Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

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Someone from 🇨🇳 has copied:

I can’t believe we became the adults in the most unaffordable period in history.

Someone from 🇲🇲 has copied:

I am “any text received after 9pm will be answered at 6am” years old.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has copied:

Are you ever so happy to be in bed, you wish you could be even more in bed than you already are?

Someone from 🇯🇴 has shared:

A fun wedding bit is to sit next to a random guest, point to the bride or groom & whisper, “it should’ve been you”

Someone from 🇪🇨 has bookmarked:

My mother told me there is a girl for me in every corner of the earth, but unfortunately the earth is round.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has copied:

It’s so funny how you can meet someone randomly online, and they become such an important part of your life. It’d be nicer if they lived closer, though.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has bookmarked:

Sometimes it’s not a secret, it’s just none of your business.

Someone from 🇦🇪 has bookmarked:

Grok just sounds like something that might try to eat me.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has downloaded:

I am so full of love and anger, like a lava lamp.

Someone from 🇸🇨 has shared:

Keep posting, I’m diagnosing you.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

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Funny Quotes Total

15,753

Funny Quotes Topics

17,766

Funny Quotes Images

15,753

Updated

Feb 3, 2026

Users Online

3,316

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on Threads:

Kinda messed up that the government knows my birthday but never sends me a gift or anything.

Going bananas on Facebook:

Who would have thought that eating a can of beans would backfire like this?

Just landed via Slack:

I may not know what’s going on, but I also have no idea what’s happening.

Going viral on Discord:

Did you know? By replacing your coffee with green tea, you can lose up to 92% of what little joy you still have left in your life.

Going viral on Telegram:

I don’t need coffee, misanthropy fuels me.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

Netflix be like “we know exactly what movie you talkin’ ’bout but we ain’t got it lol”.

Going viral on Instagram:

Work is the worst video game ever.

Just landed via LinkedIn:

I think I can now safely say that none of my co-workers were “personality hires”.

Just landed via Telegram:

Neighbors are fighting. Can I knock on the wall and ask them to speak up so I know whose side I’m on?

Shared recently on Messenger:

Before cell phones, if you were bored in public, you had to flip a nickel in the air over and over.

Leaving my apartment for two weeks, but leaving a single cup in the sink as a gesture to continuity upon my return.

10 hours ago

Funny Quotes

Witty text about leaving a lone cup in the sink as a humorous gesture of continuity.

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Commentary:
Ah, the sacred cup of continuity—may it stand as a noble monument to my eventual return and inevitable procrastination 🍵🏛️😂

absence, apartment, continuity, cup, gesture, humor, leaving, return, routine, single, sink, upon, weeks

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

The name Ella is short for Mozzarella.

5 days ago

comparison, Ella, food, funny comparison, humor, joke, mozzarella, name, short, wordplay
Introducing WifeChat™, the app where you talk to your wife.

2 weeks ago

app, communication, humor, relationship, talk, technology, where, wife, WifeChat
I deserve a percentage of your pay if you ever stole any swag from me.

4 days ago

compensation, deserve, ever, humor, i, me, pay, percentage, stole, swag, theft
This salad tastes like I’d rather be fat.

2 days ago

dieting, fat, food, humor, ID, salad, sarcasm, taste, weight
Can’t. Just put my hair in a bun and that’s just about enough exercise for today.

2 weeks ago

bun, day, enough, exercise, hair, humor, just, lazy, lazy day, put, self-care, today, workout
We all just kind of accept it as normal that we have a meat tentacle living inside of our mouth.

2 weeks ago

absurdity, acceptance, humor, inside, just, living, meat, mouth, normal, tentacle

Funny Quotes Collections

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Social Media Stars ⭐

52 shares on Telegram this month:

Don’t forget to be mean to strangers on the internet today, for no reason whatsoever.

90 shares on YouTube this month:

I’m not an idiot anymore, universe, please stop with the lessons.

30 shares on TikTok this month:

Being an adult is like folding a fitted sheet.

21 shares on Messenger this month:

I need to social distance with the refrigerator so I can flatten my curve.

55 shares on Pinterest this month:

The greatest research skill you can have is being a nosy bitch who wants to find out.

83 shares on Messenger this month:

The problem with meal prep is you have to eat the meal that you prepped.

25 shares on X this month:

Really wanted to be a therapist until I read some of your guys’ posts and problems, and I want nothing to do with that mess.

71 shares on Messenger this month:

Hey, wanna intertwine delusions and make them a reality or nah?

46 shares on YouTube this month:

The urge to pee in the morning is so aggressive. Bro, like, chill we’re getting there. Don’t threaten to come out.

71 shares on Reddit this month:

When someone says they’re never going to talk to me again, I do the right thing and say thank you.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇴 has shared:

The second half of your life begins when you stop wanting to get even and start wanting to get odd.

Someone from 🇸🇳 has copied:

Yeah, I work at the fart bar. Yup. I’m a fartender. Farts on me tonight!

Someone from 🇸🇱 has shared:

Why can’t I cry money instead of tears?

Someone from 🇪🇹 has bookmarked:

“Pre” means before, and “post” means after. Using both at the same time would be preposterous.

Someone from 🇬🇪 has viewed:

My dad once sneezed so hard that he set every clock back two hours.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has bookmarked:

You can make a salad without lettuce if you want, there are no rules.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has shared:

Welcome to your 50s, your joints are now meteorologists.

Someone from 🇻🇪 has viewed:

Nostalgia is mostly dumb nonsense, but movie rental stores were legitimately better than streaming.

Someone from 🇧🇹 has shared:

All these galaxies and planets, and we ended up on the one with 40 hour work weeks.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has viewed:

Me, whenever I can easily do some yoga pose, “This can’t be right.”

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via YouTube:

Building a snowman so I can punch it in the face.

Shared recently on Threads:

If you want to make God laugh, inhale some helium then tell Him your plans.

Just landed via Snapchat:

I’m having people over to stare at their phones later, if you want to come by.

Going viral on Threads:

No matter how old you are, when the kitchen roll is empty, you have a telescope.

Making waves on Reddit:

Mouse in a conference call: hold on, I’m gonna put you on squeakerphone.

Making waves on Snapchat:

My longest relationship has been with my Hotmail account.

Making waves on Reddit:

I think probably the reason some people look better at 30 than at 20 is because they’re wealthier.

Live now on Messenger:

Dating again after you break up with a long-term partner is like dying in a video game and ending up back at the start to do it all again, except with less health.

Going bananas on Twitch:

I lied, I’m jealous. I hope every girl who looks at you gets clipped by a meteor.

Seen just now on Discord:

11 out of 10 women are always right.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Leaving my apartment for two weeks, but leaving a single cup in the sink as a gesture to continuity upon my return.

Keep the laugh going 😂

The name Ella is short for Mozzarella.

Introducing WifeChat™, the app where you talk to your wife.

I deserve a percentage of your pay if you ever stole any swag from me.

This salad tastes like I’d rather be fat.

Can’t. Just put my hair in a bun and that’s just about enough exercise for today.

We all just kind of accept it as normal that we have a meat tentacle living inside of our mouth.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨