Mercury retrograde: because adulting is hard, and sometimes you just need a celestial excuse. Posted onJan 18, 2026 by slickboy in Funny Quotes 💾 Save Image Commentary:When the stars are like, "It's not procrastination, it's cosmic alignment!" ✨🔮🙃 Related funny posts 😂 Did you ever stop to ask how Mercury feels about being in retrograde? No, because you only think about yourself. I used to blame all my problems on my parents, but now that I’m a grown up, I have come to terms with the fact that when bad things happen to me, it’s probably just that Mercury’s in retrograde again. My bank account is also in retrograde. There will never be a perfect time. Make that mistake now. I was waiting on the universe but the universe was actually waiting on me.