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One of the biggest struggles of being an adult is deciding what to make for supper. Every. Single. Night.

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The sun is so successful because it has the perfect bedtime and morning routines.

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If this meeting were any slower, itโ€™d be a landscape painting.

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Did you ever buy a pack of underwear, take them out, and think, wow, these are huge… then try them on, and they fit perfectly?

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My girlfriend confided in me she loves when I blow air on her when she’s hot, but honestly, Iโ€™m not a fan.

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I wish pets lived longer, and life wasn’t so expensive, and cake didn’t make you fat, and people weren’t twats.

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I hate it when someone asks me what I did yesterday. I don’t know. Breathed a lot, probably got mad at something … sighed heavily. The list goes on.

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Welcome to your fifties. Saturday Night Fever now means lots of rest, cold medicine, and chicken noodle soup.

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Do you think working at Pizza Hut would help you get a job at Sunglass Hut? You know, with all that hut experience?

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Later is the best time to do anything.

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My ideal vacation would be to drop my family off at the airport and then have a week of peace and quiet.

My ideal vacation would be to drop my family off at the airport and then have a week of peace and quiet.

Commentary:
"Sounds like the ultimate dream vacation! ๐ŸŒดโœˆ๏ธ Who needs sandy beaches when you can have peace and quiet all to yourself? Just don't forget to pick the family back up on your way home! ๐Ÿ˜œ๐Ÿ‘‹ #QuietTimeIsGolden"



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