and at night I can’t fall asleep.

Spotted on Messenger:

“I made this with AI.” Yeah, we can tell.

Shared recently on Instagram:

Banks should have a gold bar that you can go in and touch when you feel poor.

Seen just now on Snapchat:

I could never be in the mafia, those guys stay up way to late.

Freshly posted on X:

Always keep a bottle of wine in the fridge for special occasions. Like Wednesday.

Freshly posted on Slack:

And where did Mr. Pepper receive his degree from exactly?

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

If cats could send Christmas cards, they wouldn’t.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

I drive home so quick after work like I’m late for the house.

Imagine hating me and I don’t notice.

The worst thing about wearing headphones is when you hallucinate people shouting you. Like, why does this happen?

I’m trying to quit making sexual innuendos but it’s so hard.

I recently discovered “movies.” They’re usually like an hour and a half long, and a pretty good way to kill time. Check it out.

Goodnight to the men who know one woman is enough. The rest can get sleep paralysis.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨