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Commentary:
"Ah, the joys of aging! All-nighters now come with this unique bathroom bonus 🚽😅 Who knew reaching middle age would bring such 'exciting' milestones? Stay hydrated, folks! 💦🌙 #Adulting"

adulthood, all nighter, humor, i, means, night, pee, sleep

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

The best weight you’ll ever lose is the weight of other people’s opinions.

0

4 weeks ago

best, confidence, ever, humor, lose, loss, motivation, opinion, opinions, self, self-confidence, weight, weight loss, wisdom
Once married, the woman takes over the entire closet and the man stores everything he owns in his left cargo pocket.

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2 months ago

cargo, cargo pocket, closet, everything, humor, left, man, marriage, married, once, over, pocket, relationship, stereotypes, storage, stores, woman
The name Ella is short for Mozzarella.

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2 months ago

comparison, Ella, food, funny comparison, humor, joke, mozzarella, name, short, wordplay
I’m in a comfy dress today, but I look like a potato in floral. Call me Nelly Flortato.

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2 months ago

call, comfy, dress, fashion, floral, flortato, humor, i, me, nelly, Nelly Flortato, potato, self-deprecation, today
A drone, but for seeing which fast food drive-thrus have the shortest line.

0

2 months ago

convenience, drive-thru, drone, fast, fast food, food, humor, line, seeing, technology
People tell me to just be myself like that would be a good thing.

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2 months ago

advice, be myself, good, good thing, growth, humor, just, me, myself, people, personal, personal growth, sarcasm, self-identity, tell, thing

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

60 shares on Pinterest this month:

I find it extremely hard to believe that you’re rolling on the floor laughing.

10 shares on X this month:

I’m addicted to following the rules I made up. And also breaking the rules I made up.

32 shares on WhatsApp this month:

Nothing is hungrier than a Roomba that sees a charger cord.

37 shares on Slack this month:

Dear sleep, I’m sorry we broke up this morning. I want you back!

56 shares on Discord this month:

Remember before social media you would have to pick up the phone and call someone to tell them how much you love bacon?

80 shares on Snapchat this month:

I told the trees what you did. Be wary when you enter the forest next.

50 shares on TikTok this month:

I’ve woken up yet again without an emotional support capybara.

40 shares on Snapchat this month:

“Devil’s advocate” implies the existence of heaven’s prosecutor.

68 shares on Telegram this month:

Some people avoid bacon for the sake of religion. I avoid religion for the sake of bacon.

94 shares on Snapchat this month:

I finally have glasses, which is great because I needed one more thing to frantically search for every morning.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇮🇶 has bookmarked:

You know what’s worse than someone’s phone alarm playing the tune over and over? Someone else who starts whistling along.

Someone from 🇸🇩 has downloaded:

I don’t like violence, but I don’t mind if I get hit by luck.

Someone from 🇵🇾 has shared:

Hosting Thanksgiving? Bring up politics so everyone will leave early.

Someone from 🇬🇷 has downloaded:

Am I the only one who wonders why the Flintstones celebrate Christmas?

Someone from 🇳🇿 has bookmarked:

You are allowed to be crazy as long as you are equally as hot.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has shared:

Called in, “Let’s make this simple. What excuse haven’t I used yet?”

Someone from 🇱🇰 has bookmarked:

Perfume and jewelry are two things you can never go wrong with gifting me.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has copied:

I’m cosplaying as a functional adult again.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has copied:

Now I get why my grandma got up early to have a little coffee by herself.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has bookmarked:

People will love you. People will hate you. And none of it will have anything to do with you.

Social Media Log 💫

Going bananas on Instagram:

Doomscrolling: because who doesn’t love anxiety as a hobby?

Shared recently on Instagram:

I briefly stepped away from social media to get an idea of what else is going on in the world. For instance, I didn’t realize I was still married.

Breaking via Threads:

Nightmares are so embarrassing. Why is my anxiety working the night shift?

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

My kids are smart but sometimes they say dumb stuff like, “Mom, why do you always buy Snickers when you’re the only one who likes them?”

Going viral on Reddit:

Now that Christmas and New Year are out of the way, we can focus on the things that really matter: My posts.

Spotted on LinkedIn:

I don’t know why we traded horses for cars. Your car won’t stop in front of a river and be like, “no way dumbass, we aren’t going to make that.”

Freshly posted on TikTok:

I’m sorry, I didn’t realize how quiet your bathroom exhaust fan was.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

I love when people say “be yourself,” like I haven’t already been doing that and scaring everyone off.

Going bananas on WeChat:

Some nights I stay up hella late just farting.

Just shared via Messenger:

Stupidity begins where irony is no longer understood.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Nowadays an “all-nighter” means I didn’t have to get up to pee.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

The best weight you’ll ever lose is the weight of other people’s opinions.

Once married, the woman takes over the entire closet and the man stores everything he owns in his left cargo pocket.

The name Ella is short for Mozzarella.

I’m in a comfy dress today, but I look like a potato in floral. Call me Nelly Flortato.

A drone, but for seeing which fast food drive-thrus have the shortest line.

People tell me to just be myself like that would be a good thing.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨