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10,000+ funny quotes

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Someone from 🇬🇼 has copied:

It’s so embarrassing when you make a silly face at a baby, and they do not care at all.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has viewed:

The closest thing I’ve had to a personal trainer is the ice cream truck that drove past my house.

Someone from 🇨🇩 has viewed:

Technology has really helped me waste my time efficiently.

Someone from 🇨🇲 has shared:

Toddlers: the brutally honest roommates nobody asked for!

Someone from 🇦🇿 has viewed:

One of the hardest things to do as an adult is to go back to work after a long weekend.

Someone from 🇲🇪 has bookmarked:

Someone asked me if I had any hobbies and I panicked and said “lasagna”.

Someone from 🇧🇾 has copied:

My love language is caffeine and being left alone until I’m kind again.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

330 this month

Funny Quotes Total

14,923

Funny Quotes Topics

17,095

Funny Quotes Images

14,923

Updated

Dec 12, 2025

Users Online

3,842

Social Media Log 💫

Shared recently on Discord:

I love when lashes make me look evil.

Seen just now on WeChat:

Why are moths always out at night when they like light so much? Wait til y’all find out about the sun.

Just shared via Slack:

New COVID variant tries to sell you an extended auto warranty.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

Aliens: We are here to take over. Me: Thank God.

Just landed via Twitch:

Grab your own butt! Love yourself!

Just shared via WhatsApp:

You never realize how many curse words are in a song till you play it for your family.

Making waves on Twitch:

The day they handed out patience, I left because it was taking too long.

Quitting my job to focus on staying inside.

1 month ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
"Finally putting my degree in Couch-ology to good use! 🛋️📚😎"

focus, home, humor, inside, introvert, job, quarantine, quitting, staying, staying inside, work, work from home

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Source? Divine intuition, gut instinct, and cryptic symbolism from my dreams.

5 days ago
cryptic, divine, dream, dreams, gut, gut instinct, instinct, intuition, source, symbolism
I will charge a 25% tariff on my steely gaze.

1 month ago
25, charge, gaze, humor, i, sarcasm, steel, tariff, wit
Flex on strangers by asking them if they remember you.

1 month ago
asking, awkward, awkward moment, confidence, flex, humor, interaction, moment, remember, social, social interaction, strangers
August is almost over. September is next week. Time to pick out a Halloween costume and start your Christmas shopping. Happy New Year, everybody.

3 months ago
almost, August, Christmas, Christmas shopping, costume, Halloween, Halloween costume, happy, holiday, holiday planning, humor, management, new, new year, next, over, pick, planning, seasonal, seasonal humor, September, shopping, start, time, time management, week, year
I can’t work under these festive conditions.

1 month ago
conditions, distractions, festive, humor, i, productivity, under, work
Before you have kids, ask yourself: how patient am I with really stupid people?

1 month ago
am, ask, before, humor, i, kids, parenting, patience, patient, people, self-reflection, stupid, yourself

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Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

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Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇭🇳 has viewed:

Of course the laundry has to be done, but the wine doesn’t drink itself either.

Someone from 🇩🇰 has shared:

I’m not climbing a hill if I’m dying. That sounds terrible. I’ll die on this chair. Drinking orange Fanta.

Someone from 🇸🇱 has copied:

We need a better word for horny that sounds elegant and gorgeous.

Someone from 🇬🇦 has shared:

I need a job where I don’t actually have to work.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has shared:

I’m no expert, but I don’t think the United Kingdom is very united.

Someone from 🇲🇬 has viewed:

My husband accidentally locked himself out of the house, and I didn’t hear him knocking until I finished eating the rest of his cheesecake. So weird.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has shared:

It’s weird how the UFO’s always seem to crash in places that only the government and military have access to.

Social Media Log 💫

Going bananas on YouTube:

I’m not sure my body can handle much more of this “getting out of bed” nonsense.

Breaking via Instagram:

I don’t hide from my problems, I just ignore them until they lose interest.

Just shared via Discord:

Having a low-quality camera will definitely force you to keep your life private.

Live now on YouTube:

After all the books are banned, they’ll move on to suggestive fruit.

Freshly posted on Reddit:

Maybe the reason we weren’t that affected by all the violence we saw in cartoons as kids is because it was offset by classical music.

Making waves on Facebook:

69 but we both just farting.

Going viral on Twitch:

Whoever said “team work makes the dream work” needs to explain that to my many personalities.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Quitting my job to focus on staying inside.

Source? Divine intuition, gut instinct, and cryptic symbolism from my dreams.

I will charge a 25% tariff on my steely gaze.

August is almost over. September is next week. Time to pick out a Halloween costume and start your Christmas shopping. Happy New Year, everybody.

I can’t work under these festive conditions.

Before you have kids, ask yourself: how patient am I with really stupid people?

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Before I started my own business, I would suffer from anxiety on Sunday nights. But now that I run my own business, I have anxiety every night.

Stop using ChatGPT. You got a question, you come to me first.

Got a scam email full of mistakes like they’re not even trying. It won’t be long before AI takes their jobs.

Saying “Who is it?” when the doctor knocks on the exam room door.

Ratatouille is hilarious because the villain wasn’t even evil; he just didn’t want food cooked by rats?!?

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

I’m at the age where an uncomfortable bed will have me injured for a couple of days.

You know when you tap a video to see how long it’s got left? I wish you could do that to people while they’re talking.

This year has been the perfect blend of me losing my mind and having the time of my life.

I made a smoothie that needs a spoon.

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

There’s nothing better than knowing that you don’t have to set an alarm clock for the next day.

I’m not afraid of ghosts because everyone who’s mad at me is still alive.

Nobody told me that when you get a husband the ears are sold separately.

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

I bet aliens lock their door when they go past earth.

It’s so cold that men who wear shorts outside in the winter are wearing TWO pairs of shorts.

Bartenders be like “here’s that receipt, I’ll go ahead and put it on the wettest part of the bar”.

I need a six-month vacation twice a year.

Randomly hearing your favorite song is more satisfying than putting it on yourself.

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Quitting my job to focus on staying inside.

Related Funny Posts 🤝

Source? Divine intuition, gut instinct, and cryptic symbolism from my dreams.

I will charge a 25% tariff on my steely gaze.

Flex on strangers by asking them if they remember you.

August is almost over. September is next week. Time to pick out a Halloween costume and start your Christmas shopping. Happy New Year, everybody.

I can’t work under these festive conditions.

Before you have kids, ask yourself: how patient am I with really stupid people?

Trending Funny Quotes 📈

Hot Funny Quotes 🔥

Trending Topics 📁

Funny Quotes of the Month 🚀

Funny Quotes of the Year ⭐

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