Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Mirror, mirror on the wall, who's the selfie queen of them all? 🤳💁‍♀️ If only mirrors had a screenshot button, we could capture every flawless moment! #MirrorGoals"

button, humor, mirror, needs, reflection, screenshot, self-image, technology, vanity

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

If you ever get a chance to date a cute person for one day, where will you take me?

0

2 months ago

activity, chance, cute, cute person, date, day, ever, fun, fun activity, me, person, take, where
I’m not saying I need glasses. But today I watched a bunny in a meadow until it flew away.

0

2 months ago

away, bunny, flew, glasses, humor, i, meadow, need, observation, saying, today, vision
I laugh at my own jokes because I am my target audience. Y’all just happen to be there.

0

2 months ago

am, audience, comedy, confidence, happen, humor, i, joke, jokes, just, laugh, laughter, own, self-deprecating, self-love, Target
Girl cats get named after ancient goddesses and boy cats get named after Taco Bell menu items.

0

2 months ago

after, ancient, bell, boy, cat, cats, girl, goddess, humor, items, menu, names, pets, stereotypes, taco, Taco Bell
I like to people-watch, but I’m an advanced people-watcher. When I spot another people-watcher, I like to watch them watching other people.

0

2 months ago

activity, advanced, another, humor, i, observation, people, people-watch, spot, watch, watcher, watching
I’m already cold. I know me and my low iron ain’t gonna survive winter.

0

2 months ago

cold, health, humor, i, iron, know, low, low iron, me, survival, survive, winter

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

79 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Girls ask for help to open a jar, but can throw a couch during an argument.

65 shares on Pinterest this month:

I don’t have a favorite vampire. If you ask me, they all suck.

87 shares on Reddit this month:

Why is smoking the only addiction jobs give you breaks to do? I should get 15 minutes every hour to cook up some parlays.

84 shares on Threads this month:

It’s a fabulous time to be alive if you love: verification codes, verifying your email, yelling ‘REAL PERSON’ into a phone at a robot, reading nightmarish news all day, every day, hot.

87 shares on Messenger this month:

If you play guitar in a band, always make sure to look like it hurts to play.

47 shares on Messenger this month:

I could never give up my dog, he knows too much.

36 shares on X this month:

A good audiobook will have you inventing chores to do.

73 shares on Discord this month:

Currently helping my husband look for his $20 I spent yesterday.

90 shares on TikTok this month:

The end of Twitter is taking forever. Did Tolkien write this?

72 shares on Instagram this month:

Sorry I can’t help you move, my hands are in permanent air quotes.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇱 has bookmarked:

Being complimented by a girl in public is like getting kissed by an angel.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has bookmarked:

Pro tip: Avoid the news for a couple of days and have some fun.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has bookmarked:

I think it’s time I find myself a new inspiration, asking myself “what would Batman do?” gets me in too much trouble.

Someone from 🇸🇻 has bookmarked:

Girls be like, “I know a spot,” then sacrifice you under the full moon.

Someone from 🇱🇦 has downloaded:

Blocking someone isn’t enough, I want them to get lice.

Someone from 🇦🇸 has bookmarked:

I try to shoot all of my garbage into outer space, but usually it just lands in my neighbor’s backyard.

Someone from 🇵🇹 has shared:

God knew I’d be too powerful if He made me not annoying to women.

Someone from 🇧🇭 has downloaded:

Well, that’s not very in love with me of you.

Someone from 🇲🇱 has copied:

What if we kissed while watching the decay of our society?

Someone from 🇨🇦 has bookmarked:

I don’t like the person I become when I’m alone in the break room with a box of donuts.

Social Media Log 💫

Just shared via YouTube:

Today, I want to talk about how people’s houses smell funny, but mine doesn’t.

Going viral on LinkedIn:

Cowboy outfits should be called ranch dressing.

Making waves on WhatsApp:

I have heard that people without dogs have to pick up dropped food themselves.

Spreading quickly via Discord:

I remember the first time I saw a universal remote control. I thought to myself, “Wow, this changes everything.”

Going viral on Slack:

May life treat you exactly the same way you treat servers, store clerks, senior citizens, children, and animals.

Just shared via LinkedIn:

Nobody calls you old more than people 2 years younger than you.

Just landed via Messenger:

I woke up alive again.

Just landed via WhatsApp:

My dog pisses on every election sign regardless of political party so I have no idea who he is voting for.

Making waves on Instagram:

Your honor, when I said I wanted to be held, I didn’t mean in contempt.

Freshly posted on Pinterest:

Way too many low IQ conspiracy theories floating around. Give me high IQ conspiracy theories.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

My mirror needs a screenshot button.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

If you ever get a chance to date a cute person for one day, where will you take me?

I’m not saying I need glasses. But today I watched a bunny in a meadow until it flew away.

I laugh at my own jokes because I am my target audience. Y’all just happen to be there.

Girl cats get named after ancient goddesses and boy cats get named after Taco Bell menu items.

I like to people-watch, but I’m an advanced people-watcher. When I spot another people-watcher, I like to watch them watching other people.

I’m already cold. I know me and my low iron ain’t gonna survive winter.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨