Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Plot twist: My laziness is actually a secret superpower that repels negativity! 💁‍♂️✨ Who knew being chill could be so effective at warding off haters? 😂 #LivingMyBestLazyLife"

being, business, hate, here, humor, imagine, irony, just, lazy, me, minding, minding business, over, own, self-awareness

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

People who live in glass houses should install frosted glass around the toilet part.

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2 months ago

around, bathroom, design, frosted, frosted glass, glass, glass house, home, home design, house, humor, live, people, privacy, should, toilet, transparency
Not opening up anymore, have fun trying to figure me out.

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2 months ago

challenge, communication, figure, fun, me, mystery, opening, relationship, trying
Have you ever been in the car with someone who drives like we got extra lives?

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3 months ago

behavior, car, driver, driving, ever, extra, extra life, game, got, humor, life, risky, risky behavior, road, road trip, someone, trip, video, video game
Our neighbor complained that our cat is always running through his garden. My father said: “Okay, I’ll tell her.”

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2 months ago

always, cat, complaint, conversation, father, garden, humor, neighbor, okay, running, tell
What are some good jobs for someone with no passions, interests, motivation, social skills, or strengths?

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2 months ago

career, good, humor, interest, interests, job, jobs, motivation, passion, skill, skills, social, social skill, someone, strength, strengths
Shout-out to the lifeguard who recommended moving the potato to the front of my Speedo.

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2 months ago

beach, embarrassment, front, funny moment, humor, lifeguard, moment, moving, potato, shoutout, Speedo, swimwear

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

63 shares on TikTok this month:

Instead of calling it the John I’m going to start calling my bathroom the Jim. That way I can say I go to the Jim every morning.

72 shares on Threads this month:

Interpretive dance is the best way to answer stupid questions.

27 shares on Snapchat this month:

I’m so vulnerable to nostalgia. The sun will go down and I’ll be like: “Wow… remember when the sun was up… I miss who I was then”

56 shares on Twitch this month:

Blowing kisses to my coworkers so that nobody talks to me today.

75 shares on WeChat this month:

The awkward moment when someone’s zipper is down and you don’t know whether to tell them or not.

29 shares on Discord this month:

When this multivitamin kicks in I’m going to do so much success.

92 shares on Pinterest this month:

Bedrotting is so nice. Just lying in bed, using your phone comfortably.

46 shares on Slack this month:

My hobbies include trying to close the elevator doors before anyone else gets on.

20 shares on Discord this month:

I’ve surpassed the need for coffee, for I have evolved into a higher state of awesome.

50 shares on Discord this month:

One day you’re 18 eating pizza for every lunch, then suddenly you’re 30 and eating salad with celery and kale juice.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇰🇷 has copied:

The first 120 hours after the weekend are always the worst.

Someone from 🇭🇷 has viewed:

“Do you like using Twitter?” Does Sisyphus like his boulder?

Someone from 🇿🇼 has viewed:

Have kids so you can live in a house full of people who can’t find anything.

Someone from 🇲🇦 has downloaded:

Don’t give up on your dreams. If cauliflower can be pizza and zucchini can be noodles, you too can be anything you want.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has viewed:

You have been a very bad boy. Now go to my room!

Someone from 🇸🇰 has downloaded:

If I was a microplastic, I would simply not go in the ocean or anyone’s mouth.

Someone from 🇹🇼 has bookmarked:

People pleasing doesn’t go well with my black attire.

Someone from 🇹🇿 has copied:

The cinema vibe is my favorite, you literally forget about the world for like 2-3 hours.

Someone from 🇨🇷 has copied:

You lose some, you lose some more.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has viewed:

The most expensive clothing you’ll ever wear is a hospital gown.

Social Media Log 💫

Spreading quickly via YouTube:

Everyone says “Do what makes you happy”, until you push them down the stairs.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

Dating apps aren’t working. I’ll see ya at Home Depot, gentlemen.

Making waves on WeChat:

I miss you (the money I spent).

Broadcasted on Pinterest:

If you lift the cat off the couch and it sounds like Velcro, then it didn’t want to leave.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

You don’t scare me, I was married once.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

To be fair, a dumpster is like one of the safest places to have a fire.

Going viral on Facebook:

Dating after 40 is like trying to find the least damaged item at the thrift store that doesn’t smell.

Trending via Facebook:

If you listen to my husband snore, you don’t need Jurassic Park anymore.

Spotted on Twitch:

I don’t need a psychic to tell me which planets make me sad. It’s earth.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Imagine hating me while I’m just over here being lazy and minding my own business.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

People who live in glass houses should install frosted glass around the toilet part.

Not opening up anymore, have fun trying to figure me out.

Have you ever been in the car with someone who drives like we got extra lives?

Our neighbor complained that our cat is always running through his garden. My father said: “Okay, I’ll tell her.”

What are some good jobs for someone with no passions, interests, motivation, social skills, or strengths?

Shout-out to the lifeguard who recommended moving the potato to the front of my Speedo.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨