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Commentary:
"Life motto: Be as adaptable as those people who change their faces as often as traffic lights change their lights 🚦💁‍♂️💁‍♀️ #ChameleonChic"

change, expression, faces, humor, light, lights, people, personality, traffic, traffic light

Trending Funny Quotes 👇

Trying to make sense of other people’s actions will drive you to insanity.

0

5 months ago

action, actions, behavior, confusion, drive, frustration, insanity, sense, trying, understanding
It’s so hot that my shadow just went back inside and gave me the finger.

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5 months ago

back, finger, heat, hot, hot weather, humor, inside, just, me, reaction, sarcasm, shadow, summer, sun, temperature, weather
One sec, lemme just find the off switch for my brain.

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5 months ago

brain, break, distraction, humor, just, mental, mental break, off switch, procrastination, switch
Just a friendly reminder folks. Don’t forget to set back your rooster this weekend.

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2 months ago

back, daylight, daylight saving, folks, forget, friendly, humor, joke, just, lighthearted, reminder, rooster, saving, set, time, weekend
The problem with self-checkout is that all the cashiers are idiots.

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2 months ago

cashiers, convenience, frustration, humor, idiots, problem, retail, self-checkout, shopping, technology
If I unsubscribe from your email list, I definitely do not need you to send a follow-up email to confirm.

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4 months ago

annoyance, confirm, confirmation, definitely, email, email list, email marketing, follow up, follow-up email, humor, i, list, marketing, need, send, unsubscribe

New Funny Quotes

🎲 Random Funny Quotes

Welcome to Wordgag! 😉✌️ Enjoy endless laughter with our collection of funny quotes guaranteed to crack you up. 😂💥

🎉🥂 New Year Quotes

Social Media Stars ⭐

38 shares on Threads this month:

Some of you are still single because, when someone sends you romantic words, you reply with “hahaha.”

16 shares on Telegram this month:

One of the biggest struggles of being an adult is deciding what to make for supper. Every. Single. Night.

83 shares on Telegram this month:

Having a nicotine addiction is basically just adding a new base layer to Maslow’s hierarchy for no reason.

56 shares on Twitch this month:

The worst thing about having children is the parents of the other children.

70 shares on Telegram this month:

Yabba dabba doo used to be a rad way to start a Saturday.

86 shares on WhatsApp this month:

There are two types of people in the world, those who have to go to Walmart, and those who get to go to Walmart.

49 shares on Reddit this month:

I’ve been asked to join a swingers club, but I’m a little nervous. What if I’m not good enough? I haven’t been on a swing since I was 9.

65 shares on WhatsApp this month:

The older I get, the easier it is for me to look at a situation and say: “Yeahhh, I’m out.”

83 shares on Messenger this month:

There should be an Olympics where athletes can take as many drugs as they want. Like, to hell with y’all, let’s see how high humans can really jump.

43 shares on TikTok this month:

Stop making Fast and Furious movies.

Activity Log ✨

Someone from 🇿🇲 has downloaded:

“Do you have any hobbies?” Lately, I’ve been really into panicking.

Someone from 🇧🇮 has viewed:

Receipts are like: Take this tiny piece of paper home with you and throw it away.

Someone from 🇿🇼 has copied:

Ummmm, no, I don’t watch ‘Instagram Reels.’ I have TikTok. I like to get my brain damage directly from the original source.

Someone from 🇧🇷 has shared:

I tried to act normal once, worst five minutes of my life.

Someone from 🇧🇴 has shared:

That period between finding out you got a new job and actually starting the new job is one of the best times in life.

Someone from 🇦🇱 has downloaded:

Warning: People who need to leave their homes today are advised that it is extremely Monday outside this morning.

Someone from 🇬🇹 has shared:

It’s okay to love your job. Just know it doesn’t love you back.

Someone from 🇱🇮 has viewed:

I wish more modern politics were about trying to stop the fulfillment of an ancient prophecy.

Someone from 🇫🇮 has bookmarked:

I don’t always say something stupid. But when I do, I keep talking and make it worse.

Someone from 🇺🇬 has bookmarked:

Having a nicotine addiction is basically just adding a new base layer to Maslow’s hierarchy for no reason.

Social Media Log 💫

Seen just now on LinkedIn:

I eat cake because it’s somebody’s birthday somewhere.

Going viral on TikTok:

Obituaries should have clickbait titles.

Going viral on Snapchat:

My husband has entered the “fun socks” years.

Breaking via Pinterest:

My neighbor said he heard me having sex today but it was just me standing in front of my air conditioner.

Spotted on TikTok:

I’m sorry I bit your hand when you reached for my popcorn.

Just shared via Threads:

I hate when my cat runs into my bedroom and hisses at an empty chair, then runs back out again; and I then have to fall asleep holding a crucifix.

Just landed via Twitch:

You can make a salad without lettuce if you want, there are no rules.

Shared recently on Slack:

Many fruits can be great names… but the real challenge is naming a child after a vegetable….

Just shared via Facebook:

If you think my posts are ridiculous, you should see some of my life choices.

Spotted on YouTube:

I’m one group chat away from vanishing into the woods to befriend forest creatures.

Wordgag ツ

Activity Log ✨

Some people change their faces like traffic lights change their lights.

Related Funny Quotes 🤝

Trying to make sense of other people’s actions will drive you to insanity.

It’s so hot that my shadow just went back inside and gave me the finger.

One sec, lemme just find the off switch for my brain.

Just a friendly reminder folks. Don’t forget to set back your rooster this weekend.

The problem with self-checkout is that all the cashiers are idiots.

If I unsubscribe from your email list, I definitely do not need you to send a follow-up email to confirm.

Social Media Stars ⭐

Trending Topics 📁

Activity Log ✨