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Commentary:
"Rain: nature's ultimate party crasher 🌧️☔ Some scramble for cover, while others do a happy rain dance! 💃😄 Who knew water falling from the sky could be so polarizing? 🤷‍♂️🤣"

activity, cancellation, delight, humor, others, plans, rain, upset, upsetting, weather

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Self-help books are brain rot. Return to fiction.

0

3 weeks ago

book, book recommendation, books, brain, brain rot, fiction, humor, reading, recommendation, return, rot, self-help, self-help book
Every time I see an odd screw on the floor somewhere, I think one of my loose ones has finally come out.

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2 months ago

DIY, every, floor, humor, i, loose, maintenance, odd, screw, think, thoughts, time
No, I’m not “dating anyone.” I’m really busy playing outside.

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2 months ago

activity, anyone, busy, dating, denial, free, free time, fun, fun activity, humor, lying, outdoor, outdoor activity, outside, playing, time
Whoever’s been in charge of the weather for the last few weeks seems to have fallen asleep on the couch with the remote control in their hand.

0

2 months ago

asleep, charge, control, couch, funny observation, hand, humor, last, observation, remote, remote control, responsibility, sleep, weather, weeks
Cocaine is God’s way of telling you that you make too much money.

0

4 weeks ago

addiction, cocaine, drug, gods, humor, money, much, telling, too, wealth
What genius called it road rage and not locomotive?

0

2 months ago

genius, humor, irony, locomotive, rage, road, transportation

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

Social Media Stars ⭐

28 shares on Messenger this month:

Don’t you hate it when you offer help and the other person says yes?

83 shares on Snapchat this month:

The tragedy of my life is that I theoretically know when I shouldn’t say anything. And then I hear myself talking.

71 shares on LinkedIn this month:

I have tasted employment, I have tasted joblessness and I recommend generational wealth guys.

26 shares on WeChat this month:

My mind not only wanders, sometimes it leaves completely!

99 shares on TikTok this month:

I just want what every middle-aged person wants: to remember what it was that I wanted.

14 shares on Telegram this month:

We need a streaming service that’s only ads. No shows, just commercials. They pay us $15 a month.

21 shares on Discord this month:

If you want people to have kind words when you pass, you should say kind words when you’re alive.

68 shares on Messenger this month:

The era where you dropped your phone and your battery flew out was just crazy.

16 shares on Messenger this month:

White Lotus is a cautionary tale about taking time off from work.

20 shares on Facebook this month:

I wish my life could have a stats screen but for things I care about. Like how many English Muffins with peanut butter I’ve eaten.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇲 has copied:

I’ve literally never copied and pasted text and thought, “I’m so glad it kept the formatting and font from the other document.”

Someone from 🇳🇵 has downloaded:

That “never again” talk with yourself after a certain experience is always funny.

Someone from 🇺🇾 has shared:

Big city friend is complaining about a 10 minute wait for a subway while I sit here waiting for the rail replacement horse.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has viewed:

A big part of my job as a parent is moving things away from the edges of countertops.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has bookmarked:

I think my type is a nice person.

Someone from 🇦🇹 has downloaded:

Clearly, hell is empty, the demons are all here.

Someone from 🇬🇲 has copied:

Someone called me strict today, and that means a lot to me because I’m a recovering people pleaser.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has bookmarked:

I don’t assume anything except the fetal position.

Someone from 🇸🇿 has copied:

Did you know on the Canary Islands there is not one canary? And on the Virgin Isles? Same thing – not one canary there either!

Someone from 🇬🇼 has bookmarked:

People make the mistake of keeping aubergines in the fridge, when in fact they should be kept in the bin.

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on TikTok:

I’m not good at solving Pi, but I’m really good at eating it.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

Love crawling into bed like it’s a spa retreat, only to wake up like I survived a bar fight.

Live now on WeChat:

When life gives you lemons, take the lemons. They were a gift. Maybe life thought you liked lemons. Did you think about that? No, you’re always thinking about yourself.

Freshly posted on Telegram:

Shall I cook, clean, or do the grocery shopping? Okay, reading it is.

Just shared via Pinterest:

I just ate, and now I’m going swimming, so I guess this is goodbye.

Making waves on Threads:

Someone just honked to get me out of my parking spot faster… so now I have to sit here until both of us are dead.

Seen just now on Reddit:

You can make a salad without lettuce if you want, there are no rules.

Freshly posted on Messenger:

My life started becoming a mess when I was put in charge of my own bedtime.

Just landed via Telegram:

Whoever came up with the name “dentures” really missed the opportunity to call them “substitooths”.

Seen just now on Facebook:

11 out of 10 women are always right.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Rain cancels plans, upsetting some and delighting others.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Self-help books are brain rot. Return to fiction.

Every time I see an odd screw on the floor somewhere, I think one of my loose ones has finally come out.

No, I’m not “dating anyone.” I’m really busy playing outside.

Whoever’s been in charge of the weather for the last few weeks seems to have fallen asleep on the couch with the remote control in their hand.

Cocaine is God’s way of telling you that you make too much money.

What genius called it road rage and not locomotive?

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨