Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇯🇲 has copied:

Tomorrow isn’t promised, so eat that cake today.

Someone from 🇵🇼 has copied:

I’m so glad I cleaned the house so the kids have a clean canvas to drop their stuff everywhere.

Someone from 🇲🇾 has viewed:

Brainwashing is always considered terrible and horrible. But there are many brains that would benefit from a wash.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has bookmarked:

It sucks when a woman realizes that her knight in shining armor was actually just a moron wrapped in tinfoil.

Someone from 🇲🇺 has copied:

I’ve started eating healthier and exercising if you’re wondering why I’m in such a crappy mood all of a sudden.

Someone from 🇲🇨 has downloaded:

Mr. Beast is like if they made Dubai into a person.

Someone from 🇳🇴 has downloaded:

Love Island is fun, but when is Job Island on?

Someone from 🇪🇸 has copied:

Deleting my mental health to focus on social media.

Someone from 🇮🇩 has bookmarked:

Bro, you’re fine. You just need an impossible sequence of events to play out in perfect order against all odds and you’ll be fine.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has shared:

Spending all my money on lottery tickets so I’ll either be rich or poor, none of this wishy-washy stuff in the middle.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

55 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,324

Funny Quotes Topics

17,443

Funny Quotes Images

15,324

Updated

Jan 2, 2026

Users Online

3,659

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via LinkedIn:

You can mess up big time letting someone know you have a printer.

Live now on Pinterest:

I googled my symptoms, and I just need a day with you in the mountains.

Spotted on Discord:

Jesus turned water into wine. I turn food into fertilizer. We are not the same.

Just shared via Instagram:

There’s no way you could go all the way through the desert on a horse with no name, you’d have named it by the end.

Making waves on Telegram:

Don’t be boring. Create the gossip you would like to hear.

Shared recently on Snapchat:

I might not be able to speak another language but I can speak English slower!

Making waves on Threads:

Sometimes you just need a Saturday to sleep all day and do absolutely nothing.

Shared recently on WeChat:

Women will invite you to shower with them, then cook you alive with a temperature of water you didn’t know existed.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

Cheating before AI required a level of effort that you ended up learning something by default.

Just landed via TikTok:

I can’t believe I forgot to go to the gym today. That’s like 7 years in a row now.

Is it just me, or were we promised a totally different frog-to-prince ratio?

2 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Looks like someone messed up the frog-to-prince conversion chart again! 🐸👑🙃

different, expectation, fairy, fairy tale, frog, humor, just, me, prince, promise, ratio, tale

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

If life has taught me one thing, it’s that I need more money.

0

2 months ago

humor, i, lesson, life, me, money, need, thing
I was 21 when I was 15, that’s why everything’s boring now.

0

3 months ago

15, age, boredom, boring, feeling, feeling old, humor, i, nostalgia, old, time, why, youth
Every room can be a room with a view when I’m in it.

0

2 months ago

every, fun, humor, perspective, room, self-confidence, view, wit
I had to quit my job because people kept falling in love with me there.

0

2 months ago

falling, humor, i, job, love, me, people, quit, relationships, workplace
I’ve had 50 birthdays in a row without being arrested, which I’d say is an impressive streak!

0

2 months ago

50, age, arrest, arrested, being, birthday, celebration, humor, ID, impressive, row, say, streak
Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight.

0

2 months ago

advice, bed, fight, humor, mad, never, relationship, stay, stay up

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

61 shares on TikTok this month:

I don’t drink coffee all the time. I take breaks in between to make another one.

46 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Spotify should have helpful mental health suggestions like “your top listens are Taylor Swift and true crime, go to therapy.”

69 shares on TikTok this month:

If you’re going through hell, keep going.

15 shares on TikTok this month:

Everything is awful, and no one is going to save you from this treacherous world. Oops, I mean, happy Friday!

38 shares on Facebook this month:

I was neglecting my root chakra at the time, your honor.

67 shares on Telegram this month:

My favorite machine at the gym is the one where you put change in, and snacks come out.

67 shares on TikTok this month:

If it ain’t broke, my kids haven’t used it yet.

10 shares on Slack this month:

Sorry for my bad behavior. Mercury is in gatorade or whatever.

14 shares on Threads this month:

Hey dude, I recently became omniscient, and well, you fell off in every universe.

11 shares on Instagram this month:

I’m so good at sleeping that I can do it with my eyes closed.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇦🇱 has copied:

We need a streaming service that’s only ads. No shows, just commercials. They pay us $15 a month.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has bookmarked:

Who’s up thinking about the crushing weight of existence?

Someone from 🇰🇷 has shared:

Bluesky honestly feels like a miracle where you take the most annoying people in the world and stick them in a broken elevator together.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has copied:

If the interviewer doesn’t think it’s cool when you pull a quarter out of his ear, the job wasn’t good enough for you anyways.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has bookmarked:

Just another day of not being hot and rich.

Someone from 🇯🇴 has downloaded:

I can now tell the hour of the day by which part of my body needs a heating pad.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has bookmarked:

The opposite of “taking candy from a baby” is “putting sunscreen on a toddler.”

Someone from 🇶🇦 has copied:

Sorry for the things I said when the internet was down for 10 minutes.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has viewed:

If one door opens when another door closes, your house is probably haunted.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has shared:

No time like now to start “flossing regularly” before tomorrow’s dental appointment.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on WeChat:

The main difference between my dog and my kid is my dog responds to her name being called.

Shared recently on X:

I wish other jobs let us solve issues by releasing diss tracks. Got some sick rhymes about Debbie from accounting and her poorly structured invoicing.

Seen just now on Instagram:

“Angry on the internet” is such an unfortunate personality.

Shared recently on WhatsApp:

Now that the nights are getting cooler again, spiders often hide in your bed in search of warmth. Sleep well!

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

If I’m too much, go find less. I’m not running a clearance sale.

Trending via Messenger:

Everything will kill you so pick something fun.

Broadcasted on WeChat:

Gutted to report that spending a day offline, touching grass with my friends, was phenomenal for my mental health.

Trending via Instagram:

Sorry, I had feelings. I’ll replace them with jokes right away.

Spotted on WhatsApp:

Sorry, can’t go out tonight. My bed told me it needs me, and I can’t let it down.

Just landed via Threads:

Feeling guilty for taking up the entire therapy session talking about myself.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Is it just me, or were we promised a totally different frog-to-prince ratio?

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

If life has taught me one thing, it’s that I need more money.

I was 21 when I was 15, that’s why everything’s boring now.

Every room can be a room with a view when I’m in it.

I had to quit my job because people kept falling in love with me there.

I’ve had 50 birthdays in a row without being arrested, which I’d say is an impressive streak!

Never go to bed mad. Stay up and fight.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨