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10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇿 has copied:

You’re never too old to shout, “Mooooo,” when you drive past some cows.

Someone from 🇸🇲 has downloaded:

Hiring a mortician to do my makeup while I sleep.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has bookmarked:

If you really think about it, extraordinary isn’t that great. It’s just an extra helping of ordinary.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has copied:

The fewer the people, the greater the inner peace.

Someone from 🇪🇨 has bookmarked:

Being sexy is just the cherry on top. I’m actually a genius and the sweetest girl ever.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has copied:

Sorry, can’t go out tonight. My bed told me it needs me, and I can’t let it down.

Someone from 🇵🇰 has viewed:

The more I parent the more convinced I am that the ears on toddlers are purely for decoration.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has copied:

I bought a robot vacuum today. Named it “Dustbin Bieber”.

Someone from 🇳🇪 has shared:

Work from home is all fun and games until you lose grip on reality.

Someone from 🇹🇱 has shared:

Blocking him isn’t enough. I want his favorite sports team to finish last every year for now and forever.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

297 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,566

Funny Quotes Topics

17,623

Funny Quotes Images

15,566

Updated

Jan 11, 2026

Users Online

3,368

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via TikTok:

The best way to enjoy your tea while the world is falling apart around you is to remember that the world has always been falling apart around you.

Spreading quickly via Slack:

I will never be the person this serving size suggestion wants me to be.

Going bananas on Telegram:

Bought an eggplant, imma grow my own eggs.

Just landed via LinkedIn:

Patience is something you admire in the driver behind you, but not in the one ahead.

Shared recently on Twitch:

Watermelon. The fruit that comes with a workout.

Going viral on TikTok:

Grateful for independence mostly because British food is gross.

I’m old enough to remember when regular websites were usable.

4 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Ah, yes, the golden age of the internet—where everything loaded faster than I could remember my passwords! 🌐💾😅

age, enough, humor, internet, nostalgia, old, regular, remember, usability, website, websites

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Boyfriends come and go… reply guys stay forever. Against your will, even.

2 months ago

boyfriend, dating, even, forever, guy, guys, humor, internet, media, meme, persistence, relationship, reply, reply guy, social, social media, stay
I take issue with furniture that deliberately moves 1 inch when you’re in a rush to get by.

2 months ago

annoyance, design, furniture, humor, i, inconvenience, issue, movement, moves, rush, take
If you ever ask a teen to do something and they just say “sure” without arguing, check that they haven’t been replaced with an android.

2 months ago

Android, arguing, check, communication, ever, humor, just, parenting, sarcasm, say, something, sure, technology, teen
Meds have done more for me than any man ever could.

2 months ago

dependency, done, ever, expectations, growth, health, humor, man, me, meds, mental, mental health, personal, personal growth, relationships, self-care
Why didn’t Scooby Doo smell that the ghosts were human?

2 months ago

cartoon, doo, ghost, ghosts, human, humor, joke, mystery, scooby, Scooby Doo, smell
Tornadoes are the most relaxing things in the news.

2 months ago

humor, irony, news, relaxing, things, tornado

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

56 shares on YouTube this month:

I’m just going to be hotter. It’s easier than being nicer.

51 shares on YouTube this month:

Zelda was easier as a kid because if you hit a hard puzzle, you could just wait a few days for more brain matter to come in, but now it’s the opposite.

100 shares on Snapchat this month:

Welcome to your 40s—you run out of breath trying to find your running shoes.

55 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Nobody is more stressed than a person who has a lot of interests or passions and is still confused about their career.

23 shares on Threads this month:

Not the sharpest cheddar on the charcuterie board.

18 shares on WeChat this month:

For Halloween, I wanna be loved.

68 shares on Threads this month:

Parenting a teenager is surreal because you’ll be sitting there, and some dude who is much taller than you will walk around the corner and ask you how to open a popcorn bag.

19 shares on YouTube this month:

I keep screenshots the way my husband keeps old cords, stored neatly away until the day I might need them.

25 shares on LinkedIn this month:

Next time someone says “I’m a hugger” and tries to hug me I’m gonna say “I’m a biter” and see how it goes.

58 shares on Telegram this month:

There should be a “Take Your Friend to Work Day,” so we can actually see what our friends do all day and meet the characters from all their work stories.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇬🇪 has bookmarked:

You know who’s gonna love you in the end? Your dog.

Someone from 🇫🇷 has bookmarked:

Life is giving me no lemons. It’s throwing watermelons.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has bookmarked:

I’ve been closer to death than a stable relationship.

Someone from 🇲🇰 has downloaded:

Going to ragebait men by asking, “Do you ever wish you were tall?”

Someone from 🇹🇳 has copied:

Every time I turn around, it’s Monday.

Someone from 🇵🇬 has copied:

No revenge, but I hope you stutter every time you try to dirty talk with someone.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has downloaded:

Why do these women want to date Pete Davidson, a funny movie star, and not me, a guy who is whining?

Someone from 🇬🇷 has copied:

Welcome to Twitter: yeah, none of us can sleep either.

Someone from 🇹🇷 has downloaded:

Having a crush on a girl makes you think things like, yes, let me make more money.

Someone from 🇳🇿 has viewed:

Do people exist who manage to wash, dry, fold, and put away their laundry in the same day?

Social Media Log 💫

Spotted on Instagram:

I find as I get older it’s the little things that bring me joy. Like embarrassing my children.

Broadcasted on TikTok:

I’m officially at the age where I’m not upgrading my phone until it stops working.

Just landed via Instagram:

It’s not my fault that when I said you looked “stunning” you assumed I meant in a positive way.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

And are the people who find you “hilarious” in the room with us now?

Making waves on TikTok:

The only thing preventing me from moving to Finland is the language barrier and a job.

Freshly posted on X:

Limbo is the only sport where being really bad at it means you’re raising the bar.

Trending via Threads:

It’s funny how sometimes you buy a book, then read it in two days, and sometimes you buy a book, and it lives on your bookshelf for 12 years.

Going viral on Discord:

Can’t wait for the day off from work so I can sit on the couch at home and stare at the TV screen while thinking about work.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

“American Pope” sounds like the name of an Amazon prime original series you ignore.

Just landed via YouTube:

I just cleaned the house top to bottom, so now I’m gonna need everybody to stop living here.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

I’m old enough to remember when regular websites were usable.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Boyfriends come and go… reply guys stay forever. Against your will, even.

I take issue with furniture that deliberately moves 1 inch when you’re in a rush to get by.

If you ever ask a teen to do something and they just say “sure” without arguing, check that they haven’t been replaced with an android.

Meds have done more for me than any man ever could.

Why didn’t Scooby Doo smell that the ghosts were human?

Tornadoes are the most relaxing things in the news.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨