Trending Funny Quotes 👇

  • I don’t know how to mop my kitchen floor without pretending l’m cleaning up a gruesome crime scene.
  • Don’t you hate it when you offer help and the other person says yes?
  • Why have abs when you can have kebabs?
  • Some people stay longer in a toilet than in a relationship.
  • Much like an Olympic sprinter, I also load up on carbs, exert myself for roughly two minutes, and then quit for the rest of the day.
  • My superpower? I can look you right in the eyes while you’re talking and not hear a single word you said.