Wordgag ツ

Commentary:
"Ah, a great reminder that a little controversy never hurt anyone! 🤷‍♂️ Keep stirring that pot and watch the haters roll in – it means you're doing something right! 😏💁‍♀️"

effort, enough, hard, hate, honesty, humor, motivation, nobody, perspective, remember, self-improvement, trying

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

My favorite thing to do is nothing.

0

2 months ago

favorite, favorite thing, humor, leisure, nothing, procrastination, relaxation, thing
If you listen closely, you can hear me not caring.

0

2 months ago

apathy, care, humor, indifference, listening, me, sarcasm, wit
People keep wishing January was over like the worst month of the year isn’t coming up next. Thats like wishing someone would stop arguing with you and just punch you in the face.

0

2 months ago

arguing, argument, coming, face, humor, January, just, keep, month, next, over, people, punch, sarcasm, someone, stop, wishing, worst, year
Halloween is a big day for dogs who love to absolutely lose their shit when the doorbell rings.

0

2 months ago

big, celebration, day, dogs, doorbell, excitement, Halloween, lose, love, pets, reaction, rings, shit
Babe, are you okay? You’ve barely responded to my telepathic messages.

0

4 months ago

babe, communication, concern, humor, message, messages, okay, partner, relationship, telepathic, telepathic message, texting
All I care about is being financially stable and getting sexier.

0

1 month ago

attractiveness, being, care, financial, financial stability, getting, humor, i, priorities, self-improvement, sexier, stability, stable

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

24 shares on X this month:

The gap in my resume? Yeah, it’s called playing outside.

57 shares on Pinterest this month:

HR is giving me a hard time because I’ve been starting all my work emails with “Dearly Beloved”.

51 shares on Slack this month:

Sunday without HBO feels like a meal without carbs — empty and deeply wrong.

73 shares on Threads this month:

Show me in the employee handbook where it says I can’t make weird noises in my cubicle.

11 shares on Messenger this month:

The Bloodhound Gang were very special because its music for 12-year-old boys, but every reference requires you to be 40 years old.

72 shares on X this month:

Embattled politicians resign saying they want to spend more time with their families. Do their families get a say in this?

37 shares on Threads this month:

I hate it when I’m outside, and an insect lands and crawls on my glasses, and for a split second, I think aliens have invaded.

89 shares on Telegram this month:

If we hadn’t made them extinct, instead of Kung Fu Panda we could have had Tae Kwon Dodo.

34 shares on Instagram this month:

Hate it when I pull out a winter coat and there’s no money stashed in it.

77 shares on X this month:

Lie during your job interview because they’re lying to you about their great work environment.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇿 has bookmarked:

Wooden pews are designed to maximize the shame of farting in church.

Someone from 🇱🇸 has bookmarked:

Thinking of starting a religion around cheese.

Someone from 🇬🇶 has viewed:

I will never understand people’s fascination with their ancestry, isn’t knowing your current family bad enough.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has downloaded:

Sometimes you show up to work, and they just torture you for hours.

Someone from 🇦🇿 has shared:

You got a better chance getting chased by a dog than by me.

Someone from 🇳🇮 has copied:

No parenting book prepares you for the stank of your kid’s soccer bag.

Someone from 🇰🇿 has viewed:

Are there any medium rappers? They’re always Big or Lil.

Someone from 🇱🇧 has shared:

My cat smells like cigarettes again and I’m sick of his excuses.

Someone from 🇦🇺 has viewed:

Who really needs jetpacks, I want to be able to start over from my last save point.

Someone from 🇧🇿 has viewed:

There are two types of people in politics. Avoid them.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on Threads:

The worst is when it’s too late to take a nap but too early to go to bed.

Freshly posted on TikTok:

No revenge, because I don’t even remember what happened.

Seen just now on Facebook:

It amazes me how much exercise and extra fries sound alike.

Seen just now on YouTube:

Forgetting to put jewelry and perfume on is literally the worst feeling.

Just shared via WeChat:

Pluck a single eyebrow hair in 1994, and it never grows back. Pluck a single chin hair today, and it’s back with five friends by 6 p.m.

Trending via YouTube:

My favorite delusion is that I just need to get through this week.

Broadcasted on WhatsApp:

I’m not saying Lois Lane is a bad investigative journalist, but my friend Greg didn’t wear glasses to work yesterday and I recognized him by lunch time.

Going viral on Twitch:

Being an adult feels like, “If I can just get through this week, I’ll be okay,” but it’s every damn week.

Spotted on X:

If you don’t buy any snacks, you’re proud for a moment and then incredibly sad.

Freshly posted on Threads:

Having to pee when you’re driving is problematic. Having to sneeze when you’re driving is even more problematic.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Remember: if nobody hates you, you’re not trying hard enough.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

My favorite thing to do is nothing.

If you listen closely, you can hear me not caring.

People keep wishing January was over like the worst month of the year isn’t coming up next. Thats like wishing someone would stop arguing with you and just punch you in the face.

Halloween is a big day for dogs who love to absolutely lose their shit when the doorbell rings.

Babe, are you okay? You’ve barely responded to my telepathic messages.

All I care about is being financially stable and getting sexier.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨