Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
🧅💧🔪 "In a parallel universe, onions shed tears as they slice through humans… Now that's a tear-jerking twist! Who knew veggies could have such strong feelings? 🤯😂"

alternate, chop, cry, human, humans, humor, know, onion, onions, universe, where

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Funny Quotes Collections

✨ New Funny Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

55 shares on Pinterest this month:

A person that weights 200 pounds on Earth weighs 76 pounds on Mars. So I’m not overweight, I’m on the wrong planet.

35 shares on Facebook this month:

Y’all ever postpone an outfit? Like, nah, let me save this for a better day? Same.

10 shares on Discord this month:

Look away from your laptop for 1 second, and MS Teams will say you left the country.

50 shares on Threads this month:

Wild that we could have been foraging for berries and dying off at 33, but we chose this nonsense instead.

64 shares on WeChat this month:

I read classics because my FOMO is making me want to understand every reference ever.

95 shares on Instagram this month:

White Lotus is a cautionary tale about taking time off from work.

87 shares on Discord this month:

I’ve never really had a beach body, but my snowman body is coming along quite nicely.

38 shares on TikTok this month:

“How would you describe yourself.” Me: I absolutely would not.

63 shares on Messenger this month:

Just eating the emotional support snickers bar in my purse. How about you?

13 shares on WeChat this month:

It’s beginning to cost a lot like Christmas.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇳🇿 has copied:

My security system is just a bunch of my unpaid bills taped to my front door.

Someone from 🇬🇧 has viewed:

Marriage is just asking each other, “What do you want to do for dinner?” and then replying, “No, not that,” until death do us part.

Someone from 🇧🇸 has shared:

Type of hangover that makes you understand why normies spend $25 for a poor soul to bike a bagel to them.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has copied:

Spring is what we call the time in between complaining about the cold and complaining about the heat.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has bookmarked:

Thank you for being friends with me. Baffling decision, but thank you.

Someone from 🇲🇻 has bookmarked:

You honestly gotta believe in yourself so much that it’s borderline delusional.

Someone from 🇩🇴 has bookmarked:

Me, when someone’s obsessed with me: Yikes! Me, when someone’s not obsessed with me: WTF?

Someone from 🇺🇾 has copied:

Dear recipe websites. I don’t need your life story. Just give me the recipe.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has copied:

I have never in my life learned from another person’s mistakes, I would literally let a giant wooden horse into my house right this second.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has copied:

I’ve done the math: If the month had 10 days, I would get by with my money.

Social Media Log 💫

Freshly posted on WhatsApp:

I, unfortunately, was born without any interest in Avatar.

Spotted on YouTube:

Texting him “Happy New Year” to interrupt his healing process.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

Whoever said “team work makes the dream work” needs to explain that to my many personalities.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

Decorated the house across the street so I can look out the window and enjoy my handiwork.

Trending via Snapchat:

The way turkeys feel about November is probably how treadmills feel about January.

Freshly posted on Instagram:

There’s two sides to every story, and then there’s these screenshots I got.

Just landed via Telegram:

I just sneezed into my elbow and now I’m waiting for a preschool teacher to praise me.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

I came, I saw, I took a selfie as proof that I came and saw.

Shared recently on Pinterest:

I listen to a lot of white noise, so I get really excited when it rains or someone turns on a fan. It’s like seeing my favorite band live.

Freshly posted on YouTube:

If you wave your keys in front of a giant house, people will think you own it.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Maybe there’s an alternate universe where onions cry when they chop up humans, you don’t know.

Most earthquakes could have been an email.

The pointless tidy-up before a play date.

Did you know? By replacing your coffee with green tea, you can lose up to 92% of what little joy you still have left in your life.

“Do not touch” must be one of the scariest things to read in braille.

I had a million opportunities to waste money this year, and I took them all. In fact, even when there wasn’t an opportunity, I created one.

As president, I will allow people to use the same password as before when changing their password.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Maybe there’s an alternate universe where onions cry when they chop up humans, you don’t know.

Keep the laugh going 😂

Most earthquakes could have been an email.

The pointless tidy-up before a play date.

Did you know? By replacing your coffee with green tea, you can lose up to 92% of what little joy you still have left in your life.

“Do not touch” must be one of the scariest things to read in braille.

I had a million opportunities to waste money this year, and I took them all. In fact, even when there wasn’t an opportunity, I created one.

As president, I will allow people to use the same password as before when changing their password.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨