Wordgag ツ

10,000+ funny quotes

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇨🇿 has viewed:

I love saying “You’re welcome!” really loudly when someone hasn’t thanked me.

Someone from 🇦🇴 has shared:

Awake? You may be entitled to compensation.

Someone from 🇨🇬 has downloaded:

Much of my algorithm is based on when I paused while scrolling to grab a snack.

Someone from 🇰🇬 has downloaded:

Unfortunately, I do enjoy watching the downfall of people who did me wrong.

Someone from 🇻🇨 has downloaded:

One thing nobody gives pigeons enough credit for is their ability to get out of the way on the sidewalk. A lot of you could learn a thing or two from them.

Someone from 🇳🇬 has shared:

You should leave your comfort zone and come to mine instead.

Someone from 🇵🇭 has bookmarked:

When you’re a snowman, everything smells like a carrot.

Someone from 🇧🇼 has copied:

If one door opens when another door closes, your house is probably haunted.

Someone from 🇧🇳 has shared:

My favorite game is guessing if my headache is due to dehydration, migraine, malnutrition, stress, lack of sleep, poor posture, or a brain tumor.

Someone from 🇫🇯 has viewed:

Relationship status: I love my bed.

Funny Quotes Data 🤓

New Funny Quotes

0 this month

Funny Quotes Total

15,269

Funny Quotes Topics

17,387

Funny Quotes Images

15,269

Updated

Dec 31, 2025

Users Online

3,419

Social Media Log 💫

Going viral on Pinterest:

Odd people reviewing a dessert: It’s not too sweet which is what I like.

Just shared via WhatsApp:

Winter is actually awesome because if you put on a couple of movies at 5 p.m., it’s already pitch black and the evening is super long, so it feels like you’re staying up til 2 a.m., but in reality, it’s only 11 p.m. 10/10!

Just landed via X:

“What’s your blood type?” I don’t know, boiling!

Trending via Threads:

Sitting next to you on an empty train and clicking my stopwatch every time you turn a page in your book.

Trending via WeChat:

Inside every older person is a younger person wondering what the hell happened.

Shared recently on Discord:

Doing some skin care routine but my skin doesn’t care.

Spotted on TikTok:

Cleaning a house with children in it is like shoveling snow on the North Pole.

Live now on WhatsApp:

I find as I get older it’s the little things that bring me joy. Like embarrassing my children.

Making waves on WeChat:

We go together like Drunk and Disorderly.

Broadcasted on X:

Telling everyone I’m an undecided voter because I need the attention.

She was rare, like a shopping cart at the grocery without a wobbly wheel.

2 months ago

Download image ↓

Commentary:
Finding her is like hitting the lottery—if the lottery were corralling carts! 🛒💃✨

cart, grocery, rare, shopping, shopping cart, wheel, wobbly, wobbly wheel

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

I wish I could Shazam a perfume.

0

2 months ago

app, fragrance, humor, i, music, music app, perfume, scent, Shazam, technology, wish
I love when women have one daughter as their only child. It’s so incredibly chic.

0

2 months ago

chic, child, daughter, family, humor, i, love, only, parenting, single, single child, woman, women
I called the cops on my own party, because I was ready to go to bed.

0

2 months ago

bed, bedtime, call, cop, cops, event, humor, i, joke, own, party, ready, sleep, social, social event
Sleep is a free trial of death but with ads.

0

2 months ago

ads, death, free, humor, irony, sleep, trial
No show does a misunderstanding / miscommunication plot better than Modern Family does.

0

2 months ago

better, comedy, family, humor, miscommunication, misunderstanding, modern, Modern Family, plot, show
It should be socially acceptable to just face the wall at a party when you need a break from talking.

0

2 months ago

break, face, humor, introvert, just, need, party, social, talking, wall

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

79 shares on Messenger this month:

Enemies to lovers is only good if they’re gay. If I wanted to see a man and a woman yell at each other, I’d just go downstairs and eat with my parents.

30 shares on X this month:

How long does it take for an apple to turn brown after you cut it? Never mind.

25 shares on Instagram this month:

I have this ability where I can look at someone’s profile picture and determine whether they are evil or not.

53 shares on WeChat this month:

When my friends are religious, I pretend not to notice.

27 shares on TikTok this month:

Relationship goal: synchronizing our eye rolls.

14 shares on Telegram this month:

Today, I noticed that the cover of my ironing board was wrinkled, and I laughed at the irony. Then I laughed again because of the word “irony.”

27 shares on Discord this month:

Never mind a Roomba, I need a robot garbage can that will follow my kids around the house all day.

56 shares on WeChat this month:

Cover letters are so embarrassing. Why am I writing a love letter to this shitty company?

21 shares on Twitch this month:

A long time ago, being crazy meant something. Nowadays, everybody is crazy.

57 shares on Facebook this month:

Are French bulldogs actually French? They seem kinda Puerto Rican.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇹🇴 has copied:

Once you are able to find humor in any situation, you’ve either reached enlightenment or you’re just a little unhinged.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has bookmarked:

Do you also watch porn until the end to see if they end up getting married?

Someone from 🇹🇼 has viewed:

Apparently the thirstiest creature in the whole world is always a kid who’s been told to go back to his bed like a hundred times.

Someone from 🇨🇭 has viewed:

If cats could send Christmas cards, they wouldn’t.

Someone from 🇦🇬 has bookmarked:

They should make a movie that’s good the whole way through.

Someone from 🇸🇮 has viewed:

Is it fall yet? I really can’t suck my stomach in much longer.

Someone from 🇳🇷 has viewed:

Pinterest is so therapeutic. There’s no drama, no one to argue with. Just pretty pictures.

Someone from 🇸🇾 has copied:

The ugliest version of me is the version that comes out when I play board games. I don’t know who she is, but she is a monster. She is not fit for human interaction.

Someone from 🇪🇪 has shared:

I am a full grown adult. Now listen to me discuss the various plot holes in Paw Patrol.

Someone from 🇺🇸 has shared:

I watched a woman clean her whole house on YouTube today, in case you thought I lacked ambition.

Social Media Log 💫

Just landed via Threads:

Thaw me like one of your french fries!

Just landed via Pinterest:

I get it dogs, I wish I could also bark at strangers approaching my house.

Breaking via X:

Being excited to get in bed is a different level of adulting.

Seen just now on X:

Everyone’s worried about a recession, but babes, we’re heading for a dark age.

Spotted on Facebook:

Dating these days is like trusting a crackhead to come back with your change.

Freshly posted on LinkedIn:

I didn’t mean to mimic your voice, I just had to know what it felt like to sound like that.

Just shared via Messenger:

I want to be a house cat and simply slap the shit out of anything in front of me that I do not understand.

Spotted on YouTube:

When I die, I hope I’m remembered for my ability to take any bad situation and make it worse.

Just landed via TikTok:

I come from a long line of people with something wrong with them.

Seen just now on Slack:

First World War. Kind of nervous.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

She was rare, like a shopping cart at the grocery without a wobbly wheel.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

I wish I could Shazam a perfume.

I love when women have one daughter as their only child. It’s so incredibly chic.

I called the cops on my own party, because I was ready to go to bed.

Sleep is a free trial of death but with ads.

No show does a misunderstanding / miscommunication plot better than Modern Family does.

It should be socially acceptable to just face the wall at a party when you need a break from talking.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨