Regrettably, my children appear to have befriended a child I find annoying.

Someone from 🇳🇱 has bookmarked:

One or the other, Lord – I can’t be broke and heartbroken.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has shared:

If you like true crime stories, I highly recommend the history of the Catholic Church.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has bookmarked:

Sorry, boss, I can’t come in to work today, I’m gonna be playing outside.

Someone from 🇬🇾 has downloaded:

We need a word for that weird feeling you get when you learn what a podcaster looks like.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has bookmarked:

Tried to sleep by reading a boring book and now it’s suddenly the most interesting book.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has viewed:

The man who invented autocorrect has died. Restaurant in peace.

Someone from 🇰🇪 has downloaded:

Somebody needs to get my shit together.

Someone from 🇰🇮 has bookmarked:

I overthink, therefore I am.

Someone from 🇷🇸 has downloaded:

I’m not lazy. I just give my couch the love it deserves.

Someone from 🇸🇰 has bookmarked:

“I’d rather hurl myself into an active volcano!” -me, politely declining dates.