Someone from 🇹🇬 has downloaded:

How can you not appreciate a drunk text? Someone is absolutely off their face and still thinking of you.

Someone from 🇲🇼 has bookmarked:

Her: how are you still single? Me: it’s easier than you think.

Someone from 🇸🇴 has bookmarked:

I had big plans to sleep in today, but my bladder canceled.

Someone from 🇩🇪 has copied:

There are two types of people in the world, those who have to go to Walmart, and those who get to go to Walmart.

Someone from 🇪🇬 has shared:

Who called it asking the waiter about the specials and not retrieving data from the server?

Someone from 🇧🇧 has bookmarked:

Unfortunately, you have to almost worship the ground I walk on for me to believe you’re into me.

Someone from 🇨🇳 has copied:

I now have Taylor Swift as my alarm. Now I always wake up five minutes earlier so I don’t have to listen to it.

Someone from 🇨🇦 has downloaded:

I used to work at McDonald’s and we only told ugly people that the ice cream machine was broken. So I have bad news if you were ever denied ice cream.

Someone from 🇧🇧 has copied:

Lord, please take this gas out of my stomach and put it in my car.

Someone from 🇦🇫 has copied:

Babe, are you okay? You’ve barely touched your unread books.