Relationship status: I’m the only one wearing my hoodies.

Someone from 🇵🇪 has copied:

I never thought I would say this, and it took me a while to come to terms, but I think I ate too much bacon.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has bookmarked:

Quickie so fast, it’s called secs.

Someone from 🇰🇼 has bookmarked:

The adult version of “head, shoulders, knees and toes” is “wallet, glasses, keys and phone.”

Someone from 🇿🇦 has shared:

At this point making life choices involves liquor and a dart board.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has downloaded:

Fun fact: Malcolm X was not his birth name. He was originally Malcolm Twitter.

Someone from 🇱🇨 has shared:

I love surprising my girl, today she woke up single.

Someone from 🇳🇵 has downloaded:

People aren’t so bad if you stay indoors and don’t talk to them.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has shared:

We need a true crime show called Downtown Stabby.

Someone from 🇩🇲 has downloaded:

I’m really good at compromising as long as I get my way.

Someone from 🇮🇷 has copied:

Don’t be sad, laundry, nobody’s doing me either.